Shanna’s Mystery Package: A Whodunit – Ep. 220

Laura

Welcome to BigBatPosit with Shanna and Laura. This week we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, Internet Insanity, where things crash, crack, and creep us out. And we close with our BFPs and BFNs. Let's get started. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the show. It's episode 220. Hello, Shanna. Hello. I feel like my birthday is the 22nd, so I always like seeing two-two next to each other.

Shanna

It's a nice round number. Good, solid. Yeah, I like it. It's good.

Laura

Yes. OK, so this isn't a numerology podcast, though. This is a pregnancy and parenting podcast, so. True, OK. It begs the question, what have you been up to in your parenting this week? How are those girls?

Shanna

They are fine. I am starting my check-in today with a bit of a mystery.

Laura

Ooh, okay.

Shanna

The other day I came home and there was an Amazon package on her porch, which of course made me excited because I love receiving packages, especially when I don't remember ordering them. I'm like, maybe Steve ordered something. Like, I don't know, you know, it's exciting. So I bring it inside and I open it up and what it is is a box set of something called tile mate essentials. Do you know what tiles are, Laura?

Laura

Tiles. Well, I know tiles that you put on the ground. I know tiles are like there's the tile device that you can attach to your keys so that you don't lose your keys.

Shanna

Yes. Is that the one? Yes, that's the one. And we have a few tiles. I have one on my keys. I haven't used it in ages. I think I lost connection to it ages ago and it's just like a key chain now. But the other day, we were talking about it, like, oh, I should reconnect my tile. And so I was like, oh, Steve bought some tile things. Okay, interesting. And he got home and I was like, hey, that's cool. You bought this tile kit. He's like, I didn't buy that. And I was like, oh, you didn't because I didn't buy that. And we're like, oh, that's weird. Maybe it's one of those Amazon scams, right? Because sometimes... Oh, yeah. A company will send you something so that they can like claim it was a real purchase and then do a fake review. Have you heard of this scam?

Laura

Not only have I heard of the scam, I know someone who has been a victim of the scam and they are just getting like box upon box of, how would you put it? Sexual wellness products. Oh! Battery operated sexual wellness products.

Shanna

That's so specific. Very specific. Yeah. Wow. It happened to my mom. She got a pair of kids binoculars and some other random kid toy, which she just gave to the girls. But she's like, I didn't order it. She talked to customer service and they told her about this scam. So I was like, oh, it's maybe something like that. And my impression is it's usually items that are kind of cheap, right? Because they don't want to spend a lot of money. sending people free products. So I get online and double check and this thing is $80. Wow. And I'm like, that's really expensive. And I look in our history and it was ordered. And so I'm like, huh, maybe someone like got into our account. Maybe there's some kind of hacking. We need to change our password, et cetera. So this is a big mystery all day. Like what, where did this tile kit for $80 come from?

Laura

I have a theory, but I'm curious to hear what really happened because, yeah, I have a suspicion. Oh, I'm curious to hear what your theory is. Okay. So I don't want to like spoil it because I don't know. I'm pretty confident about this. But what I'm going to do is I'm going to go on mute so you can't hear me. I'm going to record what I think the answer is and then we'll have it recorded for posterity and we'll put it at the end of the episode as like a bonus so listeners can see if I was right. Okay. Oh, fun. Love it. Okay. So I'm going on mute.

Shanna

So we'll see. Oh, okay. Okay. So the day goes on. I'm still just wondering about this. It started to cross my mind that maybe one of the girls accidentally ordered it when they're on my phone because they're always on my phone. I'm way too liberal with like them knowing my password, they know my password, photos on the phone all the time. Maybe they navigated to Amazon and bought this thing. And I'm just like, why this though? Like it's not like it's in our order history. It's so random. So later that evening, an idea comes to me because I remember that sometimes Steve and I order products through our Echo Dot, through Alexa. We'll be going about our day. We'll be like, oh shoot, we're out of dog food. And it's like, Alexa, refill the whatever dog food. And it's easy.

Laura

Whoa, I knew this existed, but I forgot. Okay, I have no idea how to find it.

Shanna

If you want to find it, you go in and you hit activity. Okay. And you can go through and look at everything you've said to Alexa, which I'm embarrassed because of the amount of times I'm like, Turn on the light, you know, just like she's not listening to me and I'm like getting impatient. Like, oh my God, all that shit's recorded. We should add this to what I googled this week, by the way. Yeah, wait, in what regard?

Laura

What I asked, you know who this week.

Shanna

Oh. Yes, or maybe like, what offensive things I said to Alexa this week.

Laura

How have I berated her this week?

