Laura’s Life-Changing Mom Hack (Plus Kids’ Art Storage) – Ep. 255

Shanna

Hi, welcome to Big Fat Positive with Sean and Laura. On this week's episode, we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, What The Hack, where we share our best parenting tips that'll help your day-to-day life. And Laura shares one big hack that she swears has changed her life. And we wrap it up with our weekly BFPs and BFNs. Let's get started.

Laura

Nothing is better for a podcast than construction noises. Drills, hammering, all that jazz. Enjoy the dulcet tones of a screwdriver.

Shanna

Um, you picked the quietest tool.

Laura

I know. Why did I do that? Look, I'm tired.

Shanna

All right. All right. All right. All right. That's your disclaimer. All right, friend. How are you? How is everything in your world?

Laura

Well, things are definitely better than last week. If you recall last week, we were sick over here and by we, I mean me and Augie. And I'm happy to report that we're all feeling much better. The antibiotics are working great. And Augie is also like Doing so great on his sticker chart to finish his antibiotics. Yeah, did he succeed? Well, he is working very diligently, but he has one more day left. Monday is his last day of taking the antibiotics. So he is very excited to go to Target after school tomorrow.

Shanna

Good job, Mike.

Laura

So I will report back on that. But what I really wanted to talk about my check in this week was little Sebastian, my little two year old. All right. So we all know everyone who's had a toddler or lives in this world and has heard about the terrible twos knows that something happens when your kids turn two, they start getting like a lot more. aware of the world and aware of their own feelings and emotions and aware of how to use those feelings and emotions to express themselves and to maybe control situations around them. And we are starting to feel that full force over here. It's just like all of a sudden it's become very clear that instead of him sort of having his emotions pass over him quickly, like if he's starting to feel frustrated, he'll get frustrated and then he'll get over it. Things are sticking a little bit more over here.

Shanna

Oh, wow.

Laura

And I'm just looking at him. I'm like, oh, baby. Oh, such a big feeling. What are we going to do? What are we going to do? And then, you know, times like that where it's so over the top, it is sort of, it does give you a perspective because you're just like, oh, my gosh, they're not in control, right?

Shanna

Mm-hmm.

Laura

But there's also these more nuanced times that sort of come out of nowhere. Like, for instance, when he and Augie are happily playing together, but then there's a toy conflict, you know, like they both want the same toy. The other night at dinner. Cory and I were continuing to eat our dinner after the boys had like had their two minutes of sitting still time and ran off, right? So in our house now, like the pattern is that like we will all try to sit down to eat together and then they'll usually last a couple of minutes and then like they'll scarf their food down and then want to go play. And we've evolved to the point where like we don't force them to sit but we do say like, if you're going to play, go play in the playroom. Mommy and daddy are trying to enjoy our dinner, which is like a thing I've sort of

Shanna

Wow, Sebastian really went for it. That just feels like animalistic, like cheetah level. Like I'm gonna bite whatever I can get my teeth into. Like usually you bite like an arm or a finger or whatever is like sticking out. But he was just like, no, right in the back.

Laura

Oh, yeah, like Mike Tyson, Evander Holyfield stuff, like it just like go for it. So anyway, I don't have any solutions. I am just kind of in the thick of it right now. And I'm realizing that I need to do like some capital P parenting with Sebastian to start talking about his, you know, big feelings and how to deal with them and how to manage them and all that stuff. But I keep forgetting.

Shanna

To do parenting happens with the second kid man I feel like that is just like the story of my life right now it's like oh yeah I need to get around to like helping the second kid work through shit like oops.

Laura

Well it's just like literally the time in the day is not there like I need to I know I need to make the time but it's just I do not remember during the calm time to be like oh this is the time where I could do the play thing where, you know, little Spider-Man toy bites Marshall from Paw Patrol and they have a little conflict about it, you know, like, I don't remember to do that. I just was like, ah, quiet.

Shanna

You just want to enjoy it. You don't want to bring it back up again. Like what new emotions are they going to spill forth when you discuss this stuff? That's what I'm always afraid of.

Laura

I know. And logically, I know it's a good thing, but emotionally, you're just tired and you just want to enjoy yourself. So anyway, that's where I'm at right now. There's no nice bow to put on top of this. I just wanted to introduce this as a topic because I have a feeling it's going to come back up, Shanna.

