Mom Hacks for Time Management and Car Clutter – Ep. 290

Laura

Welcome to Big Fat Positive with Shanna and Laura. This week, we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, What the Heck?, where we give you tips for tackling transitions, capturing special moments, and more. And we close with our BFPs and BFNs for the week. Let's get started! Hello, everyone, and welcome to the show. This is episode 290. Hi, Shanna. Hello. Hello. So I think we should get straight to it, because I know a little bit about your week this week. And I think you have a bit of a check-in for us.

Shanna

Oh, yeah. I had a bit of a week. So let's just dive right in.

Laura

Yes. Okay. Let's go. Let's hear about it.

Shanna

Okay. Well, you know, we've had an eventful couple of weeks around here. We had CECE's birthday and then last week we witnessed that car accident. And I was like, okay, for sure. This is going to be a nice relaxing week, a lead up to Christmas. You know, I had a very stressful Christmas last year. I tested positive for COVID on Christmas and I've just been really looking forward to a completely different situation this year, like a nice, relaxed holiday season.

Laura

For sure.

Shanna

Well, the action never stops in the Yager household, Laura. The action never stops. And you know about this. So I'm retelling you. Pretend you don't know.

Laura

Well, to be fair, I know the high level stuff, but we haven't really gotten a chance to talk too much about the details because you've been busy. So I'm looking forward to being able to ask more questions.

Shanna

Before I start, I just want to say this is a medical situation all as well. In the end, nothing super bad happened to anyone.

Laura

Okay, but this still sounds pretty serious.

Shanna

Yeah. Okay. So recently, Steve has been having some like pain in his like stomach abdomen area. And just kind of writing it off. Like it wasn't horrible or anything. It actually went away for a little bit. So he had pain for like a week and it went away and he was pretty fine for CECE's birthday party and everything. And this week it started coming back. And it started getting pretty bad. And Monday night he also had a fever. And so I was like, oh my gosh, maybe you should go to the emergency room. So he went down to the ER near us and it was very busy. It was overwhelmingly busy. And this is like the height of flu and COVID season. And Steve was like, I don't know, maybe I could just like go to urgent care in the morning. So he left the ER and came home.

Laura

Okay and this is all last week not like not the week that we usually talk about but the previous week like when you witnessed the car accident this was all going on.

Shanna

Yeah yeah this was this was in the background of that. Got it. So he called our doctor's office here to see if maybe he could get in and see his regular doctor right away. Like he just had a sixth sense that something was going on. Like they had done an ultrasound on him at urgent care and they were like, you know, we're not really seeing anything. Like, and he did some blood work and these doctors kept coming back with kind of inconclusive results. So at this point, when he calls our doctor, he can't even bend over. And he talks to like the triage nurse, right? Who kind of talks to patients and sees if they need to come in or what. And after a conversation, she's like, you know, I think you should probably go to the hospital, go to the ER so you can get tests right away. Cause like he needed a CT scan or something a little more involved so we could really see what's going on in there.

Laura

Okay, so I know you gave the disclaimer at the beginning that this is a medical story and it's all okay now but like even though i know the outcome i'm listening to this and in my brain i'm still going oh my god please don't have cancer steve please don't get cancer which i know is not the outcome but like that must have been going through your mind right.

Shanna

Well that and a lot of other stuff because when he went to the urgent care like they saw a little something on his liver and so we were like I was like oh my god like what's going on I was definitely worried and I was trying to stay calm all week but those thoughts definitely come into your mind like what what is this what's going on and one of the most frustrating things about it is we didn't have any answers like these urgent care doctors and and whatever we're not giving us any answers and we just wanted to know what was going on so it was extremely stressful few days not knowing what was happening.

Laura

Yeah, for sure. And I feel like I had like messaged you about either recording or doing something like we're going to record ads or something. And I was like, oh, do you want to do it now? And you're like, well, actually, Steve is about to leave to go to the ER. His mom is taking him. So I might not be able to do that. And I was like, oh, shit, this is serious.

Shanna

Yeah. Yeah. Luckily, his mom is in town for the winter, so she was able to help out and take him down to the hospital because I had to pick up the kids, you know? So she takes him down there and it is just an absolute nightmare of a wait, right? They have to wait forever to get seen, to get tests, to get results, et cetera.

Laura

Meanwhile, he's in a lot of pain, right?

Shanna

He was, but it was weird. Like it wasn't horrible, like doubled over shooting pain. It's like when he moved certain ways, it would really, really hurt. But if he were like lying still, he was okay. So it's just a huge mystery what was going on.

Laura

Wow. Okay.

Shanna

So finally, after like seven hours, he gets his CT scan and the chief resident doctor comes in to see him and comes over with a chart and she said, okay, I have the results. Your appendix burst. And he was like, what? Like the way he told it is he basically immediately started crying because I don't know about you, Laura, but when I hear about someone's appendix bursting, like to me, that's emergency, like not good situation. Scary.