Shanna

I'm sorry everyone if this is triggering your devices right now. It's really hard to tell this story without saying the A word. I've muted my own so she'll be quiet during this story. So this history is really helpful if you're trying to solve a mystery. So when I went into my Amazon, I saw that the tile kit was ordered the previous day. So I went into my Alexa history and I looked through everything we said to her that day to see if anyone purchased this kit.

Laura

Yeah.

Shanna

Laura, I'm going to send you a voice recording from about six o'clock a.m. That was recorded from my Alexa, okay? This is part one. Oh boy, okay. Okay, I just sent over part one. Okay, let's see here. Alexa.

Laura

I hear what sounds like Elle's voice whispering.

Shanna

Alexa. Yes. OK, so something is going on on the down low. And I know that this is from the family room, Echo Dot. I can tell which Echo Dot the activity comes from. So she's in the family room. Here's part two. Where is the remote?

Laura

Where is the remote? All right. How many parts are we talking here?

Shanna

Oh, there's a few. Okay. So she's looking for the TV remote. And she's enlisted Alexa's help. Here's the other part of my story, which I'll get into a little bit later. We have started hiding the remote to the TV. when we go to bed. Because Elle gets up before everyone and binges on TV before we all get up before school. And you know, obviously we don't want this habit to continue. So she's gotten up early before we're awake. Can't find the remote. She's enlisting Alexa's help. Okay. Do you have a tile on the remote?

Laura

No, no, no. Oh, okay.

Shanna

No, she has no idea about anything like that. I think she just thinks Alexa's going to be like, hey, it's under the couch or something like that.

Laura

Well, she thinks Alexa knows everything.

Shanna

Exactly. She thinks Alexa's part of the family.

Speaker 1

Sorry, I didn't find anything named remote. If you would like help finding your remote, consider purchasing a tile tracker. If you already have a tile, enable the tile skill in the Alexa app.

Laura

Wow, she went there.

Shanna

All right. Right. Yeah. Uh, here's part three of Elle's response.

Laura

Alexa put a remote tracker in my cart. Good lord, little L. Oh my god. Too mature.

Shanna

Oh my gosh. Okay, so here is Alexa's response.

Speaker 1

It's $79.99 with delivery. By tomorrow I added it to your Amazon cart for review to purchase, say buy it now.

Laura

Oh my god. Does Elle have any idea how much $79.99 is? No, probably not.

Shanna

Well, you know, you be the judge of that. Let's hear part four of Elle's response. Okay. Buy it now. Buy it now.

Laura

This girl is desperate to find this remote. But in her mind, it probably arrives instantly so she can find the remote right away.

Shanna

Oh my God. Okay, here is Alexa's response.

Speaker 1

Your order for Tile Tracker and Item Locators was placed. It will be delivered here tomorrow. The total, including tax after $10 in discounts and credits is $77.59. If you change your mind, just ask me to cancel the order.

Laura

Well, he got $10 in discounts at least.

Shanna

Oh, thank goodness for that. Okay, so remember how you were like, she probably thought like it would be an instant thing. Okay, here's part five. Okay.

Laura

Oh, thank goodness. Oh, my gosh. Do you know what's funny? This can't happen in my house because I have a pin set for purchases. But the reason that's funny is because do you know why I have a pin set for purchases? Why? because I wanna say six years ago when we first got our Echo, your husband, our producer, Steve Yager, came over to hang out. You were there too, but Steve is the one who mentioned this. And he started making jokes about ordering shit on our Alexa, just like ordering expensive stuff. And that day, I put a pin code in, to our Alexa so that it couldn't happen. But apparently you haven't learned that lesson yet.

Shanna

No, I sure haven't. Gonna rush out and do that right now. Oh, my gosh. So crazy. The other crazy thing I was going to mention is, you know, I said she's been waking up early to secretly watch TV. And I mentioned before she's got a bit of a TV addiction we need to deal with. This was before this whole tile incident and hiding the remote and everything. I got up at regular time, like 6.30. And I, for some reason, like looked at my wise camera, which is our like cameras in the kids room, you know, to see what's going on because they've been waking up and everything. And I wanted to see if anyone had woken up early that day and stuff. And I look and I see that Elle got out of bed at 3.20 a.m. And I was like, oh, maybe she went to the bathroom or something or started crafting. Or started crafting, yes, we know about that late night hobby too.

Laura

It's out of control. Well, you did Google, why is my six-year-old so hyper? The girl has so much energy.

Shanna

She has so much energy. Let me send you the video I took of her at the end of the day, that day at like 6.30 PM.

Laura

Is she just like zonked head on the table, barely able to eat her dinner?

Shanna

Let me show you the video and you can let us know.