Shanna

I think so, maybe every day. Every day for the next year, at least.

Laura

Oh man.

Shanna

Good luck, friend.

Laura

Thank you, thank you. Anyway, I'm gonna be leaning hard on you these days because I know you have a lot of experience with this. But in the meantime, I just wanna hear your check-in. Maybe it wasn't traumatic, like mine.

Shanna

Actually, not too much notable has happened this week. But as a result, I've been kind of reflective and thinking about parenting and my kids and stuff. And what has come to mind is the fact that the kids are getting older, obviously. But what really stands out is that L is getting to the age where I really started remembering my childhood, right? Like when I think back on my life of like, oh, I had a great childhood, I think of about maybe six years old to 18, right? Like to the end of high school. And I've been doing all this work for years and even still with CeCe, right? Laying this foundation of, you know, love and kindness and good parenting and all this stuff. And I'm just like, Oh my God, they're not even going to remember most of this. Like now is when it's really starting. Like the real memories are forming. And I kind of panicked about that.

Laura

It's almost like the first, you know, four to five years are like defensive parenting. Like you're just like problems coming at you and you're just swatting them away as best you can. It's like you're in that game, that old arcade game Centipede, and you're just like trying to get all the like everything shot away from you as quickly as possible. And then when they get older and a little more self-sufficient, it's like, oh, so now I actually have to like come up with things. Yeah.

Shanna

Yeah, I actually now have to create an interesting road trip for them instead of just like defensively driving through the city, watching out for pedestrians. Yeah, and another change that's happening as they get older is changes in our routine that I've held very tightly to my routine for all of these years, especially like night time and bedtime, right? But Elle's getting to an age where like after school activities are starting later in the evening and I'm finding myself being like, excuse me, what? Like self practice starts at 6 p.m. No, like that's encroaching on bedtime and you know, we talked to other parents at these practices and they're like, what time does your kid go to bed? And we're like, oh, you know, around seven, seven, 30. And they're like, what? Oh my God, our kids go to bed at like nine, nine, 30.

Laura

I'm still not on board with like a 6 p.m. start time for a practice or something. You know, one thing that Gia recommends in her classes is, you know, we talk about sleep a lot. And I'm referring to Gia Gambaro Blunt, who has been on our show a couple times, who is like my parenting. But she says that one thing that you can start building in when your kids are younger is like quiet alone time in their bed before lights out, before they go to sleep. And she actually recommends you do this with like toddlers so that it's like built in. Because she says that we don't fall asleep the minute we get into bed, right? We read a book or do a crossword puzzle or look at our phone or something, right? We do something in bed to wind down before we actually turn the lights off and close your eyes.

Shanna

Yeah. I need that time to watch TV. Let's be honest.

Laura

But yeah, and talk to Steve and just not be a parent for a little bit.

Shanna

Yeah Yeah, those late practices are really tough this softball season with CECE being on the team and being four years old Some of the practices like we missed a ton of them with CECE like L would go but CECE just can't like the end of a long day she's It's just prime time for tantrums and melting down and she's not all there for those evening things. So for four year olds, I'm definitely like a hard no. But I'm coming around to being okay with some of that stuff for the older kid. And the other thing I'm noticing about kids getting older is that they're aging out of a lot of like the toys that I've been offering them for years and the activities that we've been doing, you know, warm weather is coming up again in spring and I've been used to setting up like a little table outside and like, let's, you know, splash in the water. And it's just not interesting to them anymore.

Laura

Here's a question, though. If you told them, I'm getting rid of the water table, would they lose their minds? Probably. Yes, probably. No, it's my favorite thing in the whole world. You could possibly get rid of this thing that I haven't touched in six months.

Shanna

Yeah, same with that little ride on roller coaster we have back there. Oh boy. Elle is so big on that thing, you know, her knees like splay out and like hit walls as she goes down, but oh, dare I get rid of it? No, no, no, no. Yeah, parenting changes as your kids age. Imagine that, Laura.

Laura

Imagine that. Well, you know what though, this bodes well for the longevity of our podcast because it turns out that the stories are not going to end, the challenges are not going to end. Okay so with your new revelation have you like come up with a plan to make your children's childhood the most magical thing in the whole world ever and they'll always look back on it with fond memories and nothing's add ever.