Laura

Yeah, it's definitely not a good situation.

Shanna

And when I told you that, you were like, oh my God, the same thing just happened to Stephen Colbert and he did a whole thing on it. And his situation was really bad.

Laura

Yeah, he was like in sepsis and stuff. He really almost died. If you're curious listeners, go look up like Stephen Colbert, Appendix Burst, because he tells a really great story about it on his show. But yeah, I literally just watched that the night before. And you text me. I'm like, how Steve, you know, I'm checking in with you every once in a while. And you just write back his Appendix Burst. I was like, what? Yeah. Oh my god.

Shanna

That totally shocked us because the way that I imagined an appendix bursting just seems like way more dramatic. Like he wasn't in excruciating pain. He was in a pretty good amount of pain, but not horrible. And so he was super worried when he found out about that. And the doctor saw him get so upset and she's like, oh, no, no, no, it's okay. It's okay. Everything is going to be totally fine. We, it's like the bacteria has gathered in one area. It's like in an abscess. I guess it's really bad when the bacteria kind of goes all over your abdomen, just kind of like free floating everywhere. So he was lucky in that regard. And she's like, you know, we're going to admit you and see what we can do to like drain the abscess and, and you know, help get you on your way. But she acted like this was a pretty normal thing and he was very relieved for that.

Laura

That's wild. It sucks so hard. But I'm so glad that they finally figured out what was wrong with him and he got good care.

Shanna

Yes.

Laura

But damn.

Shanna

Right? Me too. I will say. On that Monday, when he had his side pain and he had a fever of 102, I said, you should go to the ER, honey, because that could be appendicitis. That's why he went to the ER, but then he turned around and left. So I'm just saying, I had a little hunch, you know, at one point.

Laura

the moral of the story is that husbands should always listen to their wives because we are smart people who know what you need. You know what's funny though is that when I, you know, I was giving Corey updates on this the whole day when it was happening. And finally, you text me, you're like, his appendix burst. And I think it was pretty late, right? Like we found out, I think I was like getting ready for bed or something. Yeah. And I came out into the bedroom and I was like, oh my God, Steve's appendix burst. And Corey was like, I knew it. I called it. Really, he did, too? Yeah, when I told Corey that Steve was heading to the ER, he was like, I bet it's his appendix. Sounds like his appendix.

Shanna

Well, he's got a lot of experience on medical shows, so I used his knowledge.

Laura

I mean, that really is his knowledge. He worked on two medical dramas in his time, and one of them he worked on for, I think, three full seasons. So he's spent a lot of time like researching medical stuff so the two of us together are really really bad amateur doctors because I grew up with two doctors as parents and he's worked on medical shows like so between us we think we can diagnose things but we have zero actual qualifications.

Shanna

That's amazing. Well, look, we all did a lot better than those urgent care doctors Steve went to this week. That is true. Wasn't even on their radar. So I was like, I think one of my first reactions was being mad. I'm just like, why didn't they notice that? That's wild. But for whatever reason, they missed it, but they caught it at the hospital and he's fine. He's back home now. They drained that abscess and he feels great. He feels like a new man cause like he's gotten no pain in his abdomen. You know, he's on antibiotics, like everything's under control now.

Laura

And they didn't remove his appendix. That's the thing that surprised all of us. Well, not my mom's mom's like, yeah, they don't do that anymore. But like Corey and I were both like, oh dang, they didn't take it out.

Shanna

Yeah, isn't that crazy? So I guess it healed itself after it ruptured. Oh, man. They did not need to take it out. He does have an appointment in April to have it removed laparoscopically just to prevent that ever happening again. But they didn't take it out at the hospital. Interesting.

Laura

I guess that makes sense because if you have all that bacteria that you're already draining and clearing out, you probably don't want to like create a new wound by stitching something up if you don't have to. That's my theory. This is, again, my very amateur not a doctor theory. That's what I would guess. Do you know what my mom always told me growing up? Like anytime, you know, because I feel like when we were kids, like in the 80s, it was really like a scary thing. It was like quicksand us. I feel like we were scared of quicksand and appendicitis. We're like the two things we were afraid of. And I remember when I was a kid, if I'd get a tummy ache and I'd be like, oh my gosh, what if I have it? My appendix is bursting. My mom would make us jump up and down on our right foot, like really, really hard.

Shanna

Interesting. I wish I would have known that. And it sounds like Steve would not have passed that test. No, I don't think he would have. You know what really freaked me out about appendicitis when I was a kid? Was the poltergeist girl. Did you watch that movie poltergeist?

Laura

Yeah, I watched it way too young. Yeah. I really should not have been allowed to watch it, but I did.

Shanna

I watched it young too, but I loved scary stuff when I was a kid, so it didn't bother me whatsoever. And I loved that main actress and I found out that that's why she died as a kid.