Laura

Okay. This still doesn't make it seem like she's that tired. In the freeze frame, she's just sitting in front of a glass of milk looking super excited with her finger in the air like she's dancing to YMCA. All right, let's see. Oh, my God. She's like dancing to like a private rave in her head.

Shanna

So full of energy. You would have never known that she got up at 3 a.m. Even when I picked her up from school, she came bopping out. She was like, hi, mom. I'm like, how was the test? She's like, great. I think I got 100%. I got the test back. She got 100%. Like, oh my god, the energy of youth. I was so jealous. I would have been a complete zombie if I had done that. Yes, absolutely.

Laura

Man, it sounds like she's ready for college, just pulling all-nighters.

Shanna

Oh my God, she is so funny. So hence the remote hiding, hence the mysterious delivery. And I kind of can't wait to the end of the episode to see what your theory was. Don't tell us yet if you were right or wrong.

Laura

OK, I won't. I won't.

Shanna

So that's my check in. I'll talk a bit about CECE in our last segment. But right now I want to hear what's going on with you guys.

Laura

OK, so no one's ordered anything off my Amazon devices on

Shanna

Unbidden I know I know you're smart and have a pin number and I don't I didn't get the dig. Okay. Okay.

Laura

I'm telling you it's just because of Steve But anyway, I just didn't want him to prank us like he announced he was gonna start pranking us and I was like no, thank you and He would to lock that shit down. Yeah smart. Yeah But, okay, so my week has been clingy. It's been a clingy week. One of those, okay. So, Sebastian is a couple weeks into being 18 months, and I had forgotten, Shanna, about the separation anxiety that happens at 18 months.

Shanna

Yeah, it's fierce.

Laura

It is fierce. It is so, so intense, and I had completely forgotten about it. This child, if I turn my back, he starts flipping his shit, like melting down. It's so, I mean, it's like to the point where it's almost funny, you know, because it's so over the top. So here's an example. If I've been out of sight, I will be out of mind for a while, right? Like he's okay. But if I show my face, it reminds him that I exist and it's a really big problem. So I try not to remind him I exist. But he was playing in the playroom with Corey, and there's a baby gate on there, so we can plop him in there if needed. And I came down the stairs, and so he saw me. And so I was about to take over, but I just needed to get some water from the fridge. And I was even going to pick him up and take him with me, right? But I needed to put my water bottle down. I needed to have two hands.

Shanna

Meanwhile, Corey sitting there like, what am I, chopped liver?

Laura

Basically, poor Corey. But we'll get to that, actually, because he had his moment later this week. But there's not too much to say about that, except for I'm just trying to write it out, because I know it's a phase. I'm trying to do the thing, like I've been reminded of all the things you're supposed to do, which is like, tell them you're leaving and that mommy always comes back and then like come back really soon so that they know, you get reinforced, right, all that. That mommy comes back. But the other thing that's happened is that he started to be able to tell me in words that he wants to nurse. We call it boo boo time. And he started saying, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Oh, cute. And he'll walk up to me and grab my finger and walk me to the couch while going, ooh, ooh, ooh. And if he's really wanting it, he goes, ooh, ooh, ooh. And he just sounds like the saddest little monkey. Oh my god.

Shanna

Wow. Because he didn't want you, he wanted to stay with Corey? Mm-hmm.

Laura

So it was a, I want daddy. And it was just like screaming. So Corey eventually just sort of extracted himself because obviously Sebastian's by himself in his crib and his room. And, you know, we're trying to explain to Augie like, your baby brother deserves daddy time too and all this stuff. And when Corey left the room, I mean, it might as well have been like a seizure the way he was reacting. There was no getting through to him. But he was like, slamming himself against the door like basically you know like in movies when they like run against doors to try to knock them down because we have those toddler handles on the door to help keep them safe at you know at night because we don't have like proper baby proofing on the stairs and stuff and you know he's three and a half it's fine but the stair you know I don't want him going down the stairs at night and stuff like that.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

And he usually doesn't care. Like he usually doesn't even try his door, but he was like slamming himself into the door, kicking it. And of course, this is activating Sebastian, who could hear everything, hear all the screaming. The crux of the problem was that he wanted to keep playing with Daddy because we've gotten into a bit of a habit where like Daddy and Augie will play until it's my turn to come in and they were playing Stormtroopers apparently and he did not want to stop. Yeah. So, I mean, it was just like at least five straight minutes of screaming, kicking, trying to injure himself. Like I was basically to the point where I had to physically restrain him because I was afraid he was going to hurt himself. And he's like thrashing against me. And so I finally just started like trying to co-regulate, taking deep breaths myself while holding him, even though he's screaming at me like

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

So this is the first time that it's been switched like that, which was interesting. I could see how it could hurt your feelings, but also I get plenty. I think maybe if it didn't happen right during Sebastian's very clingy separation anxiety phase, I might have been like, where's my baby doesn't want me anymore? I'm just like, oh, it's okay.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

But you know what I realize is like this is the second week back from our two weeks preschool break. And I think like he's still just dysregulated and like all over the place because his routine was screwed up, you know.

