Toddler Tantrum Tactics and Ninja Mom Moves – Ep. 92

Shanna

Hi, welcome to Big Fat Positive with Shanna and Laura. On this week's episode, we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, Mom Wins, where we get into ninja moves and paying it forward. And we wrap it up with our BFPs and BFNs. Let's get to it. Hi, welcome to episode 92 of Big Fat Positive. Laura, how you doing? I'm good. How are you? I'm good. How old's your baby? What's going on?

Laura

So my baby is 14 months old. This week, I have a little bit of a fail regarding his 14 month birthday, which is that, do you remember how I did? Not daily, oh my God, can you imagine? I did monthly photos with the same backdrop and the same toy while he was an infant. Oh yeah, so cute. Well, I had full intentions to keep that going after his first birthday, but his 13 month birthday rolled around and did not get a picture. So I think the main problem is that it's really, really hard to get a toddler to sit in one spot, even just for one quick photo. Oh, so you attempted it, but it was just it failed? No, I thought about attempting it and realized it was just going to be a nightmare. Oh, I see.

Shanna

Well, I commend you for even thinking about it, because to be honest with you, I have no awareness of my baby's monthly birthdays anymore. It's like once she hit a year old, it's just like a blur. The only reason I keep track is because of the podcast, it seems. Let alone taking a damn photo. I mean, I failed at that like at month two. So I commend you for your efforts. You have two kids. True.

Laura

Yeah, true. I'm in one kid world where every day is just a miracle. Every day is a miracle no matter what. But anyway, so I think I'm going to try to do every six months now. Okay, okay. So check back, see if I actually do that. So this week, so as you know, I've been discussing the construction that's going on in the back of my house for a long time. It's been going on for almost a year. Yeah, it really feels like 10 years. What is going on? Tell me it feels like 10 years. So supposedly it's going to be actually for real done this week. Good. for real. And I think in no small part because Corey and I finally like broke down and wrote a very sternly worded email to the construction company and was like, what the hell is going on? You know, we need timelines. We need answers. And they jumped to attention and have sent a flurry of people over to do all kinds of stuff.

Shanna

Uh-huh. Good, good, good. Well, I'm glad it'll be done soon. It will. I mean, nothing's worse than creepy painter dude staring at you, staring at your boobs through the window.

Laura

My boobs, it's usually boobs singular because it's like one is out. Oh, and there was this one day this week where I got the baby down for his nap and he's down to one nap now, right? We talked about how I went abruptly down to one nap and it's been going pretty well. except for it's my only alone time during the day, right? His nap time. Oh yeah. So I finally got him down for his nap this one day last week and I've like got him down, he fell asleep. I like go to sit on the couch and I'm just gonna like finally have some alone time. I was gonna like listen to my audio book and like do something and knock, knock, knock on the kitchen door. And it's one of the regular guys who's super nice. And he was like, I'm going to patch your ceiling and do this stuff. And I was like, help me. So like the entire 90 minute nap, it was a short nap for having one nap. I have a dude in my kitchen.

Shanna

Yeah, especially because you have an open kitchen to the living room.

Laura

Yes, it was all open floor plan. It's so cool, open floor plan. Everyone wants an open floor plan until you have people working in your house. So anyway, but I'm looking forward to being done and I'm trying not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but I'm just so ready to have my space back, you know? Definitely. Yeah. And then the other fun thing that happened this week is my mom came back for a short visit.

Shanna

Oh, nice.

Laura

A long weekend. And actually, she ended up staying at a hotel because the back was being worked on, which she didn't mind. I didn't have to twist her arm because she loves going to this fancy hotel nearby and swimming in the pool and stuff. So we got to have a little staycation. One day, I knew they were going to be working. So I just brought my toddler over and they got a crib. The hotel gave us a crib. And we did his nap at the hotel. And so it was really, really fun to have that sort of mini-stacation. And he's just so cute. So he's really just blossoming socially, I feel like, in addition to his words and all his gross and fine motor skills, he just is starting to really show a lot of affection to people when they show up and he loves my mom. And whenever he sees her, just gets this giant smile on his face, even when we FaceTime.

Shanna

Oh my God.