Laura

Oh, is that how she died? I knew she died. I just didn't know how. Oh, that's sad.

Shanna

So I grew up terrified of appendicitis. So yeah, when I found out that Steve's appendix burst, I was like, what?

Laura

See what I took away from that movie was I became terrified of TV snow. I thought that's where the danger really lay.

Shanna

Yes. Yes. It is creepy. So obviously the point of bringing this up aside from just looping everyone in on what's going on in my life is to talk about how it impacts parenting because guess who can't parent when they're in a hospital for five days. Your husband.

Laura

Awfully convenient, Steve, to opt out the week before Christmas. Just kidding. I know, he did not choose this.

Shanna

Yeah, he went away to get himself some rest before Christmas and a busy time. Yeah, right.

Laura

All you have to do is have a major abscess in your abdomen.

Shanna

Yeah. No biggie, no biggie. Here's the thing, the girls were off school this week because this is Christmas break. So I had them home all day, every day while I was working. Actually, Elle, I sent off to an art camp for three hours a day. So she was occupied for a while. But it's hard of course to, you know, do everything and worry about your husband and try to go visit. That I felt really guilty about. He was, you know, like 40 minutes away and getting down there to spend time with him was difficult. And so there was just a ton to juggle. And of course I'm like, oh my God, of course my Christmas again is ruined. I was worried about Christmas. And I mean, I've just been a stressed wreck, basically.

Laura

Oh, Shanna. Well, there's always 2024, you know?

Shanna

There is, but he came home before Christmas Eve, so that's good, and he's doing better. The day after he got home, Elle got strep throat, so you know, that might lead us into Christmas, but like I said, it's non-stop over here at the Yagers. You guys keep it interesting. That's all I have to say. Keep it interesting. Oh, we tried, but I love Steve so much, and I'm so happy he's okay. We were all really worried about him for a while, He's good, he's healing great, and we love him.

Laura

Yeah, I'm so glad he's okay. I was worried about him too.

Shanna

Yeah, but yeah, that is our wild check-in for the week. What about you?

Laura

I want to fast forward to next week so I can hear a somewhat normal check-in from you because I feel like it's just been wild. Like there was the car accident and then this, and I just, I don't know, I'm just like, oh, Shanna, you need a break.

Shanna

I know, I know, I need a break.

Laura

OK, OK, to cleanse our palettes a little bit, I'm just going to start with this little check in. I was going to say for the end, but let me let me just sprinkle this in here so we can have a little levity. I just wanted to check in about how adorable Sebastian is right now and like what a delight he is to like take places and be around. I really noticed it this week partially because he was off school all week. So there is a lot of time with him. But specifically this one instance where I was at the park with him And Corey like went and picked up Augie from his like he he was in like a four hour camp in the afternoons this week, thankfully, all week. So like Corey went to pick him up. We were separated and something happened where Corey's like, can you get dinner?

Shanna

Mm hmm.

Laura

But I take it to the first in and out, and I can't even get in the drive-through line. It's like out onto the street. Like I just couldn't even get into it. I tried turning left into it for about three rotations of the light, you know? And then was like, oh, forget it. We're going to go to the other in and out. We're lucky we have in and outs very close by. And this one doesn't have a drive-through. I was like, so Sebastian, the only thing is if we go to this in and out, We're going to have to go in. He's like, we go in. I'm like, yeah, we go in. Is that OK? It's OK. It's OK. I'm like, OK, sweetie. And, you know, he's getting hungry at this point, tired. He had been out at the park for hours. And, you know, I was primed to expect this to be kind of a disaster, but I was already committed. We got to the other in and out and like got a miraculous parking spot.

Shanna

Oh, that's so sweet. Was he getting attention from other people for being so darn cute?

Laura

A little bit. He gets lots of smiles. I mean, he is so cute and he's very social. So you get a lot of smiles. But people were, I think the issue was the internet we went to was right by the Americana and the Glendale Galleria and everyone was doing their last minute Christmas shopping. And people were not in good moods. You know what I mean? Like people are busy. People were jostling for space. Like no one was in their best moment. So except for him. And so that was really nice.

Shanna

Good on him. That's amazing.

Laura

Yeah, I do have to say that was kind of a highlight of the week because other than that it was just kind of a stressful week for me as far as work goes. In my infinite wisdom, in an effort to re-enter the workforce more significantly, I accepted a site build, a website build months ago and didn't really look at the calendar that closely until I realized that they want to launch the site the first week of January. Oh, which meant that I just spent this last week, the week before Christmas cramming to build a website, like absolutely just pulling late nights and long hours and. kicking myself for just not being very good at work-life balance, like ever. I just feel like I cannot get ahead when it's time to get ahead.

