Mom Hacks for Breastfeeding and Toddler Cooperation – Ep. 163

Shanna

Hi, welcome to Big Fat Positive with Shanna and Laura. On this week's episode, we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, What the Hack, where we give some parenting tips on things like baby powder, blankets, and breastfeeding. We wrap it up with our weekly BFPs and BFNs. Let's get started. Hey, everyone. Welcome to episode 163. Hi, Laura. Hi, Shanna. How are you guys doing? Why don't you kick us off with your check-in? How old are your kiddos?

Laura

Hi, yeah. So, Augie is two and a half and Sebastian is five months old. And yeah, let's see. This week, let's start with Augie, the two and a half year old. I feel like two and a half is kind of a hard time. I don't know. Are you feeling the same way? Yeah. Yep. It's getting more challenging. I just feel like there's a lot of big feelings. There's a lot of like separation anxiety issues popping up. I guess let me just get into my check-in because maybe it's just me. Maybe it's all the changes that have been happening recently or maybe it's just being two and a half. I don't know. But Augie lately, he's been really like clingy with me. He's doing this thing now where he like explicitly says, I want mommy time. Basically, every time our new nanny shows up, Ariel, the first thing he says is, I want mommy time. And I try to give it to him.

Shanna

Oh my God. What?

Laura

Yeah. And so I was like, this was on Friday. So I was like, he didn't go psycho. He's two and a half. And so like I went over to him and tried to see what was going on. And that really threw me for a loop. I was just like, what the heck? She just told me that my son went psycho on her and she didn't know what to do about it. That didn't give me a lot of confidence in her. But after I calmed down a little bit and talked to him, we took him upstairs and got him down for his nap in air quotes. He was just playing in his crib. I actually sat her down to talk to her about it, and I was like, so I need to talk to you about the fact that you said he went psycho. He's two and a half. He didn't go psycho. He's having a tantrum. He's having big feelings. Your job is to keep him safe and manage it, but I didn't like hearing you say that. And she apologized.

Shanna

But where are you going to hide? What are you going to do?

Laura

Well, at least we have a big house. I don't know, like hide in our bedroom, I guess with the baby. It kind of sucks. But I mean, I see her point to an extent that, you know, he's very mommy clean. He doesn't want to be with her. So anytime he sees me, it snaps him out of like playing or whatever. But Oh, yeah. It does pose a problem since I'm, you know, at home with the baby and I'm here, you know? So, yeah. That's TBD. We'll see.

Shanna

We'll see how that goes next week. Yeah, that's tricky. I can only imagine how CECE would be if I brought someone in and was like, okay, you're going to hang out exclusively with this individual today while I'm like busying around the house. Oh, no. She would not be able to handle it on my leg the whole time. So I really feel for you.

Laura

Yeah. I mean, it's a weird concept for them, right? But the thing is, he would do it with Amber, right? It was a smaller house and he was fine with it. So I don't know. We'll see. Right. But anyway, that's what's going on with him. That's a little bit. I don't know, it's just tricky. So we're just kind of taking a wait and see and be flexible approach with it. But I just, it sucks to me that he's had so many transitions lately and they haven't been smooth, you know what I mean?

Shanna

But yeah, that's true. He had a new baby brother moved to a new house. His nanny quit. Yeah. So that's a lot for a little two and a half year old.

Laura

Yeah.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

So I'm trying to give him some grace. But speaking of the baby, baby brother, we had a big week because he got his helmet. Wow. How does he like it? I want to know everything. He got his plagiosephaly helmet. So for people who maybe don't remember, he has been fitted for a helmet because he had a asymmetrical head with a flat spot on the back right side. And we went to a place that made something called a star band. They all call them bands. I don't know why they're helmets, but they don't want to call them helmets because, like, the top is open. So they're a band, not a helmet, but it's a helmet.

Shanna

Oh, the top is open. Yeah.

Laura

I think to vent, like, heat. Cause that is one thing about the helmet that I didn't realize is that it makes them super hot all the time. That makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. So that's been an adjustment. It's interesting. There's actually a whole like a climatization process to the helmet. I didn't realize was going to happen. You actually spend five days working up to full time wear. So on day one, you wear it like one hour on, one hour off, alternating, and you don't wear it for naps or sleep, nighttime sleep. Second day, you wear it for four hours on, one hour off, and no naps or nighttime. Day three, it's eight hours on, one hour off, and you do wear it for sleep. There might have been another day in there. I'm trying to remember. But anyway, you slowly increase it until you get eight hours on one hour off. And then the next day, which was actually today, you do 23 hours on one hour off.