Laura

So cute. He walks around with it all the time. I'll have to post a picture of it. It's so cute. So we are all happy with our mop broom. Yeah. What's going on with you guys this week? Are you feeling better?

Shanna

Yes, I am feeling better. And CeCe is 14 months and three weeks. And she has recently like come out the tail end of a leap, which, you know, during the stormy part of it. It was hard, and she was very fussy, but I'm starting to see those developmental changes now, which is so interesting. And for those of you who don't know what I'm referring to, there's a book called The Wonder Weeks, and they have an app that I use the app. And it talks about the, what do you call it, the cognitive leaps that a baby goes through where they're kind of predictable. They happen at a certain age. It's really tracked for my kids and I love keeping track of it. One thing I noticed is that she has what I think intentionally thrown her first tantrum. And it wasn't horrible, but usually it's just kind of like I'll pick her up to redirect her at the library. And the second I touch her, she screams. Yeah.

Laura

And created a monster.

Shanna

Yeah, so she saw it, but it was full of clean clothes, and I wasn't going to the laundry room, and I just didn't want to give her a ride at that moment. I was busy. So she was like, ah, ah, ah, and holding the laundry basket and looking at me, ah, ah. And I said, no, we're not going to ride in the laundry basket right now. And she stopped and stared at me and processed the fact that I denied her. And then she let go of the basket, flopped on the floor, and went, yeah. And just how old?

Laura

You know she's safe and well taken care of. It reminds me of that thing. It's like, why is my toddler crying? It's like a meme, right? Yeah, I think we've talked about that before.

Shanna

Yeah, totally. It's like, oh, I won't let you. I won't fly you around the house in a laundry basket right now. You poor soul. And so I was like, luckily, she's still pretty easily distracted. So I was like, do you want to go find a box to sit in? And she's like, yeah. She says, yeah, all the time now too. Wouldn't I ask questions? Yeah. Like, OK. And by the time we went out to the living room to find a box, she'd completely forgotten about it and everything. But it was just that mental connection. I said no. She heard it, thought about it, and then decided to pitch a fit. And I was like, oh, boy, here we go. That's so funny. Yeah, and I think that's one of the things that they kind of develop in this last leap, which is called the leap of principles.

Laura

The leap of principles? This is the last, you're on the final leap?

Shanna

No, I think it's the leap nine. Oh, so when you say last leap, you mean the most recent leap? Her most recent leap, yeah, yeah, yeah. So they're kind of, when they're coming out of this leap, they're kind of understanding that there are many ways to accomplish a goal. So they can, you know, force their way. They can manipulate their way. They can, they're like playing with different ways of getting what they want. And I just felt like that was such a, you know, she was thinking about it. She wanted to write in that thing. And then she thought that if she would like throw a tantrum and show how upset she was, she would get her way. So I thought it was really clever. I don't know. I was kind of proud of her for that tantrum.

Laura

Is that a weird reaction? She wasn't just giving into her emotion. She was like trying to create a new reality for herself. That's what it seemed like.

Shanna

Yes, exactly. It didn't work. She didn't succeed, but that's OK. So I'm just like, oh boy, here we go with the tantrums. I feel like I'm just more girded up for tantrums and stuff with the second kid because I've been through it before and because ZC's been such a screecher and crier from day one that I'm kind of just got this like emotional wall in a way that I'm not as scared to see her upset. As I was with Elle, I would do a lot of things to prevent her from feeling upset or crying. And I'm just like, well, Cici's a crier. There's nothing I can do about it.

Laura

Well, you never had to do sleep training with Elle, right? She just naturally slept through the night. Yeah. I feel similarly because I used to think, oh, I could never hear my baby cry. It would break my heart. Then you do sleep training and you're just like, oh yeah. That sounds callous. People who are listening who probably haven't done it might be like, oh my God, that's so mean. But it's not about, it's just sometimes, I don't know, I don't think all babies are like this, but my baby and your baby, I think your baby more than my baby, they just have to cry to let out emotion sometimes. It just has to happen. Yeah, it's like a pressure release valve in a way and it's not like they're not attended to or taken care of You know I am worried about tantrums because I'm seeing little pre tantrums in my guy You know doing the like you what did you call it the going boneless thing?