Shanna

Oh, I'm sorry, friend. That is so hard and so frustrating. I mean, our lives, our work lives and our parenting lives blend so much because we both do our work from home. And so there's always this push and pull of like, do I work? Do I pay attention to the kids? I mean, no matter what I'm doing, I feel guilty and I can only imagine you feel the same, especially when you're doing these late nights and then you're probably waking up tired. And it's hard. I just want to acknowledge and validate that what you experienced is hard.

Laura

Thank you. The other thing is I kick myself because I feel like it's very feast or famine, very up and down. It's not so much like I have a job and I can just do my job every day. Oh, I have nothing to do for three weeks and then all of a sudden I have to work till 2am every day and I just, I really want to find a better way to live. But yeah, and I will say this is not at all Steve's fault, but I did also have to take on Steve's work this And we put out an extra bonus episode. I know for our listeners, they're like, wait, but that was weeks ago. But you guys all know how it works by this point. But we put up bonus episodes during the holidays. So we were recording extra episodes. And then I suddenly had to learn how to use Logic Pro to master things. So that was an added challenge.

Shanna

Yes. Yes. A lot going on, for sure.

Laura

When it rains, it pours. But the good news is Sebastian gives me lots of kisses. And I got my deadline done. So now I can enjoy the week between Christmas and New Year's next week in theory without having to work. Oh, good. Yay. Well, that's something. Yes. But that is it for my check-in this week. I think we should move on to our special segment. What do you think? Oh, I think we should.

Shanna

We are back and this week's special segment is What the Hack, where we share some of our favorite tips and tricks for parenting. Laura, you're up first and I want to know what is your first What the Hack?

Laura

Okay, so my first hack is for the situations where your kids are like, can I see, can I see on something funny they've done to their own like face or body? Like you're somewhere without a mirror and One example I can think of off the top of my head is if you're in like a bubble bath and you pile all the bubbles on top of their head and you'll be like, you've got bubbles all in your head and they go, I want to see, I want to see. Before you use your phone to show them the front facing camera, turn it on video and hit record because then you get to record their adorable reactions to seeing themselves.

Shanna

Oh, that's such a cute idea.

Laura

And I'm sending you two examples of these situations, both with Augie. Okay.

Shanna

Oh my gosh. How cute. Okay. So this first one, Augie is on a slide at the park and his hair is full of static sticking straight up all over. And I imagine he was like, I want to see my hair sticking up.

Laura

Yeah.

Shanna

So instead of just showing him the front facing camera, you hit record, then give it to him. So we got to see him, see himself and giggle at it and it's infectious. I love it.

Laura

Yes. And then let me set up this next one. So this next one is we're goofing around at bedtime and Augie discovered I was like leaning back, we're sitting on the nugget and I was using the triangle pieces like a backrest. And he discovered, you know, when my knees are up, I don't know what you can imagine how I'm sitting. And he discovered that he could like smush his face between my legs, you know, and he thought it'd be funny and talk and make the funny voice. And he was like, I want to see, I want to see. So this is that setup.

Shanna

OK. Let's see.

Laura

Yeah. And it's so easy. You're doing it anyway. So just record it.

Shanna

Yeah. Smart, smart.

Laura

All right. So that's my first hack. Shanna, what you got for us?

Shanna

So we recently got a new car, as I mentioned, a new lease on a Nissan Leaf. And when we got it delivered, there were two aluminum canisters in the cup holders. And I was like, oh my gosh, look, they gave us coffee cups with our new car. How cool. And I pick it up and I'm like, that is a weird lid for a coffee cup. It kind of is like a flap that goes up and down. And I was flummoxed for a bit. And then I was like, oh, it's a car trash can. I've literally never seen a car trash can that goes in a cup holder before. But I was like, that's awesome. Because usually trash goes all over our car.

Laura

Oh, the door is not the trash can? I thought the door was the trash can.

Shanna

Oh, typically, yes, girl. The door, the floor, the glove compartment, anything and everything. And I was like, you know what? I'm going to try out using this little trash can. And so I've been putting trash in there. It's great. But here's what's really cool is that the girls love it because there's two of them. And there's cup holders in the back seat. And so I was like, girls, this is your trash can. You put your trash in there and they love it. like Elle can reach it because she can lean forward. She uses a regular seat belt now so she can lean forward and reach it. So if Cici has like, I don't know, a piece of candy or whatever, she's like, Elle, can I have the trash can? And she leans forward, grabs it, they put it in there. So my hack is get yourself a car trash can that fits in the cup holder. I looked it up online. It's a thing. I never knew it was a thing. It's a thing.

Laura

I love that it fits in the cup holder because back in the day, way long time ago, I had one that went over the back of my seat, you know? But it gets in the way and then I always forget about it. So I think this is a better situation. So I am definitely going to look into that.

Shanna

Yeah. And then if you need your cup holder in the middle to put your drink, you take the little trash can and put it in the cup holder in the door, which is like a weird cup holder anyway, right? So, you know, there's lots of different places you can put it. So I love it. Thanks, Nissan. What a nice little perk with your lease. All right. What's your next hack?