Shanna

Wow. Okay. So he really has to wear that all the time. And how long will this last for?

Laura

Yeah, it's a lot of time in the helmet. I mean, it's full time. You take it off to like take a bath and clean it basically. You have to wipe it down with alcohol every day. And yeah, the thing is no one really knows how long he's going to need the helmet because it kind of depends on how fast his head conforms to it. But it could be three months. It could be up to six months. It depends on sort of like if we catch a growth spurt at the right time or If, you know, he is head grows faster, you know, because you're basically what you're trying to do is catch growth spurts, right? And get the head to like grow into the shape of the helmet. You're not like the helmet isn't pushing on the head to like reshape it. It's waiting for the head to grow into it, if that makes sense. So you have to get those growth spurts.

Shanna

Yeah, there was a lot going on. Right. Right.

Laura

I will say that with hindsight 2020, I wish we had just like gone and gotten this second opinion faster. So we could have gotten it on him faster. So if you're out there and you're listening and you think you're going to need a helmet and you're kind of waffling, just like just do it sooner because that means less time in the helmet altogether. So, learn from me. So what does he think of it? So he's fine with it. Really? Yeah, he's totally, completely fine with it. Like all my worries about it work unfounded. Like he proves to be a chill baby once again, like doesn't mind it at all. The first couple of days he sweat like, I mean, like pigs don't sweat. I don't know what to sweat.

Shanna

Wait, do pigs sweat?

Laura

I don't I don't think so is not why they wallow in mud exactly exactly He was just dripping sweat and it was kind of gross and like the helmet does start to get stinky You have to be like really careful about like wash, you know like wiping it out with alcohol and sometimes sticking to the sun to disinfect and stuff Oh my god.

Shanna

Well in summer too. What a great time. I know started on this. I know right it definitely has like a

Laura

old shoes but yeah he doesn't mind it for me it's a little dangerous because he's like you know they throw their heads around already these little babies like five-month-old babies are just learning how to sort of have trunk control and stuff and sometimes they lose it and they slam into your own face and then add a helmet into that

Shanna

So you're worried for your own safety.

Laura

Yes I am. You are so gonna get face bruises. Oh my god I'm gonna like lose a tooth or something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, he's doing just fine with the helmet and he slept fine with it. I mean, fine, relatively. He slept the same with it. He's been sleeping not great, but he doesn't seem to mind. So I'm happy with that. And I'm here to tell anyone who's like worried about getting the helmet, like lots of babies, I think, just don't care at all. So including mine. Good. Yeah, but anyway, that's what we've been doing this week. But I want to hear about your week, Shanna. How old are your girls? And what's new with you guys?

Shanna

Well, we are good over here. Cece is two years, seven months. Elle is almost five and a half, and she's getting ready for kindergarten. And big news here. I have officially become a PTA mom. I signed up for her PTA for kindergarten. And I don't know how I feel about that.

Laura

Okay. I mean, well, what does it entail? Like, I remember what PTA moms did when I was in elementary school, but I imagine it's a little different nowadays.

Shanna

I don't know exactly what it's going to entail, but signing up was like going to a website and paying $8 and like putting my name in the list. So that was easy enough.

Laura

Wait, you have to pay to be a PTA mom and volunteer your time?

Shanna

Yeah. Yeah. A whole buck of Rooney's. And I signed Steve up. He's a PTA dad, and that was also $8. So our family's working out the big bucks. Yes. It goes to a good cause. It goes to a good cause. I don't know what the $8 is for. There's details on this website. I don't have time for details. I'm just like, $8, sure, whatever. And I really want to be involved in her schooling and everything but there's part of me that like I really hovered over the submit button for a while because like thinking about like fundraising events. I don't know organizing bake sales.

Laura

Oh no.