Shanna

That's really tricky for the little kids. I noticed that too when C.C. either misses a bunch of school for being sick or when they close down for a week for a summer break. It's tricky getting them back into it. And so, yeah, I think that might have something to do with it.

Laura

Yeah. And he's not napping again, you know, like he's napped once in the past two weeks at school. So hopefully he'll start getting back into the routine and napping more and because even though it makes him go to bed later, he is just like such a happier kid. On the Daisy map, so I'll take it. But yeah, those are my check-ins for this week. Lots of crying. So much crying.

Shanna

So much crying. Oh my goodness. Well, should we move on to our special segment? Yeah, let's.

Laura

OK, so I'm going to send you a picture of something I saw on one of my Facebook mom's groups.

Shanna

Okay, it is a pink and white baby sock held onto some kind of cord or wire with a clip.

Laura

Got it. Okay, so this is the caption that accompanies this sock hanging from a wire. This might look weird, and it is. But this has been the best teething method. It's an egg in a sock. What? I'm gonna start laughing, okay. People ask me all of the time what I've used on the kids. For my son, I was a total fan of the Camellia drops and Motrin. Okay, sounds normal so far, right? Same, I did those things, okay? With my daughter, she can't have Motrin because of her heart condition, and Tylenol only does so much. Okay, following along there too, because like, you know, we know, we're not big fans of Tylenol. Yeah? I saw TikTok about putting an egg in a sock and did a little research. Come to find out, it's an old wives tale. You use a dirty sock and just put a regular egg in it, not boiled, just straight from the fridge, and hang it in the room where they sleep. What?

Shanna

I'm smelling a little BS here.

Laura

There's a little bit more. Okay. I change it out every three months. Wait, what? I thought you were gonna say three days. What? She says it does not smell because the shell is never cracked. She had her second molars coming in and I didn't even know until they popped through. She's been sleeping through the night now as well. Don't knock it before you try it. A dirty sock and an old egg. Dirty being a key, like a key part of this apparently. Like a fresh egg that you hang in a dirty sock for three months.

Shanna

Okay.

Laura

And it absorbs the carbon dioxide from the tea thing. Um, it's something.

Shanna

It is something. I mean, can't you buy, like, odor absorbers from Home Depot that do a similar thing? Look, you could do whatever you want.

Laura

I miss the point here. Okay. Okay. Okay. So before like we get too negative about this, I just want to say that like I did some research, not necessarily about like the carbon dioxide thing and all that stuff, but like I did some research basically based on this one comment I saw on the Facebook post, which was from a woman who said, I heard about this in who do circles, but I'm pretty sure there's a step missing here, lol. That made me think like, oh, okay, is this some kind of like traditional folk remedy that's been like twisted and changed and like tried to like slap some kind of science angle on it, right? And I don't want to start like knocking anyone's like traditional beliefs. And you know, I wanted to say like for people who don't know who do is like a spiritual practice that like has roots in enslaved Africans in North America. And I actually looked up this particular thing.

Shanna

Oh, man, I don't know. You know, I think people like to convince themselves these things are real in work and want to put an explanation and a reason behind it. And who knows who came up with the carbon dioxide? I think maybe eggs do absorb carbon dioxide, but does that have to do with pain? I mean, I don't know. I have a lot of plants around my house and I don't have any fewer headaches than I did before. Yeah.

Laura

I don't know, Laura. Yeah, you know, there was one comment that I really liked, which was, whoever convinced this woman to put a teething child in a room with a dirty sock and a rotten egg is living some top tier trickster god vibes. And I respect that.

Shanna

There's respect to be had.

Laura

There is. Yeah. It's one thing to hang like a, what, tobacco sack over your door out of your toddler's reach. But like this picture, it looks like she has it on like a clothesline that's, you know, easily accessible to the kid. She has an older kid. It just seems like a recipe for getting rotten egg all over your house.

Shanna

It seems a little bit dangerous and definitely a little bit smelly. It could be potentially smelly.

Laura

And then the one other comment I wanted to highlight was this woman who said, okay, most of the way through this, I was imagining handing this to the child to chew on.

Shanna

I totally thought that when you said it was a teething thing, I was like, they're going to chomp on a raw egg because it's cold. But why are we putting a dirty sock in their mouth? It was a wild ride in my brain. I'm not going to lie.

Laura

Yeah, it's just so interesting to how, like, you know, these traditional or, like, old wives' tales get passed down. Like, it starts with a tobacco muslin cloth with an egg with your child's name written on it, and now it's dirty sock hanging from a clothesline.