Laura

This is actually kind of related to the last one. And it's a feature you can use in your photo library to just brighten your day. I saw this on TikTok from a user named Chris Carly. And he suggested that you go into your iPhone photo library, and if you need a little pick me up, you go to the search button that's in the bottom right corner, and you can search for laughter. And if you do that, Shanna, you can give it a try. All you have to do is type in laugh, and you'll see that it actually pops up.

Shanna

All right, let me see what happens. I'm trying it. Okay, opening my photos, search laugh. Okay, laughter comes up. Let's see.

Laura

And do you see how there's a little like sound bar next to it? Yeah. But if you search for laughter and then you can narrow it down, you can actually narrow it down by person. You can like put your kid's name in or the location. But it brings up every video that their AI or analysis has identified as having laughter in it. That is so cute. So you can just scroll through your videos and hear your child's laughter over and over and over.

Shanna

Aw. Isn't that so sweet? I love that. I scrolled all the way down to the oldest stuff on my phone. No. And one of the videos that came up is Cece and Augie, when their infants at Huntington on the blanket together. Oh my God. You have to send that to me. I'm going to send it to you right now because you just need to watch it.

Laura

Yes, I do. And I'll say that I went and tested this in Google Photos as well, and it works as well. And so if you don't have an Apple device, you're not completely left out. Oh my God, I remember this video.

Shanna

That's so cute. Oh, I love this idea. What a fun little pick me up.

Laura

So cute see we're already getting joy from it because we're seeing oh my gosh CECE they were must have been like she must have been like four months no maybe a little more and he was like three oh my gosh their little baby laughs oh they're so cute oh how cute oh my little baby listeners go do this right now you have to do this it's adorable

Shanna

So cute.

Laura

Okay. So there, there's my other make you smile hack.

Shanna

Aw, I love it.

Laura

Do you have another one for us?

Shanna

Okay. Here's my little sweet one. I actually haven't tried this yet, but I saw it on an Instagram reel and I thought it was such a good idea. And I think it's so cute in the video itself is really cute. It's from a user named Mrs. Katie Carlson. And her idea is to take packing tape, like clear packing tape. and put it on your kid's wrist with the sticky side out. So it's like a sticky little bracelet. And then you take your kid, like a toddler, little kid or whatever, and take them out for a nature walk. And then they can use that bracelet to stick things on that they find in nature. So that's a way to collect little treasures out in nature. So in the video, these little kids are so cute and they put like little leaves and little flowers and sticks and all these cute little naturey things they found. And by the end they have these little nature bracelets. It's super cute and sweet.

Laura

Oh, that's cute. I'm going to try that. We have a lot of packing tape. All right. What do you got for us? What's your next hack? Okay. My next hack, I'm going to stick with the tech stuff for right now. So at Augie's old preschool and Sebastian's current preschool, the check in and check out procedure requires you to scan a QR code in the app, like we use Brightwheel, right? So when you go into Brightwheel, you scan a QR code that they have posted like all around the school. And that's how you, and you put in like your own personal code and then you check in or check out the kids, right? Okay. That's easy. That's not a problem. The problem arises when you leave and you've forgotten to check them in and out. And there's no QR code to be found. And sure, they've sent you a digital version. You have it in your email and they have it in the app.

Shanna

You know what this reminds me of? When I would take L2 theater camp, they would scan a QR code on my phone to check her in. But if you forget your phone or you don't want to look it up on your phone every time, whatever, you could make it a watch face and then just stick your hand out the window and they can scan it real quick.

Laura

Yeah, there you go. OK, Shanna, what's your next hack?

Shanna

Okay, this one I'm going to say, I recognize that it's a bit bonkers, but it just it works in our house. So I'm going to put it out there. My kids love Parmesan cheese, the craft kind, well, any kind, but the craft kind, you know, that comes in a little plastic jar or whatever that you sprinkle out. And if they had their druthers, they would just sprinkle it until it is gone onto whatever, their pasta or whatever. I mean, especially Elle, right? I want some Parmesan. And the next thing you know, there's like three quarters cup Parmesan cheese on her plate. And that was driving me cuckoo. And so what I did was when we emptied a Parmesan container, I saved the empty one. I just kept it in my refrigerator. And now every time we have a meal that requires Parmesan cheese,

Laura

Yeah, but it gives them independence. You don't have to nag, but it also achieves what you want, which is not a lot of wasted Parmesan because grocery prices are insane right now, Shanna.

Shanna

Yes! Oh, trust me, I've been well aware of that. Yes. Yes, the independence. That's the main focus of this hack. Giving your kid a bit of independence.

Laura

I've been known to do that with the King's Hawaiian roll package. Like I will just keep an old one and move like three Hawaiian rolls into it, because otherwise my kids will eat like all 12 or 24, whatever comes in those packs. And I'll be like, oh, just three left. I guess we're going to have to eat something else for dinner tonight, guys.