Shanna

Oh boy, that's, wow, that's pressure. No pressure. Look, the things that I loved about my childhood were like a lot of fun, free playtime, outside time sports, you know, loving family, you know, just having my parents around and having them involved in my activities and stuff. So I'm going to keep up with like the sports and then, you know, being involved and being the team mom. I'm hoping to take some memorable vacations with them and just put memories in their head that are fond ones.

Laura

I think that's good. I like this idea of reflecting on what made your childhood happy and honing in on that because there's so many things that we could do. It's funny because you mentioned sports. For you was the thing that made your childhood happy. For me, it's the thing that made my childhood miserable. Yeah. Maybe not miserable, but I kind of hated like we did tennis and I'm glad I know how to play tennis But I hated like being dragged to tennis class all the time which sounds like such a privileged problem poor Laura was being dragged to tennis class But like it wasn't my jam right and so all it was was being forced to go to

Shanna

Yeah, that doesn't sound fun.

Laura

So yeah, like you said, like I remember a lot of the trips we took, you know, and just the core of that was like being with my family and my brother and all that stuff. Yeah.

Shanna

Yeah, parties, birthday parties, celebrations, you know, our entire childhoods don't stand out in our minds, right? It's like a general sense of love and support from your family, and then just like these memories here and there of like the really fun, wonderful things. I'll love them. I'll continue to love them, Laura. Oh, good. Yeah. Yes. Yes, that's part of the plan. And then I'll pepper their lives with fun, memorable activities. I think that's the plan. And $40,000 birthday parties because I'm in LA and that's what you're supposed to do here.

Laura

I saw that article.

Shanna

It's not normal. Yeah, no, no, no. I'll stick with our in-budget birthday parties, which are still a blast. And yeah, so that's pretty much my check-in this week, just a reflective check-in on how parenting is changing as my kids get older. OK, so do you think it's time for a special segment? Oh, I do.

Laura

All right, we are back in our special segment this week is what the heck where Shanna and I share some little tips and tricks that we've learned to help make parenting easier. Shanna, I think we should get right to it. We have lots of hacks to share. So tell me what's your first hack.

Shanna

My first hack is a way of getting my kids to do things without seeming like a nagging mom. This has been a little trick up my sleeve for a long time now. I can't believe I haven't done this before on what the hack. And it still works. Knock on wood. Is there any wood around? It still works with my kids. So let's say we're hanging out outside. The screen doors are closed. The bugs don't get in the house, et cetera. One of the kids goes inside to go potty. they inevitably like leave the doors open right they don't like shut the screen door so instead of saying I'll close the screen door or can you close the door please or just some kind of thing that might annoy them what I do is I go door alert door alert like I use the phrase alert. all the time to kind of just remind their brain, like, oh yeah, that's something I need to do.

Laura

Yeah. I've heard that like you should just use one word when you're trying to remind your kids to do things, especially younger kids where it's like shoes. Instead of be like, come over here and please put your shoes on. You just say shoes pants or whatever you know like to remind them so that their brain knows what's next but you don't like blah blah blah blah blah blah blah for everything because that's all they hear is blah blah blah the Charlie Brown like. Yes but I love adding the alert because it's like it makes it like a fun game then it's like oh no the spaceship is crashing door alert door alert.

Shanna

Yeah, exactly. And I think it empowers them to show like, oh, I know that. I know how to do that. And I can do it independently without a parent like instructing me to do it. Another instance that I use it a lot is at the dinner table. We have benches at our table and oh my gosh, they just, you know, they never want to stay seated. They will like to stand up at the bench. There's like a mirror nearby our table and they're looking at themselves in the mirror and blah, blah, blah. And often they fall off and stuff like it's dangerous. Instead of like, sit down, stop, you know, blah, blah, blah. I just say bench alert and boom, they sit down.

Laura

So I don't know. Try it out. Oh, I'm trying this out. I'm trying this out the minute the kids come home. Trust me. All right. Well, report back. Let us know how it works. Okay. I will. All right. What do you got for us? Okay. My first hack, I actually sent you a screenshot from one of my Facebook moms groups. Okay, someone posted this and I was just like, oh, this is so smart for little little kids like toddlers. Okay, so I'm sending you a screenshot of just the pictures from this post and then I'll describe what's going on.

Shanna

Okay, I see a small child about two years old with a milk jug like a gallon milk jug and a little cup. And here she is like stirring something in the cup. It's all on a metal surface. I'm not sure what's going on here. So please explain.