Shanna

Yes. It's like a traditional game of telephone, like how the traditions get passed down. Yes. Look, no shame to this lady. If this works for her and if anyone else wants to try it, I imagine people chimed in and were like, I want to try it, right?

Laura

A lot of people. Yeah. A lot of reposts. Yeah.

Shanna

So if you're at your wit's end and you want to try it, go for it. I have been at my wit's end as a parent. And like, I get it. But just know it could be like a stinky pinata ready for your child to whack with some random stick they're carrying through the house. So just beware.

Laura

Yeah, you got to be careful. I mean, Sebastian walks around with like a full-sized broom half the time because he loves that thing. So it would be gooey rotten egg instantly in our house.

Shanna

Oh God.

Laura

All right. So that is my first internet insanity. Shanna, I want to hear what you found on the old internet.

Shanna

All right, Laura, I've got one for you. And I'm going to start this one out, too, by sending you an image. OK, I love a visual aid. Let's see. Here it comes.

Laura

OK, what this looks like is a terrifying ghostly image of some kind of demon with big round eyes, like a skeleton demon coming at you with mouth open ready to chomp down on you. That's what it looks like. I actually know what this is. And I can't wait to talk about it.

Shanna

Oh, this is an MRI of a fetus.

Laura

Okay. I haven't seen any more than the ones that went viral. Let's see. Okay. So this is from a Harvard website that's titled Atlas of the Fetal MRI. And you sent me the face page.

Shanna

I think that the face images might be more interesting than like the knees. I don't know.

Laura

It's okay. So the way MRIs work is they are like slices, right? Like they're just one plane at any given time.

Shanna

For some reason, describing a baby's face is a slice of their face while looking at these images doesn't help, Laura. It doesn't help. It's just a slice of face that looks like a demon with big round white eyes.

Laura

Yeah. I mean, yes. But you know, so that's why they look flat, I should say. But you're getting like the, you know, that plane of their bodies. Yes. These are nightmare inducing.

Shanna

Yeah. And this site goes down like it starts with the 19 weeks. fetus picture 22 all the way down to 36. So I was like, why do fetuses get MRIs? Is it because like the mom is going in for one and like accidentally like takes a snapshot of the belly or what is it? And apparently it is something that doctors will do. It's a type of scan they will do on fetuses if they need to get a better look at the brain.

Laura

I imagine they don't want to do them regularly.

Shanna

Yeah, they're more costly and you don't really need that level of detail. But I did find this little explanation of why they look particularly creepy. Okay. So from Snopes, it says that MRI employs magnetic fields and radio waves to image parts of the body, particularly organs with high concentrations of water like the brain. The brains and eyes of these particular images appear so bright because MRI has exquisite soft tissue contract. So I guess like the way the amount of like liquid in the brain and the eyes really makes them very vivid. And that's kind of what makes these pictures look so, I don't know, unearthly and kind of creepy.

Laura

I'm clicking through the other ones and they're actually less creepy. If you click on the extremities one and go to arms, there's actually a bunch of really adorable pictures. If you need a palette cleanser, is all I'm saying.

Shanna

Oh, good. Yeah, I imagine the MRI images are better if like the fetus is captured from the side or not just like a straight on. Oh yeah, that's sweet. That's kind of like a side view of the baby. Oh, random demon. Okay. I'll just do a cute side view.

Laura

This reminds me of the terrible sonograms I got during Augie's pregnancy.

Shanna

Yeah, how you poor thing they were a little creepy.

Laura

Do you remember how I talked about a couple months ago and the like why is my kid crying? Segment how he wanted to see a picture of himself in my belly and I showed him the straight-on view and then he had nightmares. Oh No

Shanna

Poor thing. Well, don't let them ever see these pictures. Never, never. Never. And listeners, if you ever need to get an MRI of your fetus, just be forewarned that they might look a little bit creepy. But your baby will come out looking beautiful.

Laura

Yes, even though I had a scary skeleton sonogram of Augie, he came out very cute. This is true. Can confirm.

Shanna

All right. I want to know what your next Internet insanity is.

Laura

Okay. So my next Internet insanity, I'm actually just going to send you the video. Okay. Ooh, okay. Okay. I'm sending you the video that I found on Facebook. Try not to read the caption if you can to be surprised.

Shanna

Oh, okay. Opening it up, not reading caption. If you can, that's kind of hard. Okay. Do you mean not read? I'm squinting at it. Okay. Do you mean not read the red, big, huge, gigantic letters? Yes, don't read those. Okay. Good thing I'm squinting. Oh, the red letters at the top are fine.