Shanna

What I need to do is figure out a way to do this with salt. because my kids are salt beans. They will just straight up open their mouth, grind salt straight into it, lick it if I'm not watching. I'm like, get that out of your mouth.

Laura

Sebastian's like that. Sebastian, he goes, I like salt. He reaches for it. I have this salt well that Alton Brown influenced me to buy probably 20 years ago or something at this point. Anyway, it's like where you pinch it. It's like a pinch pot for salt or whatever. He will just lift open the lid and pinch a whole bunch and put it in his mouth. I'm like, kid. No. He goes, mm, I like salt. Oh, my God.

Shanna

Oh, my kids are the same. A pinch pot would be dangerous in my house. I think they would eat it by the teaspoon full if they could. Oh, man. Oh, man.

Laura

All right. So do you have another hack for us? I do. Okay. So this is one that in theory will be useful in my life coming up. I don't know if I've talked about it on the show, but I am working on a potty training book with Gia, my toddler and me instructor who we've had on the show multiple times. She is like a potty training master and she hooked up with me because she knew I was a writer. So we've been working on that and so we've been talking about potty training a lot and obviously Sebastian. You probably have guessed because I haven't talked about potty training on the show that he is yet to be potty trained right. So I'm paying attention to all these ideas that she is coming up with her potty training course and.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

But there's so many kids who've trained, you know, who've pooped standing up, right? Because they're in diapers.

Shanna

Ah, fascinating.

Laura

So I need to pay attention to this because this could be a thing that really like unlocks potty training, right? Especially for pooping. If your kid is a standard, you have to like switch them before you actually do the potty training because that's going to be like a huge hurdle to get over. So the pooping position. Observe your kid's pooping position. If you're going to be potty training, I'm popping my peas a lot here. Sorry, listeners. But yeah, just cluing into your kid's pooping position may help with potty training. That's the hack.

Shanna

So what do you do if they're a standard you like encourage them to do some squats?

Laura

I think so I think if you like notice they're about to start pooping you know because you can tell right they're making a face you like encourage them like you put like a book or even like an iPhone on the ground so that they have an incentive to squat down and look at it. whatever is their high value thing to sort of get their body used to getting in the sitting slash squatting position for pooping. That's the meeting.

Shanna

Well, you have to report back on that.

Laura

I know. I have to observe. The problem with Sebastian is he runs off to do it.

Shanna

Oh, yeah. When they go in hiding, it's hard to tell.

Laura

Yeah. He like goes off to the playroom and I'm like, oh, he's having such great independent play. And then he comes back. I'm like, oh, OK. I see what you're doing.

Shanna

Classic.

Laura

Yeah. All right, Shanna, another hack.

Shanna

Yeah, I have a little hack if your kid is worried about monsters in their room, under the bed or in the closet or something like that.

Laura

Mm-hmm. I'm like, I need this. My ears are perking up. Augie gets scared. He's like, to be fair, he has like stairs to the attic in his room. Like that's kind of scary. I would have been scared of that as a kid.

Shanna

Yeah, that's interesting though, because it's not inherently scary. What do you think is scary about it for him?

Laura

I don't know. I think there must be some kind of like... default fear of like addicts and basements for humans. And I don't know why because it's like, you know, it's kind of universal, isn't it? And I try to tell them like, oh, there's nothing scary up there and we've gone to see it. But I don't know, it is a narrow, dark stairway up to a dark door that you can like kind of see around the edge of like the patch door. It's, I don't know. It just, I can see where your brain could run wild with that, especially in the middle of the night.

Shanna

Yeah, true, true, true. Because you know, kids also imagine monsters in their closet and stuff. So it's a very closety. I get that. So one thing I've tried with Cece is if she's saying she's thinking about a monster, there's something in her room, I say, OK, well, let's think about things that make that monster look silly. And what if that monster has floofy pink poodle hair or balloons tied to his nose and just start throwing out like really silly ideas to start getting their mind thinking about this monster in a silly way. And then I encourage her to think of some of her own. So she'll start being like, oh, he's wearing pants with pug faces on it or a shirt with poodle heads. I don't know why poodle fluff for some reason is very hilarious in my house. And so you're throwing out all these really silly ideas.

Laura

I like that. I feel like that's sort of the monster version of if you have stage fright, imagine everyone in their underwear or whatever.

Shanna

Yeah. Yeah. Something that makes it less scary and kind of silly.

Laura

Yeah, hijack the visual. I really like that. I wonder if it would work with Augie because I don't know if he's afraid of a specific, you know, like, but I'm going to try this. I'm definitely going to try this.

Shanna

Okay. Yeah. I hope it works. All right. Do you have another one for us?

Laura

You know, I have one more. I think you do too, right? I do. What do you say we do them after the break? Oh, I think we should.