Laura

And so here's the description. Okay. If you haven't seen this toddler hack, it's amazing. Let your littles practice their pouring, mixing kitchen helper skills on the dishwasher door. It's a self-cleaning surface and a perfect height for them. And i was like oh and and they're right like so you open the dishwasher door and it's like a perfect little tray you know it's like shaped already to be a perfect little tray. Like they said self cleaning and just at a great height for them so i'm gonna try this i haven't tried it yet but i think it's gonna be fun. Also, I should mention I like totally googled whether it was safe to like put stuff on the dishwasher door because I was like, is this going to break it? And I don't want to break my brand new dishwasher. But apparently they're designed to like withstand hundreds of pounds because like, I don't know.

Shanna

OK, so you're saying I can use it as a step stool to reach the high cabinets.

Laura

I am not saying that, Shanna. Please do not quote me on this one.

Shanna

Cool. Thank you for the advice.

Laura

You did not hear that here first guys. We're just putting little light things on there. Anyway, um, because yeah, Sebastian's always wanting to like pour things, even Augie still. He's like, he wants to pour his water. He wants to do this and that. And I'm just like, Oh, it's going to make such a mess. And usually I just let him make a mess, but this way I can let him make a mess and not have to clean it up.

Shanna

So yeah, that is so brilliant. I love it. Okay, so what is your next hack? My next hack is for helping little kids blow their nose, which tissues have been an issue in our house for just ever. Like sometimes they just don't want to blow their nose into a tissue. It's just like they're walking around, they're like,

Laura

Like straight into the air. Augie literally cries if I suggest he blow his nose into a tissue. Like, you never want to. I'm like, what is wrong? Like why?

Shanna

I don't understand. So I had a hack before about like they blow into the tissue and you pretend like they're blowing it across the room, right? Yeah. So when that's worn out, it's welcome and not working anymore. Here's another idea. And this actually, my mother-in-law came up with this idea. So this is all to her credit. Tell your kid that it's a special tissue and that when they blow their nose into it, it will meow like a cat or whatever sound, you know, whatever funny little thing. So we tried this with a CECE and she blew her nose into the tissue. And when she blew her nose, I'm like, mew. And she cracked up. She was laughing so hard. She like kept wanting to use the tissue and blowing her nose. And I'm just like, meow. And it was a big success. We actually got her to use the tissues using this trick. Genius.

Laura

I mean, the first thing that comes to mind for me is farts. Like, can you blow your mind? Yes! OMG, that's brilliant. My boys will do anything to get a fart joke. Sneak a fart joke in, you know?

Shanna

Have you guys had Alexa do all the farts for you yet?

Laura

Oh my God, no. I'm going to save that for when we really need it. What do you do? What do you ask her?

Shanna

Oh, yeah. If you need a little entertainment with your kids, just say, Alexa fart and she'll do a fart and then she'll explain what kind of fart it is. Like, it'll be like, she's like, that was a juicy one. If you would like to hear a dolphin fart, say dolphin fart, or if you'd like to hear a random one, say random. And you can go on and on. Like, if you say random, she'll give you a dolphin fart. And then you can do, I don't know, high-pitched fart. It goes on and on. She's got quite the farting skills.

Laura

So that's hilarious. And yeah, I'm going to save that for when I really need it. But also, I feel like that might be a Pandora's box.

Shanna

Yes, yes, we've spent a lot of time listening to Alexa Fart. So definitely don't open that box if you're not ready to go there. All right, what's your next hack?

Laura

Okay, this hack I talked about a little bit on episode 246 in my check-in, but I wanted to make it a real hack because I didn't really elaborate on it. And that is, instead of buying wrapping paper for birthday gifts and holiday gifts, make your kids decorate their own using a roll of craft paper and markers or whatever other art supplies you have around. So what I like to do is I just have a big roll of craft paper and it doubles as an activity to keep your kids busy. It's adorable because you know who doesn't like some kid art right like it's a personalized wrapping paper. And it's cheaper than buying wrapping paper. So I'll just roll out a big length of craft paper, tape it down with some blue tape and let the kids go to town and then use that to wrap any boxes. So yeah, it takes care of two things at once. It gives your kids something to do.