Shanna

Well I get it because even as an adult sometimes like stress and pressure builds up and I like try to keep myself together for so long and then all of a sudden I I mean it's not like I have tantrum crying fits or anything but sometimes like a good cry helps or just like a Steve I need to vent to you and like I'm like and then I'm like yeah I think my kids and baby need that too you know my kid and baby need that sometimes too it makes sense it's like an emotional release

Laura

And the other thing she mentioned was, you know, she had this sort of ladder from like the bottom was asleep. The top was tantrum in the middle was like calm and, you know, calm and emotionally regulated. And there were sort of different levels, but you can imagine what they are, you know, like sleep, drowsy, you know, calm, whatever it goes up. all the way to Tantrum. And she pointed out that the center, anywhere between slightly excited to calm That's where learning can happen. But at the extremes, learning can't happen. When you're asleep or drowsy, learning's not happening, right? And we all know that. But when you're on the other end of it, when you're in like near tantrum or extremely emotionally dysregulated, you're also not going to learn. And of course, you're like, I'm not trying to teach my kid the alphabet when they're having a tantrum.

Shanna

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, sometimes when they're out of control like that, they just need our gentle guidance to affirm gentle guidance to get them to a safe place and let them work out their emotions. It reminds me the first time that Elle, when she was maybe two, had a tantrum. And when I say tantrum, I'm not talking about that extreme, like, 10 out of 10 that you were describing like completely out of control. But you know, on the higher end, she had that at the drugstore at Rite Aid. And so her first like public meltdown. And you know, everything I had read and learned kind of before that point was like, you know, just remove them from the situation. Even if you have to like leave your cart and just remove them calmly. And so it happened and like we were in line, everyone was staring at us and I was just like, we're leaving the store now. And that was it.

Laura

I feel like tantrums are also prime mom judging time, you know? Oh, definitely. You always hear from people about like, I would have done this or I would have done that and I just... No, you don't know until you're there.

Shanna

No. A really great book. We both love Janet Lansbury and her first book, The Elevating Childcare Really Deals with Infants and Babies, but now that our kids are toddlers, I recommend, if you haven't read it yet, and I recommend to our listeners, No Bad Kids. That's her second book. Oh, I have not read it. It deals with toddlers and it is awesome because I'm sorry, but for me personally, toddlers are way more challenging than infants. And I had what I think was kind of a challenging infant with CECE, but toddlers because they've got will and you know vocabulary and more strength and they can run away from you and they can run away it's it's harder and so she gives a lot of great strong too yes I can't believe how strong he is sometimes like pushing me away or oh my god like you can barely hold on to them sometimes Yes, it's really hard.

Laura

Yeah, I need to read it. I'm going to get it for sure.

Shanna

Yeah, read that. And then the other thing, the only other little check-in this week that's really cute, you mentioned your guy showing more affection. Cece, same, her affection is over the top right now. I mean, she gives hugs and kisses to everything. My dog, Chilly, she'll like, you know, put, you know, her head on him and then like kisses fur. I'm talking bath toys. She gives hugs and kisses to her dolls, her stuffed animals, everything. And it's and us too. Yeah. And oh my God, it's Just so sweet and so cute. It's just a wonderful thing about toddlers. It's wonderful. I love it.

Laura

Makes up for all the tantrums. Exactly.

Shanna

Balance is out.

Laura

My guy has learned how to blow kisses.

Shanna

Oh, yes. I was going to mention that too. Mm-hmm. Oh, it's so cute. So cute. My girl does it wrong.

Laura

And I'm like, she's pulling you a kiss. Bye-bye. That's how she says bye-bye. Oh, that's so cute. He just never remembers to do it until after someone's left. That we're working on it. Like, I'll be like, say bye-bye, blow a kiss. And like Corey will be leaving for work or whatever. And he he'll just be sort of staring at Corey the minute Corey is out of view. He's like, ma, ma, ma. I'm like, baby, you got to do it when he's in front of you. So we're working on that. Oh, my God. That's so cute. That's the same with her, too.

Shanna

So anyway, those are my check-ins. Should we take a break and come back with our special segment, Mom Wins?

Laura

Yeah, let's do it.