Shanna

We're back and we each have one more hack to share with you. Laura, what is your last, what the hack?

Laura

Okay, so this is something that might take a little practice and a lot of self-control. But it's something that I heard, I don't know, probably on TikTok or something. That's where I learned everything these days. And i've tried it and i have to say that it totally works and that is when you notice that everyone is escalating around you you know the tensions are high whining is happening voices are getting louder melting down is imminent get. Really quiet like do what you can to invert the energy that you're seeing. So you know in my house it's usually around bedtime and we have to turn off the TV or we have to stop playing with whatever we're doing and the kids are not happy with it.

Shanna

Yeah, that's the challenge for sure.

Laura

Yeah, yeah, but I challenge you to give it a try.

Shanna

Oh, you know I will because we get wild over here all the time and I'm constantly trying to bring that energy down. So I'm going to give it a whirl and see what happens.

Laura

Yeah. All right. We'll report back on that. Okay. You have one more hack for us?

Shanna

Yes. My last hack is a product that's been working really well in our house to keep things on track, and that is a visual timer. Have we talked about that before?

Laura

No, if we have, it's been a really, really long time, because I used to have one for Augie way back at the old house, but I haven't talked about it since. So let's talk about the visual timer.

Shanna

Okay, we've never had one before, but Steve's mom recently got one each for the girls, and it's just a small little square timer that you turn the knob and it shows time in a representation of like red like a different color. So if we want to set the timer for 15 minutes, I turn it, we see like a quarter circle of red and as the time ticks down the red. You slowly grow slower and slower and slower until the timer goes off and it's like a visual way of keeping track of time and knowing how much time you have left to do something as you know transitions in my house are a struggle getting out of the house doing things like brushing teeth hair before bed all that stuff. And I've noticed that I lose track of time, too. And I get really amped up because I get worried about, like, we're going to be late or whatever. And I am not on track with time either.

Laura

I love that. I also love that it's helping you. Like I don't think I would have thought of the visual timer having a positive effect for the parents, but that makes so much sense. Cause like when you're looking at the time and thinking, we've got five minutes, we've got three minutes, that little bit of arithmetic you have to do to figure out what time it is. Is taxing on your CPU right like you have to do that little calculation every time you don't drive me nuts is I use my microwave clock like it's the easiest one to see when I'm in the kitchen but if you stop the microwave before it's done like say for example Corey is heating up a coffee and he wants to do it for 50 seconds instead of a minute but he sets it for a minute and then takes it out. If you don't hit clear, the time doesn't come back up. It just says 10 seconds. And so so many times I'll be like cooking.

Shanna

Yes, the quick glance is very reassuring and I'm taking it all over the house. Like it's at the dinner table and we're like setting time for meals because meals have gotten kind of out of control. Like either they're lasting too long or too quick, you know, in the bathroom. I've put it on my desk to work like tasks that are tricky to get started. I'm like, all right, I'm going to set that to 10 minutes and just get going. And I'm finding it extremely helpful. I really, really love it.

Laura

I need to get one. The one we had definitely broke because Augie was playing with it too much in the pandemic, but I'm going to get a new one, I think.

Shanna

Yeah, I definitely encourage you to do so. There are lots to choose from on Amazon.

Laura

Awesome. Okay, I will report back on how it works in our house.

Shanna

Yay. And I think that's it for our hacks. Shall we move on to our BFPs and BFNs?

Laura

Let's do it.

Shanna

Well, despite the challenging week, I do have a BFP. Yay. Yay. And that is my mother-in-law. She really came through and helped out so much while Steve was in the hospital. That first night that he went down to Santa Monica, she went with him, like I mentioned before, and was there for hours with him. And she's been watching the girls so I can go down and visit him. And she's so great. She always has like art activities and like fun projects to do with the girls. I came home and it was so cute. There were these little art pieces on the table. And what she had done is take them outside to collect little pieces of nature leaves and sticks and stuff to come inside and then make compositions with them. Not even glued down or anything. She's like, I saw this on Instagram and I thought it was so cool.

Laura

Okay, let's see. I love that their grandma is out Pinterest momming you and me together. Look, she's like on it. Oh, 100%. 100%.

Shanna

She's so great with that stuff.

Laura

All right. Oh, this is so pretty. Oh, these are both so cool. Okay. So the first one is more abstract. There's like a big stick with some bougainvillea petals around it and some smaller leaves all scattered about. This would make like a really nice wallpaper, I feel like.

Shanna

Yeah. Isn't that pretty? That's Elle's composition. So pretty.

Laura

I love it. Okay. And then the next one is a little bit more representative. I'd say it looks almost creature-like. We've got some, what are those like rocks and acorn hats? I think so. Yeah. Yeah. Around a long leaf and some sticks that look kind of leg-like. Oh, this is so cool.