Shanna

I love that idea. Here's how I see it going down in my house. I would set this all up. They would do it for one second and then be like, no, I don't want to. And then I need to finish it. And so then I'm left scribbling all over it as if I were the kid decorating it and then wrap with it. I feel like that's how it would go.

Laura

Well, here's the thing. You like art, so you would probably love this shit, right? Like, oh, an opportunity to do some drawing that I just have to do because I'm obligated to make this pretty. So I'm just going to throw that out there. Second of all, just like plain craft paper as a wrapping paper is like actually kind of cute. Throw a little bow on it or something or draw a little bow. And, you know, no one gives a shit about wrapping paper, right? Like no one's like, wow, I can't wait to save this wrap. Well, OK, there are people who like to save wrapping paper, but no kids. But no kids I've ever met are like, ooh, I'm going to preserve the wrapping on this box. I don't care about the toy inside at all. Okay, you have another one for us.

Shanna

I love this next one for getting conversation started at the dinner table. But really, it could be anywhere where you want to talk with your kids and your family. Obviously, this is going to be for more verbal kids, a little bit older, but it does work with CC2. You play the one truth and one lie game, kind of like we do with mom confessions, right? We come up with one true mom confession, one lie and Whatever. It's like a fun conversation starter. And it's a great way to get a little window into their world because they've got to come up with something true to tell you about their day or whatever. And then it's really funny to see what they come up with as lies. So I did this recently at the dinner table and Elle loved it. She was so excited to play this game. She wanted to do it a couple of times. She wanted everyone around the table to do it.

Laura

That's really funny. I obviously need to wait a couple of years for this to really work, especially with Sebastian. I have noticed Augie's really like getting more nuanced with lies. You know, I feel like when they're like two and a half or three, they start to like actually lie about things like Sebastian right now. He's not even two and a half, but I'll be like, did you have a poo poo and he'll look at me and go. No. And he knows that's a lie, right? But it's not a very sophisticated one. But Augie's lies are getting real sophisticated and he's starting to really make stuff up. However, he has the biggest tells. He's so obvious. He does this thing when he lies now where he

Shanna

So obvious, man. I have an example of one of the truths and lies that Cece did at the table. Cece?

Laura

OK. I want to hear.

Shanna

Yeah. Yeah. She got into it, too. So here are the two things she told me. OK. And you guess which one is the truth. OK. OK. So the first thing she said was, I took a picture of Sasha. Which is our dog. The second thing she said was, I saw 10 cats sitting on a wall and they were pooping and I took a picture of them and then I colored that picture.

Laura

This is tough. This is tough. Then she like whips out the picture and she's like, see, see.

Shanna

I printed it by myself and call it a day. So, you know, it was hilarious and just, it was a fun time. So it's got older kids who like to chit chat, give that one a try. What's your next hack?

Laura

Okay, this is a tooth brushing hack. I know that you have historically provided most of these, but I've learned a new one I want to share. This is especially for little kids, but it's actually working with Augie a little bit too, because it's like new and fun, which is one, two, three away. So what you do is you pick a number and you tell them, okay, we're going to do one, two, three and away. And while you brush, you count, you go one, two, three away. And you bring the toothbrush away. And obviously I'm doing this more with my two year old than my four year old. Four-year-old surprisingly likes it more than you'd think. And then they laugh because it's like flying away, right? And then you're like, okay, do you think we can get to four this time? Okay. One, two, three, four, away. And it just gives them a break, which is really nice.

Shanna

Oh, that's so cute. Does Augie brush his own teeth or do you brush his teeth?

Laura

I still brush his teeth. He can brush his own teeth. He does not want to, right? Oh, OK. So every once in a while, he'll be like, I'll finish it. But he doesn't want to. So the big win so far is I'll get him to feel around with his tongue and tell me where it feels fuzzy still or if there's food. He'll be like, oh, there's something back there. And I'll be like, OK, I'll get it. Does Cece brush her own teeth?

Shanna

Oh, yeah. I brush it sometimes, but she's just like very much like, I want to do it. I want to do it. And the worry there is like, oh, is she doing it well enough? Like, I hope she's doing okay. But we keep getting like good marks from the dentist. So that's fine with me. They're practice teeth anyway. Exactly.

Laura

Okay, what's your next one?