Shanna

Yeah, I have a couple. I'll start with this one. OK. So recently, Elle did her four-year appointment, check-up appointment at the doctor. I think I mentioned that in a previous episode. But what happened after that, I feel kind of ended up in a mom win. So I'm going to talk about that. OK. So after the appointment, she gets shots and all this stuff and blood draw. And she was such a trooper, so brave.

Laura

Well, mine is actually very similar, so I feel like I should share. Oh, hilarious. What is yours? Well, OK, so with the construction in back, one of the things they've been doing is they are breaking up a giant concrete slab in the back of our house and repouring concrete. So there were like three days we couldn't walk out back. And we live on a hill. So in order to get to our house, it's like street to street, right? So if you park on the street in front, you have to walk up pretty decent flight of stairs, like it's pretty steep, right? And if you park in the back, you park in the garage and you go down the stairs, but we couldn't park in the garage and go down the stairs. So that was fine. I, before this happened, I decided I took one of our strollers and I brought it out front and I, you know, it's a folding one you can carry with one hand. So I was like, okay, I'll just, you know,

Shanna

Yeah, true. You instinctively bought the right amount. Just the right amount. Yeah. That's awesome. Good for you and a workout to boot. Yeah, I got my workout. Exactly. Real good. Anyway, do you have another one? I do have another one. This one also takes place in my favorite strip mall near my house because we walk there all the time.

Laura

I feel like we need to like you need to go do an Instagram live or something sometime and walk us around this amazing strip mall.

Shanna

Oh, God. No, no, no, no. See, this is part of the reason I need to move out of this neighborhood, because this is like my life. This is damn strip mall. And part of the reason is, half the time, I don't have a car. Steve and I have one car, and he takes it to work. And my mother-in-law has a car. And when she's here, I can use it and stuff, you know, when it's available. But I don't always have that. So we walk a lot to places, and that's so convenient.

Laura

And as you say, it's not like one little strip. It's a huge complex.

Shanna

Yes, it's a huge complex of stores. I'd say there's probably like 40 stores and restaurants and stuff. Yeah, it's very big. It's just getting old, Laura. I'd really rather walk to like a park or something like that. So anyway, and you probably also know over... all these podcasts that I really love Jersey Mike, Subway Sandwiches, I guess they're not Subway Sandwiches, Subway is a separate sandwich shop.

Laura

Sub Sandwiches. I think it's a regional situation. It's like Hoagie, Sub, yeah, anyway, go ahead. I don't know what they are in Jersey.

Shanna

No, yeah, I don't know. So Cici and I walked down to Jersey Mike's to get some sandwiches, get some fresh air and I'm standing in line and I order my sandwiches and I'm like, you know, I need some extra chips because I just never have enough chips and I want to have like chips for later. So I got like extra chips. And I just really like indulged in this order for some reason and got up to the cash register. And I should mention that Cece and I were really on point with our fashion this day. You know, I was pushing her in her little pink car, her little portable car thing. And I was for some reason wearing the hot pink shirt that I got for her birthday party. So we were just a pink explosion. I think we really stood out, you know, me and this baby in line at Jersey Mike's and I go to pay.

Laura

Well, obviously your cute pink shirts elicited this free lunch.

Shanna

Yeah. It's a win that I had as a mom, I guess.

Laura

Well, it's nice. It's a nice compliment. It makes you feel good. Like, it's good. It's a good thing. A good thing happened.

Shanna

It was really sweet. And it started to make me think, like, maybe I should do that for someone. I'm so shy. Well, that's not true. I'm not shy, but I get weird about I don't know interacting with strangers sometimes Starbucks you know after this and there was a mom with twins in front of me and I was like oh I should pay it forward and buy her drinks and then I had this impulse and then I was like no no no no that's weird and then I just didn't do it and I'm like I don't know.

Laura

When you just go for it, you can make someone's day. There's still time. Yes, exactly. The great thing about paying it forward is there's not a timeline on it. Yeah.

Shanna

So maybe I'll challenge myself to do that for a mom in particular, I think, would be a cool thing to do. Someone with a baby and just brighten her day a little bit. So that, yes, that's my second mom. When do you have another one? Should we maybe come back after the break and hear yours? OK.