Laura

The green letters at the bottom are the problem. Okay. What?

Shanna

I got to watch this again. Hold on. It's a real, so it just keeps going. What the hell? Oh my God, my husband falls through our ceiling? Well, the mom is nursing her daughter.

Laura

What the actual F is going on there? All right. So this got served to me. Usually I get served like really horrifying stuff on Facebook that's like, all the terrible ways your kids could die. Like every news story about anything bad that happens at a daycare. Like Facebook just basically wants me to have anxiety. And this one I guess could give me anxiety but it's not something I'm worried about in my day to day life. It is a video from someone's ring cam and it's a woman just sitting on her like recliner nursing her baby and then all of a sudden her husband's legs. Break through the ceiling and he's dangling the man falls through the roof dramatically And my favorite thing and she just sits there and she turns around she goes. Oh my god. Are you okay? What do you want me to do?

Shanna

Oh, that's amazing.

Laura

Danielle said one time I was just hanging out in my room and a man started falling through my ceiling. It was someone my dad had hired to fix something in our attic. Scared me to death. It's like, so many people. How do stories about this? People need to stop walking on their ceilings. Apparently, apparently, but so funny. And I just, I couldn't find any answers like what happened next. Like where did she put the baby? Yeah, like the important questions, what happened to the baby? But I do like, there's also people who are defending her because I guess people were like, she didn't even like run to his aid. And it's like, one person pointed out, everyone wondering why she didn't startle or jump up has never done either of those things while nourishing a baby and quotes.

Shanna

Yes, truth, 100% truth. And look, who knows, maybe that woman recently had a C-section or had an infected incision from her C-section three months ago, like me, and it's not so easy to jump up when your husband's falling through the ceiling. Nope, certainly not.

Laura

I really wish I knew how she caught him out, though. I guess you'd have to put like a ladder under there. Yeah, I guess. So funny.

Shanna

Just dropped to the ground, I mean.

Laura

Yeah, so this is from someone named Heather Nicole, and it looks like she has a TikTok called organized underscore mom life. So go check it out. Give her some props for handling that situation like a pro. Yes. All right. So, Shanna, I hear you have one more internet insanity for us, but I was thinking maybe we should take a break and come back with it. What do you think? I think we should.

Shanna

So this internet insanity is for people who maybe are between babies or done having babies and have baby fever but don't want to have another baby and maybe are getting puppy fever.

Laura

Did they ask you how long you breastfed for and whether you show your dogs screen time?

Shanna

Oh, I love that throwback to that preschool that I toured with CeCe. That's amazing. No, but it was close. They asked who would take the dog if I died, what brand of dog food I would feed it. I thought I had great answers for all of those things, but you know. I'm sure you did. And zero screen time. Zero screen time. And I will breastfeed that dog as long as I need to.

Laura

And you just play podcasts for the dogs all day. Your own podcast. Did you put that in the...

Shanna

The dog will be well educated in pregnancy and parenting. Anyway, so this internet insanity serves as a warning to people with puppy fever like myself. I came across this article on Buzzfeed, Buzzfeed News, and a man paid $150 for two toy poodles. And toy poodles are adorable, right here. Let me send you a picture of a toy poodle.

Laura

In my head, all I see are like, you know, the stereotypical poodles with puff feet and tails and all that.

Shanna

Okay, I sent you the picture. Yeah, so a fluffy little thing and a toy poodle, right? So a little one.

Laura

Yeah. Oh, but this one has fur all over, not just in those like manicured, what would you call it, like hedges of topiaries.

Shanna

Yeah, where it's like a naked tail and then a big puff at the end of it.

Laura

Yeah, yeah.

Shanna

No, very, very, very fluffy, white fur, very adorable. So this man in Argentina pays $150 for two of these toy poodles.

Laura

Oh, I mean, first of all, it's poor ferret. No, I know. So much hair. Oh, here's the thing. It does not. It doesn't look like a dog. You know, it's like if you know anything about dogs, it's got this like snotty nose. I mean, OK, did you know that like one of the hardest things apparently for like AI to do is to like distinguish between cats and dogs?

Shanna

Really?

Laura

Apparently, like it's it's one of the things that's like a challenge. I mean, maybe they've figured it out now because like AI can do everything. But it was like one of the initial challenges because actually cats and dogs, if you try to describe them are very similar for legs, fur, nose, ears, you know, like it's very hard to distinguish. So like when I'm describing this, it's going to sound like I'm describing a dog. Like it's got the snouty nose. It has lots of whiskers. It's The eyes, it just does not have a dog face. I'm a human who can identify between dogs and cats and ferrets. And yeah, that's that ain't no poodle.