Shanna

Time for this and then feeling guilty. So I'm a little bit worried about that. I'm going to have to find a way to make sure I set my boundaries and everything and not take on more than I can chew. But I do want to be involved and I do want to meet the other parents and everything. So I did sign up. Look at you, PTA Shanna. Yeah, PTA Shanna. So that's that. Another thing going on this week is I came up with a new trick for waking CeCe up from her nap happy. Okay. So you're probably like, wake up your kid from their nap, I know. But I think I've talked about before, like I just freak out if she sleeps like too long because I'm like that messes up the night time sleeping. That's my alone time. So I try to wake her up at three o'clock. And what time does she go down? Oh, like 1230 to one maybe. Okay. So that's still a good long nap. It's really long. Yeah.

Laura

So you just wake her up with something she likes. Yeah, not my face.

Shanna

Yeah, exactly. So we'll see if that plan continues to work well for me.

Laura

I love it. I mean, I have had to wake Augie up from his naps. I mean naps. Naps. We know how naps have been going here, but there are times where he does pass out hard. And yeah, it's hard to know how to wake him up. I love the idea of like a Wi-Fi enabled speaker, like Alexa or whatever playing on music.

Shanna

Yeah. So give it a try. Pump truck tunes, increasingly loud volume.

Laura

Bucket wheel excavator.

Shanna

If you start low, it eases into their consciousness, so by the time it's blaring, it's not like scaring the shit out of them. Like boiling a frog. Yeah, there you go.

Laura

Boiling a frog and being awake.

Shanna

All right. Last little bit of check in. Cece lately has just not been eating very much. She doesn't have much of an appetite. She often will eat like two bites of lunch, two bites of dinner, just a couple of snacks. And it's one of those things that's like, oh my God, I could very easily freak out about this and worry that she's not getting enough nutrition. but I do know from like parenting L that I've learned like that calories kind of like even out you know over a week it's more about kind of the nutrition they take in over a week or whatever but still I did Google it because I wanted to find out like you know what's going on and so it's totally common

Laura

Oh, that's good because I need some tips too. I feel like Augie's very inconsistent. Like some days he's just ravenous and he eats everything in sight and then other days he's just like one bite of dinner or no bites of dinner and he's just like I'm all done and yeah it's just like uh are you are you gonna be okay are you gonna wake up hungry what's going on oh you know yeah are you gonna wake up hungry is it gonna affect your sleep like and then is that gonna bother me and I just get all wound up it all comes back to whether my alone adult time is gonna get messed up

Shanna

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So first of all, just avoid conversation about eating. Don't talk about it in front of your kid. Don't harp on the fact that they're not eating. Don't extend mealtime. If everyone else is done, don't make the toddler stay and finish their food. This is all from a site called Legacy Pediatrics by the way. One thing they suggested was serving small portions of food like less than what you think your child will actually eat because that might encourage them to eat more if they're hungry because then there will be like a sense of accomplishment. A big meal might be intimidating to them and they might just not eat as much. And so I'm starting to try that with her. You know, we'll serve her the same amount that Elle gets, right? And she's five and a half, but we'll serve equal plates.

Laura

That makes sense. I've heard that before, but I've never really figured out why. I've heard give them small portions, but I never looked into why. So the fact that it can be intimidating, that makes sense to me. I get so annoying because then he'll eat it and be like, I want more. And I'm like, I just sat down.

Shanna

All right. Oh, that whole conundrum. That's something you are not going to avoid for the next several years. The constant requests for things from the kitchen. The second I sit down, mama, I don't have a straw. I need milk. I need water. I need a spoon. I gave you a spoon, but there's mac and cheese already on it. I need a clean spoon. Get your own spoon.

Laura

Yeah, we have a lot of like, I need a fork. Like you have a fork. I need a big fork. I need a mommy fork. Okay, here, just take my fork and then I have to go get myself a fork.

Shanna

Oh, the things we do for these kids. Oh, yeah.

Laura

So does she eat her green beans because I will put like two green beans on Augie's plate and it doesn't matter. Like he doesn't even touch them.

Shanna

Oh, it depends. It depends on the day. It really depends on her appetite. If she has a big appetite, she will eat vegetables for sure.

Laura

Ooh, I should show him that because I'll take that at this point. I'll take him touching it to his tongue at this point. Oh, he just hates veggies, huh? It's like a mental thing. It's not like he actually hates them. It's like he thinks he's supposed to hate them, I think. He just goes, that's yucky. I'm like, you don't even know what you're talking. Where did he get that idea? Where did kids come up with this? I don't know. And now he doesn't want crusts on his sandwiches. I'm like, how? You don't go to school yet. You don't see other kids eating sandwiches, and somehow you just know that you're not supposed to have the crust on the sandwiches.