Laura

Okay. But I feel like a superhero for this. So when we are getting ready for bedtime, we have this whole routine and it involves going to our futon. There's a futon in the baby's nursery. And we like do our diaper change on the, you know, getting, he's straight from the bath. So we put it on the diaper and we put on the sleep sack and the jammies and all that stuff on the futon. And the futon, it's not high off the ground, it's a low futon. But recently, you know, he's been, very energetic at bedtime for the most part. And he likes to sit up and play with things. And he's been doing this thing where he likes to flop back onto the futon, right? And that's fine, I guess, as long as there's nothing behind him. But one night we were getting ready, and it was a night when Corey was working late. And so I was doing bedtime all by myself, which is already like,

Shanna

Yes. The mom instincts, they are wild.

Laura

You're like a ninja. It's amazing. And so I felt very proud that I like had figured that out and like my body did it without my mind thinking about it. And then it made me think also of have you seen those video compilations of like dad saves? Like basically it's just a whole compilation of like dad's grabbing kids midair basically.

Shanna

I think I know what you're talking about but there's something also just like very chill about the way dads do it. Like they're just standing there and all of a sudden like their hand will go Just like snap out and catch a kid or something.

Laura

Yeah, they're like still holding their beer. Yeah, exactly. I felt like that. I felt like I was saving my baby midair. But yeah, that made me feel very good and protective. And I need to teach him to not throw himself off the futon.

Shanna

Yeah, that would be good.

Laura

Nicely done, Laura. Thank you. Round of applause for you. You too. Round of applause for you. Thanks. Trying not to do it too loud into the mic and make everyone upset. So should we move on to our BFPs and our BFNs? Let's do it.

Shanna

I have a BFP.

Laura

Wow, that was a roller coaster.

Shanna

I tried to emotionally control you and my listeners. Psychological manipulation. Oh, well, that leads perfectly, perfectly into my BFP. We did not plan this. OK, this is perfect.

Laura

It's just because you psychologically manipulated me into using that term.

Shanna

I must have. Wow. I'm more genius than I give myself credit for. My BFP this week is The Happy Song.

Laura

Okay.

Shanna

You know about this? No. Okay. I'm excited to tell you. So The Happy Song, I came across recently, someone shared it in one of my mom's groups. It's a song by Imogen Heap. She's an English musician.

Laura

Do you know of her at all? I know she exists. I can't name one of her songs. But you don't forget the name Imogen Heap.

Shanna

No, you really don't. And I was actually familiar with her because she used to be in a band called Fru Fru. Oh, she was Fru Fru.

Laura

She was Fru Fru. I do know because I know that song from the Garden State soundtrack. Yes.

Shanna

I think that's really where she came to be well known. I saw her years and years ago. When I first moved to LA, it's Space Land. When Space Land existed, it's a club. It's back now. It's back.

Laura

Is it? It changed to something else, and I think now it's back to being Space Land. Cool. Anyway. So that's the one, like, let go, let go. It's all airy and stuff, right?

Shanna

Yeah, she's a very airy, pretty high voice singer. I love her. I've been a fan of hers for years. So anyway. I was like, oh, Imogen Heap, I got to check this out. The happy song. And the real reason I wanted to check it out is because this song was scientifically engineered to make babies happy. What? Yes. Okay. Okay. So I didn't know the backstory when I first discovered it. I knew that it was scientifically engineered to make babies happy. So I had to learn what was going on. It turns out, so there's a British baby food company called Cow and Gate. And their advertising agency actually came up with this idea to scientifically create a song to make babies happy. So it's a little bit like commercially driven, but that does not matter to me. It does not matter. So they hired some child psychologists, music psychologist, bunch of scientists to, first of all, ask parents

Laura

Yeah, I mean.

Shanna

What are your thoughts?

Laura

Yeah, my concern is that it might be annoying AF, but also that like anything to make the babies happy is preferable to them screaming. So yeah, I'm skeptical, but I because it's your BFP, I have a feeling it works.

Shanna

Well, look, my life since having kids is full of annoying songs, you know, it's so I'm kind of it's par for the course in my house. So I'm like, I'm going to put this on. She woke up unhappy. And I remembered that I'd seen this in my Facebook feed. And I was like, Alexa, play the happy song by Imogen Heap. And it starts going, starts with this little baby laughing and CECE. Alexa. Oh my god.