Shanna

No, it is a very rodent like snout with pink nose and tiny, tiny, tiny little eyes that are embedded in this massive mound of white fur. There's no ears to be seen. Mm-hmm.

Laura

Good point. Good point. They're probably hidden behind this like massive, I mean, it looks like a pom-pom with little beady eyes that you glued on basically. Yeah. It's just straight white hair. Just puffed out. In a full circle. Yeah. Oh my gosh.

Shanna

And I feel so bad for the ferret too because it's been given steroids. since birth to try to trick people into thinking it's a dog, a puppy. I'm sure someone thought they were buying a puppy, right? And so it's like, oh, this like little white fluff thing. I guess that could be a poodle puppy or whatever. So it's like, it's just a crazy, just awful scam all around. And I'm just here to say, if you are looking for a puppy to fill the void of baby fever in your life, just make sure it's not a ferret, okay?

Laura

Yeah. And you know, a good way to do that is to like go with a reputable adoption, you know, rescue agency. They're not taking in ferrets and their dogs. Yeah.

Shanna

Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.

Laura

The only mix up they might have is whether your cat is a female or male.

Shanna

No, Amy.

Laura

A boy. And I was like, what? So it turns out he had something called crypt orchidism, which is like when the testes don't descend. And so no one knew that he was a boy and he was very fluffy. So no one really saw his little tiny kitten penis in there. Oh my gosh. So he got neutered instead of spayed and we had to change his name and not because I don't know, it just seemed like aggressively progressive to like have a male cat named Lady Bird. So we chose the name Cal, which is the protagonist of Jeffrey Eugenity's book, Middlesex. Okay. So I thought that was like an appropriate, appropriate name. You know, it's about a person who was assigned female at birth, but then later identifies as male. And I was like, great, plus it's a great book. Want to Pulitzer? Wonderful book. Anyway, that's perfect. Yeah, there we go. So that's how we got Cal. But he was indeed feline.

Shanna

Good. Good.

Laura

Good.

Shanna

No, I don't think you were looking for a ferret. So you're all set with your cat.

Laura

Yes. Okay. So anyway, do I hope that you get a puppy? Like, how do you feel about the fact that you haven't heard back about that puppy?

Shanna

Oh, I feel super bummed. The puppy was really cute. The reason I really was into it is because it looked like chili. You know, when I really missed my chili butt and it looked like it would be a puppy that would be similar to him. And I was like, oh my God. Yes, yes, yes. And you know, it's probably better that I don't have a puppy right now. You know, that's a lot of work.

Laura

It is.

Shanna

I don't think, Laura, I act on impulse. It was all heart emotion as I typed that out of 100%. And 10 pages of that application. Yes, exactly.

Laura

So that was a fun segment, but I do think we need to move on to our BFPs and BFNs. What do you say? Oh, indeed.

Shanna

Why is everything in your life trying to upstage me right now? Sorry, Shanna. That's OK. That's OK. I will persevere.

Laura

I'll just mute myself while you tell us what you have. But I want to know, is it a BFP or a BFN?

Shanna

It's a BFP. Oh, good. Yes. So, you know, CECE sleeping has been on and off. Sometimes we have success, and sometimes she just wakes up super early or multiple times at night or goes to bed late. And I'm just like, you know, these damn preschool naps. Like I just, that's a two hour nap period from one to three. And like what kid is going to go to bed at a regular time and sleep a good amount of time when they've napped two hours and wake up at three? What three and a half year old, I should say. because I think littler kids do need that rest. Cece doesn't. She didn't nap before she went to preschool, right? And my BFP is that I approached her teacher with this concern and the teacher was super nice and like, oh yeah, you know, that's not a problem. Why don't we try capping her nap to an hour? I'm like, okay, great, let's try that. So she tried that for a little while and that was better.

Laura

Oh, that's good. I didn't know there would be an awake room. But she's in an older classroom now, right? So that makes sense.

Shanna

Yeah. And then, you know, her preschool goes up to like age five. So I think she'll hang out with some of the older kids in the other classroom when they don't nap.

Laura

Yeah, that sounds good. Augie's very hit and miss with it. But I think they're like mandated to do some rest time, which honestly, he needs rest, like he needs to sit quietly. And the only way he's going to do that is if someone forces him to do it.

Shanna

So yeah.

Laura

But that's great. I'm so glad. I think it's so funny that the teacher was like, oh, thank God.

Shanna

Oh, I don't blame her. I love my CECE so much, but I know how she is when she wakes up from naps, especially. She's not happy. She just wants to stay asleep. So it's hard. But yeah, I think this is going to be good change for us. And I'm really happy about it. That's good to hear. I'm happy for you. Thank you. All right, your turn. What do you got for us this week? BFP or BFN? I have a BFP. I'm right. And that is that Uncle Dan came to visit and we went to the beach.