Shanna

Same with my kids. I have no idea how CeCe knows to hate crust, but she will not touch it and demands that I take crust off of every piece of toast, every sandwich.

Laura

Where did that come from? I don't know, but like half my diet these days are like the crusts of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Shanna

Well, that's good. It doesn't go to waste. And ours goes straight in the trash because mama doesn't like crust either. So, you know, maybe they inherited it from me. Oh my gosh, funny kids. Anyway, that's all going on with us this week. Should we take a break and come back with our special segment? I think we should.

Laura

Okay, we are back in our special segment this week is what the hack where Shanna and I share some parenting tips and tricks that we have figured out along our journeys through pregnancy and parenthood. Shanna, I'm dying to hear your hacks. How can you help our listeners and honestly me with some parenting stuff? All right. Here we go.

Shanna

My first hack is for the beach. Okay. Appropriate for summer? Yes. So you know how when you go to the beach and your kid gets wet or even when you get wet and then you get the sand on you and like sand is kind of stuck all over your body and maybe there's not a beach shower nearby to rinse stuff off? Well, the thing to do is have a bottle of baby powder on hand. You just shake it out onto your kid's skin or your feet, legs, whatever, and then brush the skin, and all of that sand just falls right off. It's amazing. Yeah, it's a great, like before you get in the car, just have your kids stand there on the sidewalk and like, and then brush them off. And it just dries the skin really quick so that all that little sand can just fall off pretty easily.

Laura

Oh, that makes sense because it's the moisture that's keeping it on the skin, right? Mm-hmm. Oh, that's smart. That's smart. Gotta put some baby powder in the beach bag, I guess.

Shanna

Yeah, just don't do what I did. I was like, oh, I need some baby powder before we go to the beach. And I just ordered it online at Target and went to get it. And it was like the 64-ounce giant. Like, two-liter-sized thing of baby powder. I already, like, lugging enough shit to the beach right now, this giant-ass thing of baby powder. So get a small travel size if you can.

Laura

That's funny. Oh, my gosh. Yes, don't be like Shanna listeners. Don't be like Shanna.

Shanna

Yeah. That's a good tip. Thanks. What's your first hack for us?

Laura

Okay. So all of mine are going to be like breastfeeding or feeding related since that's like the world I'm in right now. And this first one, I actually posted a video about it to our TikTok. If you want to follow us on TikTok, we're at BFP podcast. We're starting to like. Try to post more TikToks as everyone knows. I love my TikTok. But it's something that can help you nurse discreetly if you want to without having to buy like special nursing outfits. And it's something that people call either the two shirt method or the one up one down method. Did you ever do this when you were nursing? No. Okay, so instead of having to have like a special nursing top, all you have to do is wear a tank top with either like a stretchy neckline or it can be like a nursing tank top. It's up to you under a normal shirt. And the idea is that one shirt goes down while the other one goes up.

Shanna

Totally. You know what else I like is that it covers the stomach area because pulling up a shirt over your boob and you got your baby there, then like your stomach is exposed. And I don't know. That's kind of odd too.

Laura

Yeah. And we had winter babies, right? Winter newborns. So it really helps to have like the tummy not exposed to the frigid air. So yeah. Yes. The frigid Los Angeles air. I know it was like 58 degrees once.

Laura

Yeah. But anyway, yeah, the one up one down or the two shirt method. That's so great. And if you want to see a video, go to our TikTok.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

Yeah. Okay. So that's my first one.

Shanna

You have another one? I do. Okay. Here's my next hack. Okay. I often struggle to get my kids to wash their hands. Like I can get them to the sink sometimes. They're standing on their stool and they're just like, no, I don't want to wash my hands. And it's like a little struggle. And so my hack to turn it into a little game is I'm like, do you want to catch the soap? And they're like, huh? And I take the soap pump and I bring it up, up, up high in the sky. I say, put out your hands, see if you can catch a drop. And then I pump it. and they have to try to catch it with their hand, you know? And so it's like that gets them interested in it and then they've got soap on their hand and then they're just into it and then they know what to do next and they just scrub and wash and it just makes that step easier because sometimes it's like getting the soap on their hands that's so hard.