Shanna

All right, this is a phone number learning hack. If you're trying to teach your little one to memorize your phone number. I think I got this from TikTok or from a mom's group. They posted a tick. I honestly don't remember where this came from. And I haven't used it because I taught my kids my phone number in a different way. by putting it to the Paw Patrol theme song. But I've always thought this is a really great idea, especially for kids who use iPads. Make your phone number the passcode for them to get into the iPad.

Laura

Oh, can you make it that long? I don't know.

Shanna

I guess so.

Laura

All right, so are you going to do this?

Shanna

Well, they already know the phone number. But you know what? We could teach them Steve's number like this. Oh, there you go. So yeah, maybe I will give it a whirl. Because they're very motivated to get into those iPads, you know? It will be tricky to learn that number, but they will get it lickety-split. All right, what's your next hack?

Laura

Okay, my next hack is something I wish I had known, like, million years ago. Did you know you don't have to cook pasta in a giant pot of boiling water?

Shanna

Um, maybe? I'm not sure what you're getting at here, but I don't always use giant pots.

Laura

Okay, let me rephrase. Actually, let me just say this. Did you know that you can cook pasta in a skillet with like an inch of water?

Shanna

Oh, OK, I have used small pots with small amounts of water, but I don't know that I've ever done it in a skillet.

Laura

OK, so cooking pasta in a skillet is my new, like, fastest, quickest way to get any, like, quick little portions of pasta done. Works really well with spaghetti. You usually have to break it in half. But basically, you just put the pasta in. with cold water in a skillet. You don't have to get a boiling first or anything. Cover it with just a little bit of extra water on top and you can top it off with extra water if needed, right? Like if it starts getting too low or too dry and then you just bring it up to a boil and cook it until it's done and you don't have to drain the water. You don't have like, and it's, it's fine, Shanna. Like you think, oh, it's gonna be gummy and that's not gonna work. Nope, it works just fine. I've done it with egg noodles. I've done it with I've done it with spaghetti. I've done it with penne. And it actually even makes like sauces better.

Shanna

Well, that's so brilliant because then you don't have to wait for all of that water to boil. Like if you're trying to do something quick, just get it going.

Laura

Well, we're all like, especially kids who like noodles and butter, right? They're like, I'm hungry. And you're like, oh, fuck, it's going to take like 15 minutes to get the water up to a boil. And then I'm going to have to cook the pasta. And then I'm going to have to eat. No, you don't have to do that. It cuts out like at least half the time.

Shanna

Nice. I love the smart smart.

Laura

OK, so do you have another hack for us?

Shanna

I do, but I think we should take a little break and come back with our last couple hacks.

Laura

OK, sounds like a plan.

Shanna

Okay, I don't know how life changing it is, but you know, it's a helpful little tidbit. You know how our kids make a lot of art, bring a ton of art home, and there's always that conundrum of like, what to do with the art? Like, do I display it? How long do I display it? What do I do? Do I save it? Oh, yeah, yeah. And taking a picture of it is obviously a great idea, a way to preserve a nice little piece of art. And then you can toss the art when the kid's not looking. But what I discovered is that a great way to display that art is to take a picture of it and then send it to your digital picture frame. So their little art pieces cycle through in our picture frame in the living room.

Laura

It's so obvious. It's so obvious, and yet it never occurred to me to this moment to do that. That is so smart. And I imagine they get super excited to see their art on the digital picture frame because my kids get so excited to see their own pictures, like their faces on the digital picture frames.

Shanna

Yeah, and I'm all about displaying their work. Before I had kids, I was like, I don't want to clutter up my fridge or whatever with paper and stuff, but I'm like, it's a source of pride to put up their work, you know, whether it's schoolwork or artwork or whatever. And it's just a nice way of doing that and preserving those memories and that work without having to, you know, save every single piece of paper.

Laura

Yeah, we currently have a big pile of papers because I don't know what to do with them. And we put them up to it. It's so cute seeing how proud they are when you put it up on the wall, though, like, and they'll come back to it like days, weeks later and be like, I made that and like tell you about how what they were doing when they made it. It's just, oh, it's so cute. It's so cute. our house is just like all kinds of like kid scribbles all over the walls, you know, like we don't have real art. We have, well, it is real art, I should say. We have nascent art on the wall.

Shanna

And to be fair, I have a lot of that stuff still hanging up too. Like I still have tons of papers, you know, on the fridge and we put them on the sliding door and everything because there's something to be said for that too. But Then you can take a picture of it and then put it on the digital frame and I'll live there forever. Super fun. All right.