Laura

How fun. Uncle Dan is Corey's brother. That's right. Uncle Dan is Corey's brother. He lives in central California. So it's just a couple hours away, but like it's like three and a half hours away. And, you know, he comes down as much as possible, but it had been a little while and schedules hadn't lined up. So he finally got to come down. Corey and his mom and Dan went to a concert on Friday night. And then on Saturday, we all went to the beach. And here, I'm going to just send you some photos and videos from our Beach day.

Shanna

Oh, fun. Okay, let me take a look. All right. Oh, beach day. Sebastian in his long sleeve. Swim top with his trucks in the sand. Oh, yeah. Augie sitting and eating snacks, maybe, between swims.

Laura

Yeah, he did not want to get out of the water. And even though it's August, the Pacific Ocean is cold. So cold. The big part of the BFP is that Uncle Dan was game to like get in the water with Augie and Sebastian. And Corey and I are not huge fans. Actually, like Corey really does not like cold water. I usually the one who has to get in and like shiver. with Auggie. But Uncle Dan was like, no, I'm here for bonding. Let's do it. And he spent so much time in the water with them. It was awesome. But yeah, this is this picture of Auggie. We like dragged him out of the water shivering like lips purple because we're like, you have to go warm up. So we have like him wrapped up in like towels and he's, um, he said, I'm not hungry. I'm not hungry. And then he proceeded to like finish half of a bag of pretzel sticks, like an adult bag of pretzel sticks.

Shanna

Yeah. Oh, I love the picture with Uncle Dan in the water. What a great uncle. I love it.

Laura

There's actually a slo-mo video that I sent you that you should check out of Uncle Dan and Augie. Okay, let's see.

Shanna

How fun Uncle Dan is holding his hands and helping him kind of jump over a wave and the ginormous grin does not leave Augie's face the entire time he is loving it loved it like that's him living his best life and Sebastian to one thing I will say is Sebastian is way too bold around the water like.

Laura

Augie, it was never an issue. He always let us hold his hand and made sure like we had an arm around him anywhere near the water. Sebastian is like, no, like he like pulls his arm away and like wants to run off by himself and is fucking scary.

Shanna

That's really scary. Don't you have a life preserver vest you put on him at the beach? Is it you that did that?

Laura

Yeah, that was me. That was me first time mom super paranoid with Augie. But then because Augie never really needed it because he would never like be anywhere away from us. I stopped using it. But of course, now we might have to bring it back out for Sebastian because he's a little stinker.

Shanna

Yeah. Well, it sounds like you guys had an amazing day and I'm so glad you got to spend time with Uncle Dan. Very fun. Yeah.

Laura

So it was awesome. And hopefully Uncle Dan and Auntie Angela will be able to come next time. Yeah. We love having them here. It was so fun. But that's it for me this week, and I think that might be it for our show.

Shanna

I think so, but I have a five-star review to read, and at the very end of the credits, we are gonna listen to your prediction of why I received that tile package from Amazon. Alright, this one comes from Australia from user bebexy21. The title is keeping it real five stars. Have been following you ladies from the beginning. Enjoy listening to your advice when navigating parenting. Thank you for sharing your life with us all. You are so welcome and thank you for listening. Yes, thank you for listening. All right, listeners, if you want to hear your five-star review read on the show, head on over to Apple Podcasts wherever you listen. Leave us a five-star review and say what you like about the show. And we might read it on an upcoming episode. And if you have any internet insanities you want to share with us, drop us a message. Laura, where can they reach us?

Laura

We are on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok at BFP Podcast. We have a website, BigBatPositivePodcast.com. If you want to send us an email, you can always throw a voice memo in there. Just send it to contact at bigbatpositivepodcast.com. And if you want to join the coolest group of people on the internet, just search Facebook for Big Fat Positive Community request to join. It's really important that you answer those two membership questions because it's a private group and we just need to make sure you're not going to like spam us or you know, you're actually a robot. Once you answer those questions, we'll send you straight through to the amazing conversations we're having in there.

Shanna

Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Laura, I want to know what was your prediction. All right, here's what it was.

Laura

Shanna, can you hear me? Can you hear me? Okay. She can't hear me guys. All right. So my theory is that it was in her shopping cart and her Amazon Echo device, whose name we shall not mention, prompted at some point, you still have this in your cart. The prices change. Would you like to order it? And L or CECE said yes and bought it. And that's how it ended up at their front door.

Shanna

Ooh, girl, that's really close. You were on the right track with it being my kid and Alexa, so good job. Kudos to you. All right, we'll see y'all next week.

Laura

Maybe I'll make some more good predictions next week.

Shanna

Thanks for listening, everyone. Bye. Bye.