Laura

We have struggles too, although Augie just likes, he's like, I want to do it. I want to do the soap, but it's hard for a kid to like do, The soap thing and we don't have like a good step stool set up yet. So we like I'm holding him anyway. I'm gonna try catch the soap. That sounds awesome.

Shanna

Yeah, do it. Okay. All right. What's your next hack?

Laura

Okay. My next one was actually sent in by a listener named Courtney on our Facebook group. So she wrote in first all to tell me that her son is also obsessed with truck tunes But also she had a tip which I haven't had a chance to try but I am totally going to try it ASAP Which is if your baby is on like a pacifier or bottle strike to put like the pacifier or bottle nipple in your bra for a couple hours Before you give them the bottle to try to get them to like take it

Shanna

So to warm it up and get your scent on there.

Laura

Yes, to get those mommy pheromones all over it.

Shanna

So definitely gonna try that. You gotta try that.

Laura

Yeah, I gotta try that. I did that with like a lovey for Augie back when he was little, like he had these little muslin cloth loveys. I would like put them in my bra for a couple hours so that it would smell like me to try to help with separation anxiety.

Shanna

That's cute.

Laura

Yeah. So yeah, I'm going to try that for sure.

Shanna

That's awesome.

Laura

What's your next hack?

Shanna

My next hack is for the problem when you go out of town and you want your kid to sleep or nap in a room that doesn't have blackout curtains. That's like a moment of panic as a parent, right? I've done this many times. The first time I encountered it, we went up to our cabin in Northern California and tried to get Elle to nap in this bedroom and I was like, holy shit, there's like no curtains here. What do I do? The solution I've discovered is to take black garbage bags and tape them to the window and voila, you have a dark room. And the added bonus to that is that if you buy the heavy duty contractor trash bags, Those are the ones to get because they are so thick. I brought them with us to Redondo Beach. And one bag just completely covered and blacked out the room. I didn't need to put a couple on there. There was no light coming through whatsoever.

Laura

And that's also something you could pick up once you get to a location. because everywhere is going to have it.

Shanna

Exactly.

Laura

It reminds me of something someone taught me with trips is like, don't pack a bunch of diapers. Just buy them when you get there.

Shanna

Oh, yeah. Smart.

Laura

Bonus hack right there.

Shanna

Yeah. Love it. All right. What's your next hack?

Laura

OK. So for people who use a Hawkeye breast pump, do you know what I'm talking about?

Shanna

Did you ever use those? Oh, yes. That's the main way I got any pumped milk the second time around.

Laura

Oh, really? So it's for people who don't know, it's like a soft silicone. They call it a pump, but it's really not a pump in the true sense of it because it's more of just like a suction device, right? That you kind of adhere and suction to your breasts when you're usually like when you're nursing on the other side or if you need to catch like a letdown when you're nursing on the other side or if you have like engorged breasts at the beginning, that sort of thing. And the haka is great for that, especially for if you have a strong letdown on your non-used side while you're nursing on the other side, but babies like to kick it off your boob.

Shanna

Yes, I remember that.

Laura

There's nothing worse than not only a baby kicking something suctioned onto your boob off, like right off, and then spilling all that milk that you work so hard for onto the floor.

Shanna

Yes.

Laura

So there's a hack. I saw this on a website called Mums Grapevine, but it's just two rubber bands or you can use hair ties and you kind of like figure eight them around each other. You know how you do that? You can like secure two rubber bands together that way.

Shanna

Yes.

Laura

Yes. And you put one around the clip in your nursing bra up top, and then you put one around the haka, and it creates like a sling to keep the haka on. So if the baby kicks it off, it just kind of dangles and doesn't spill everything.

Shanna

Oh, that's brilliant. I needed that hack. I'm pretty sure Cece kicked that thing off of me at least once and probably in my bed.

Laura

That's the other thing, get it all over your sheets. So we'll post a link to this in our show notes on our website for people to see. but super helpful. Very helpful. Okay. So do you have another one for us?