Shanna

So I just, I love that his mom is so supportive. You know, she's there to help out in whatever way possible and also keeping the girls engaged in like such a nice artistic way. And I just love her so much. And I'm so grateful that she is in town right now when this happened. Cause otherwise I don't know how I would have managed. Yeah. So she is my VIP BFP this week.

Laura

For sure. Yeah. That's amazing. I was so glad to hear she was in town, too, because it would have been too much.

Shanna

Yes.

Laura

Yes, it would have been very difficult. Yeah.

Shanna

All right. So that's mine. What do you got for us?

Laura

I have a BFP. Okay. And this is like a vindication for a mom fail that I experienced last year around Christmas time. You may remember the story of the time I whisked my children out of the bathtub so that they could go see Santa, but Santa had already passed a spy. Do you remember this?

Shanna

All right. You went to look out the window to see some sort of Santa in a cop car parade of sorts.

Laura

Yeah. Yeah. Glendale has a very unique tradition of they call it SWAT Santa. Right. It's when the Glendale Police Department gets a bunch of their cars and motorcycles out and escorts Santa through the streets of Glendale as he rides through like the SWAT tank basically he's like in the hatch like out the top. Right. Yes. And they have this elaborate pathway like they do all these different areas of Glendale on different nights and like it was hard to figure out where he'd be at what time. And last year I fucked it up. Last year I knew that he might be coming by like on the street just a half block away and I didn't really plan it properly and I heard him coming and whisked the kids out and we missed it and then the kids were really sad. Mm-hmm. So this year I was determined. I was like, we're gonna see Swat Santa.

Shanna

I'm hoping this video answers my questions

Laura

Well, thankfully, the rain had really died down by this point, so it was kind of just a drizzle. Oh, good. OK, good.

Shanna

That is fabulous. I can definitely see that it's drizzling. Santa comes by, waves directly at your kids and says that he loves their rain jacket. So there's some personal attention there. And how exciting.

Laura

I mean, we were the only ones on that half block at least. So yes, I would hope there'd be some personal attention.

Shanna

I was going to say Glendale did not come out in force for Swat Santa. I noticed that.

Laura

But also, he goes down like Every street it let me send you a quick screenshot of the path because this year it was a little easier instead of just like writing out Oh, I'm gonna be going left on Glendale right on Kenneth blah blah like they actually put a map out and it's Imagine that pretty elaborate. I'm gonna send it to you I also have to say I never expected to be so engaged with the Glendale police department's Instagram account like I'm following comments I'm asking people like where is he now and people are asking me to like tag them when he goes by and Well, Santa works miracles, Laura. Okay, so this map I'm going to send you is just one of the four nights that he did it.

Shanna

Goodness gracious. That looks like a complicated maze in one of my kid's bluey workbooks. That's something else.

Laura

It really is. So we got to see Swat Santa this year though, and it was a big win. And I did post it to my Instagram and people were like, is this real? Yeah. Yeah. It is a little bit surprising. It is. It is. It's very unique. So, yeah, that was our BFP, and I think that is our show. I think it is. Wait, unless you have a five-star review to read.

Shanna

Oh, yeah. This review is from a user called alsoLaura. I love it. This isn't from you, right, Laura? It's not. I swear. OK, OK. The title is Wonderful Positive Thoughts for Pregnancy, Five Stars. Pregnancy is a scary time. It has been wonderfully reassuring to listen to Shanna and Laura's experience as they navigate their pregnancies. I started with episode one since I'm currently pregnant and feel such camaraderie. Starting the show years later is also so helpful because I get to listen to their experiences of the newborn phase. I'm terrified, and I'm finding their perspectives make me feel like I can do it. Thank you, Shanna and Laura, for sharing positive ways and tips and book recs to survive pregnancy and new babies.

Laura

Well, thank you also, Laura. First of all, your name is wonderful. And congrats on your pregnancy, and you will do great, I'm sure, in the newborn phase.

Shanna

Absolutely. Thank you so much for leaving that review for us. And listeners, if you haven't had a chance yet to leave us a five-star review, could you please do us a favor and head on over to Apple Podcasts, leave five stars, say a few things you love about the show, and we might read it on an upcoming episode. If you have any hacks that you want to share with us, you know we would love to hear them. Laura, where can everyone reach us?

Laura

We are on TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook at BFP Podcast. We have a website, BigBatPositivePodcast.com. And if you want to send us an email, you can always throw a voice memo in there. We love those. Just send it to contact at BigBatPositivePodcast.com. And finally, if you want to get some exclusive content from me and Shanna, and you want to join the coolest group of people on the internet, just search Facebook for Big Fat Positive Community. It's a private group, so you have to request a join, and you have to answer those two membership questions so we know you're not a robot. But if you do those two things, you'll get sent straight through to all the wonderful conversations we're having in there.

Shanna

Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Thanks for listening, everyone. Have a big, fat, positive week. Bye. Bye.