Laura

What do you got for us? Okay. Mine is a product that I actually mentioned on our Facebook community group, the BFP community group. And like just to help someone who is like, I don't know what to do. And I mentioned this product and they're like, how come you've never talked about this on the show? I was like, okay, I guess I should help you all out with this thing. The post was about how her baby monitor and other electronics in her baby's room put off such bright LED lights. They all have these little indicator lights and how all kinds of electronics have little indicator lights, like a router, right? Will she have all the indicator lights? And if you're trying to sleep, that stuff really can disturb you. And as you know, I've been a zealot in the past about making sure rooms are pitch black for my kids.

Shanna

I had no idea those existed. So thank you for the tip.

Laura

All right, I think we have one more each, right?

Shanna

Do you have one more to share with us? My last one I learned from a discussion in one of my mom's groups on Facebook, and I haven't used it yet because I haven't had to do eyedrops with my kids in a while. The last time Elle had pink eye was a few years ago and getting eye drops in her eyes was very tricky, right? Like she was really scared to open her eye and have it go in. And I was like bribing her with M&Ms and all that stuff. So what I learned is that the kids do not have to open their eyes for you to put eye drops in. Yes, that's why all these people in this thread were like, oh yeah, my doctor or my optimologist said it doesn't matter if the eye is open or not. Just have them lie there, close their eye, put the drop kind of in the corner of their inner corner of their eye and have them blink around and that's fine.

Laura

Yeah, because I haven't had to do that with my kids. There's no way either of them would let me do this easily. So, wow, that's a hot tip.

Shanna

Like I said, I haven't tried it yet. So I don't know how much easier it will be, but I just imagine it would be right because so much of it is the anticipation of like having to hold their little eye open and they see it coming down and Just tell them to lie there and relax and then like, I think that will be a lot easier. So listeners, try that and let us know if it works well for you.

Laura

And make sure you check with your doctor that this is okay because maybe it's okay for some drops and not others. So like, yes, make sure you check. Yes, definitely. All right. What's your last one, Laura? Okay. When I say that this last hack has changed my life, I mean it. Shanna. I mean it. Okay. This is a tip I heard somewhere on TikTok. It's lost to the TikTok algorithm. I couldn't find it again. But I made a mental note of it and I've used it. And it is truly amazing. The tip was when you are playing with your kids and they're doing imaginative play, which is something that's all Aki wants to do. He's always in his fantasy worlds and roping us into his imaginative play, right? Mm-hmm. All you have to do is repeat what they say back to them. You don't have to come up with storylines. You don't have to respond to what they say. All you have to do is repeat back what they just said.

Shanna

not real like bedtime.

Laura

Pretend bedtime?

Shanna

Yes. Okay. So he's, he's into it. It doesn't break the fantasy world. What's the benefit like to the parent of doing this as opposed to offering storylines or trying to engage more deeply? Pure laziness, Shanna.

Laura

It was bedtime. It was bedtime and I was tired. And here's the thing also, I feel like I've tried the yes and technique with Augie when he's in his fantasy world. You know, he'll be like, Joy, here's your backpack. Uh, you need to fill it up. I'll be like, yes, and I need to put all the memories in it. He'll be like, no, no, no, no, no, that's not what's going on. Like it pulls him out because whatever I have in my mind is not the very specific thing he has in his mind. So it makes it like a conflict. He gets upset and he starts going, no, no, no. And he like starts being like a director. I mean, he's obviously a director in this, but it's like, it gets annoying for me and for him. But by just repeating back what he said, sometimes you can phrase it back as a question, right? He was like, put it in the backpack. I'll be like, put it in the backpack.

Shanna

Awesome. Yeah, there's just so much. No, no, you're doing it wrong with CECE, you know, when I try to do stuff. It is exhausting. I remember with Elle, like just, oh my gosh, having to come up with so many Paw Patrol scenarios, like Mayor Humdinger was stealing the pancakes and blah, blah, blah. And this was like, oh my goodness. I'm not being paid to write these stories, damn it.

Laura

Yes, you don't want to be doing any unpaid work.

Shanna

That's all parenting is, Laura. I don't know if you have noticed, but yeah, I know what you're getting at. Well, that's such an awesome hack. I'm definitely going to use that with CECE in particular. And maybe I'll just teach L to do that too, because when they play pretend together, my God, all they do is like bicker about what's going on. There's like, no, yes, and it's all like, no, you're doing this wrong. No, you're doing this wrong.