Laura

I was just going to say, I bet there's listeners who have like Alexa responding. And then yours just did.

Shanna

It did, although. the one in my room is not too smart. She's like, I don't understand. Yeah. So the baby starts laughing at the beginning and Cece like instantly stopped crying. She looked over at the speaker and it was almost like just something like shook her out of that brain space for a second. Like she just was so curious to tune into something else. And then the song starts and it's very catchy. It's like do do do do do do. You know, should we play a little bit? Are we allowed to play a little bit? I think we could play like 15 seconds for fair use.

Laura

I think.

Shanna

Okay, okay. I'll play a little bit, Laura, so I can hear it.

Laura

I want to hear it because I have no idea. This all just sounds like weird Frankenstein music to me.

Shanna

Well, she's a legit musician. It's not like she just put together clinks and clanks from tin cans or something. And I should say that she's also a mom of a toddler, at least when she wrote the song, her baby was a toddler. So I think the video shows her getting a lot of input from her baby. She knows the struggle. She knows the struggle. She knows the audience. Let's see.

Laura

That's very, that is actually very cute. And I kind of want, I'm going to go listen to the whole song soon.

Shanna

Yeah, it's cute. It's like two and a half minutes. So I was like, okay, so it worked this one time. I was thrilled, right? I'm like, Oh my God, maybe it is a happy song. And that was the first time I heard it. And I was like, that's really cute. You know, I like her voice. I think it's pretty and light. airy mm-hmm and I have been playing it a few times a day not just when she's freaked out but you know just to kind of brighten the mood and now that CECE recognizes the song. It's like her reaction is even more over the top, like she'll stop what she's doing, look at the speaker, smile instantly when she hears that opening baby laugh. And then when Fufu or Imogen Heap starts singing, she will like dance, like stand in place and like stomp her feet and dance and like, I mean, It makes her so happy and Elle loves it too. She asks to hear it all the time now and in turn, it makes me happy.

Laura

Yeah, we need to do like hashtag happy song challenge and like record our babies listening to it for the first time. I'll do that.

Shanna

Oh my gosh, I love that idea. I really hope it works for people because I am so bought into this. I love it. I will say I have not bought any cow and gate products. I don't know how good of a marketing tool it is, but I just really love it. So I'm sharing that with everybody.

Laura

The cynic in me wants to download it and look and see if there's hidden tracks where it's like, Like how in gate fun baby products, you know, like very subtly underneath everything.

Shanna

Oh, it's just a subliminal message the entire song. Yeah. Yeah.

Laura

The baby babbling is like just that backwards.

Shanna

Also Paula's dead.

Laura

Uh, who? Oh, do you not know? There's a thing with the Beatles. It was I can't remember if it was Abbey Road or what, but there was some like I think it was Abbey Road where like if you played the album backwards. it supposedly at some point it like said, Paul is dead. And so like it started this conspiracy theory that Paul McCartney was dead and they like replaced him with another person. That's where that started.

Shanna

Fascinating. Yeah, maybe they threw that in there too.

Laura

Why not? Why not?

Shanna

Okay, I can't wait to try this. Yes, let me know for sure. What about you? What do you have this week?

Laura

Well, I have a BFN, which is wrapped up in a BFP. Well, no, it's all related. So if I think I had mentioned that my baby is walking well now, but he couldn't stand up from the ground, from the flat ground, he needed like something raised to push it up on to get to standing. Well, now he can totally stand up straight from the ground. He just like it clicked and he can do it, which means he can like get up and running from anywhere, which is great. The BFN part of this is that we've been going to a lot of parks now because like you had mentioned, once the baby can actually walk well, you're like, we can go to parks again. Like they can run around. It's so great. So great. And the weather's been so nice. So we went to this local park recently that's gorgeous and lovely and kind of set up shop underneath a tree.

Shanna

Hopefully through these sticks. What are we talking about?

Laura

They're like, I want to say like two to three inches long. It's perfect poke the eye out length, you know?

Shanna

You could just put swimming goggles on him while he plays at the park.

Laura

Yeah, yeah, that'll go over really well.

Shanna

That's tough. Parks in general with babies that run are tricky. Recently we went to our local park and I was letting her kind of have free reign of the grass and area and stuff. And she just started like kind of running towards the street, which, you know, I can catch up with her and stop her. But I noticed that she was running in the direction of a single woman in her maybe 20s or 30s sitting on a wall. that just for some reason from a short distance gave me the heebie-jeebies, and I was like, oh man, don't run towards that person, please. I don't want to interact with that person right now, because I'm a bitch. But I didn't want to stop my toddler and obviously move her away from running towards the person, because I also want to come across as polite. Yes, yes. Being polite, very, very.

Laura

very much overrides a lot of other things. No, I get it. I'm with you. I feel bad. What happened the other day? Oh, so I was at a stoplight behind another car. And I was just waiting for the light to turn. The light turned green and the car didn't go. So I lightly tapped on my horn because I figured they were looking at their phone or whatever. And so then the car left and I realized that like, but then I noticed that there was a person who was asking for money on the corner and like they had like summoned the guy over. and was like about to give him money, but then they took off because I looked.

Shanna

Oh, you racked up some bad karma points for that one, Laura. I felt so bad.

Laura

And then I was like, I was like, do I circle back around? I don't have cash for this guy. I felt really, really bad, although I kind of feel like if it was a big enough deal, the person wouldn't have driven away just because I lightly tapped on my horn. Uh-huh. Like it wasn't like a, eh, move, asshole. You know, it was just like a, like, ugh, I don't know. Maybe, maybe I read the situation wrong, but I felt like a real jerk. I don't know if that's related to your situation.

Shanna

Well, the person in front of you perhaps felt like they wanted to be polite in going when they're honked at. So it stopped them from, you know, there's just so much wrapped up in like trying to be a polite person in society. It just, it bugs me when it goes against my gut. I mean, this person was not dangerous or anything. I don't think that CeCe was going towards. It's just like, you know, I don't know. Well, my gut was spot on on this, you know, just like I didn't want to get in a conversation with this person. CeCe just went straight to this person and we got so close that the woman turned around and was like, oh, cute baby. And I was like, oh, thanks. And I was like, all right, let's go.

Laura

They could poke an eye out, they could accidentally buy a new magazine subscription that may never come.

Laura

The dangers are real people. The dangers are real. But I am very, I just watching him run around the park is so cute. And I swear he went from zero to 60. Like he's running. You know, it's not like knees up running, but he's fast. And it's fun and scary.

Shanna

It is. It's really scary. Cece runs around the house. and Elle chases her, which is very cute because she giggles uncontrollably and thinks it's hilarious. But she's running around corners and edges and the French doors and the windows. And I'm just like, oh my god, slow down. And she gets hurt constantly. And it's like this old hat at this point. I hear you. We need to get our babies together, though, so they can run it out together. Chase each other. Yes. Yes. Oh my god. Cute, cute, cute.

Laura

Well, one week, we will both be healthy, and hopefully we won't all be mandatory quarantines.

Shanna

I know, right?

Laura

I'm already like, should I see you?

Shanna

Do you not want to be around my family who's constantly sick? I don't know. We'll wait till, like, maybe August or something like that.

Laura

August?

Shanna

August. Your mom's favorite baby name.

Laura

It all comes full circle. It does. Anyway, should we wrap things up?

Shanna

Yes. Listeners, if you're going to play that happy song for your baby, send us a message of video. Let us know. Laura, how can they reach us?

Laura

We are on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook at BFP Podcast. We also have a Facebook community group just search for Big Fat Positive Community. Request to join is a closed group, but I will add you right away and you can join in our Awesome conversations we're having in there, everything from breastfeeding to sleep schedules to just pictures of adorable newborns. It's great. You can also send us a voice memo or just a plain old email to contact at BigPapPositivePodcast.com or visit our website, BigPapPositivePodcast.com.

Shanna

And we want to thank you all for just killing it in the spreading the word department. We're getting more listeners every day, and we thank you so much for spreading the word to your newly pregnant friends, your new parent friends, your friends who you're trying to conceive. Thank you, thank you. Keep it up. And thank you for everyone who's given us a review. It's so, so helpful. So please, if you haven't done that yet, go out and give us a rating and review on whatever platform you listen. Big Fat Positive is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Thanks for listening everyone. We'll see you next week. Bye!