Laura

So maybe she can get on board, too. On that note, though, I think we are done with this segment. We are done with our hacks and it's time to move on to our BFPs and BFNs.

Shanna

All right.

Laura

And it's just that right now, Augie is like in such a sweet phase. Like I don't know what it is. I don't know if it's going to stick around, but he is in like a lovey-dovey cuddly affectionate phase and I am here for it.

Shanna

Oh, I love that. Oh, four-year-old lovey-dovey. Oh, it's the best.

Laura

It's so cute. So he'll just like be doing whatever, like playing by himself or like puttering around the house and he'll just stop and go, mama. And I'll go, yes, honey. Go, I love you. Just out of the blue and I'll be like, oh honey, I love you so much. And then the other thing he's been wanting to do a lot is just snuggles. He'll be like, mama snuggles. And I'll be like, oh yes, okay, we definitely need to have a snuggle. And his new thing is he's repeating back what I've told him a bunch of times, which is I've told him like, oh, I never say no to a snuggle. Like you can always ask for a snuggle for me. So he'll be like, mama snuggle. And I'll be like, okay, yeah, let's have a snuggle. And I was like, you never say no to a snuggle. Even if you're cooking, you stop and you have a snuggle. I'm like, that is right. That is right. I will always stop for a snuggle.

Shanna

All right. Yeah, me too.

Laura

What about you? Do you have a BFP or a BFN?

Shanna

I have a BFP. Oh, good. My BFP is that Nana and Pop Pop were in town this weekend. So my mom and stepdad. And we just had like a really fun weekend. I on Friday, the girls were at school and my mom and I went for a hike and like, you know, has been raining. So the hills are just like, full of like flowers and green grass and it's beautiful. And I took her to play pickleball. We played a little pickleball together and that was very fun. And on Saturday, my mom and I and the girls went to the beach and had a girls beach day together and it was a blast. Just like a lot of fun stuff. I love having my mom in town and it was a great weekend.

Laura

That's nice to hear. You guys missed so much with the pandemic, so I'm glad she is able to come out more these days. I know. Me too. Me too. I love her. Love you, mom. It's been too long since I've seen your mom, though. I haven't seen your mom in forever. So next time she's in town, stop being so selfish and share some Nana with us.

Shanna

Oh, OK. Well, you can come play pickleball with us, Laura. Sports, pickleball.

Laura

I know you want to. I would like pickleball. Cory is very reluctant with pickleball. I feel like he is a little salty that they're taking over tennis courts. Yeah, I get that. But maybe pickleball is the thing I need because I had such a traumatic tennis experience as a kid. Maybe I just needed it to be smaller.

Shanna

Yes, and not on a 110 degree day. We'll go on a cool day. Oh boy. Yeah. But yeah, so that's mine. And I think that's it for our show. But do you have a five star review to read?

Laura

Yes, we have another wonderful five star review. This one is from Week 10V on Apple Podcasts. They say, overdo review five stars. I became pregnant in 2020 and turned to the podcast world for some desperately sought advice and I am so glad I found Shanna and Laura. I am still listening and I've learned and laughed a ton. Thank you both for what you do. You sound like two wonderful women and I appreciate the insight. Well, thank you.

Shanna

Aww, thank you so much. That's such a sweet review. And listeners, if you haven't had a chance yet to leave us a five-star review, could you please do us a favor and head on over to Apple Podcast, leave us those five stars, say a few things you love about the show, and we might read it on an upcoming episode. And if you have any parenting hacks you want to share with us, you know we would love to hear them. Laura, where can everyone find us?

Laura

We're on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok at BFB Podcast. We have a website, bigfapositivepodcast.com. If you want to send us an email, you can always throw a voice memo in there. We love those. Send it to contact at bigfapositivepodcast.com. And finally, if you want to join the coolest group of people on the internet, just search Facebook for Big Fat Positive Community. It's a private group, so you have to request to join. Answer those two membership questions so we know you're not a robot, and then you'll get sent straight through to all the wonderful, amazing conversations we're having in there. Not just about LED light-blocking stickers, but also all kinds of interesting and wonderful topics.

Shanna

Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Thanks for listening, everyone. Bye. Bye.