Shanna

Oh, I do. My next hack is to get yourself a fold up picnic blanket. It just like rolls up, folds up and velcros together and it has its own handle, it's its own carrying device and bring it to the playground every time you go to the playground because you always need a place to sit with your kids to have a snack. At least I do. Like that's like one of the biggest activities we do when we go to the park is just sit and have snacks and half the time the benches are in the sun or they're taken up by other people or they're just gross. So I bring this everywhere I go and then we just find a tree, lay it down, we can all sit on it and have our snack and it It just increases the pleasure and joy of playground time by always bringing this thing along. And it's totally convenient, and I love it.

Laura

I got a good one from Amazon recently that's like, it's kind of like plasticized, you know? So it doesn't get wet when you put it down on the ground, which is really nice.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

I feel like I always pick the parks that overwater the grass. You sit down and your butt's all wet.

Shanna

Yes, yes, that's the kind I have too. So that's a great additional tip. Get one of those more waterproof kind so you can sit anywhere, even in a giant puddle of sprinkler water. Anyway, all right, what do you got for us?

Laura

Okay, so this next one I have is if you have a twiddler of a baby when you're nursing. What does that mean? So a lot of babies are very into like playing when they're nursing, right? They get like this tag obsession phase, right? It's like that related to that. But a lot of moms complain because their babies choose to play with their other nipple while they're nursing. If it's not covered up, if you're like, you know, doing sideline nursing in bed or something, or for whatever reason, your other breast isn't covered up. This is a common thing I've heard about, right? Is that other, is that kids are twiddling. And I think it really annoys moms. Apparently, there's like a reason it happens. It can help with the let down on the other side and whatnot. But personally, I'm not into it. I do not want my baby like playing around with my nipple at all. Like, no, thank you.

Shanna

Yes, out.

Laura

Yeah.

Shanna

That's great. I love that idea. Yeah.

Laura

Yeah. So I think we maybe have time for one more each. We've been doing a lot of rapid fire hacks, trying to help everyone out. But I was thinking, should we take a quick break and then come back with our last hacks?

Shanna

Okay. I like that idea.

Laura

Okay.

Shanna

Okay, here's my final hack. It might be my favorite. So whenever I'm trying to get cooperation from CeCe and I did this with Elle when she was younger too, and she's not cooperating like let's say I'm trying to put on her pajamas or put on her diaper before a nap or you know something I need to get done to her body with clothing or whatever and it's just like not happening. And I started doing this when Cece was really young too. I do this thing where I get very serious and focused and I look her in the eye and I'm like, hey Cece, I have a question for you. And that like gets her attention. She's like, huh? And I'm like, would you rather be a cat or a dog? And she's like, dog. And then I'm like, okay, good. Would you rather be a horse or a cow? cow, you know? And I just start asking her these questions and having this conversation with her and giving her the opportunity to answer back.

Laura

Well, and it gets that connection, like you said, they're probably craving like that might be part of the reason they're resisting so much is like they need a reset.

Shanna

And I think it's cool too, because so much of the time when we do try to connect with them in those situations or at least speaking for myself, it's like, I really need your help right now. I need you to cooperate. It's really important that we get the jammies like they hear these instructions. Over and over and over and to like completely take it into the left field and talk about something they're totally not expecting and you know things they probably think about in like it's a little bit different and so it changes the pace in the tone a little bit totally all right what's your last mom hack.

Laura

Okay, my last mom hack is if you are breastfeeding, learn hand expression. Yes. So I don't think this is a thing that's talked about enough. And it actually was a topic of a Milk Minute podcast episode recently, episode 67, which like I love you should go listen to it because it's like such a simple thing. That seems really confusing, but once you figure it out for yourself, it's really not that hard, and it can totally save you in a pinch. Back with Augie, the first time I went out with a friend, I was getting engorged, and I hand expressed into the sink of a restaurant. I remember that story, yes. I rinsed it out really well. But it can help you with that. In the Milkman podcast, they mentioned you never know. You might get stuck in an elevator and need to do it. You never know what life's going to throw at you. And this is just a simple thing you can have in your tool belt.

Shanna

Yeah. And do you have tips on how to do hand expressing or where to learn?

Laura

So go listen to that Milk Minute podcast episode, episode 67, because they do a much better job than their actual experts. For me, I do an underhand technique, but other people do overhand. I also learned from their Stanford like baby center put out like a video. So we'll link to that. But yeah, there's a lot of resources out there to learn and you just kind of have to feel it out for yourself because everyone is going to be different in how they do it. But it can be done for everyone, I believe.

Shanna

Awesome. I never once did that when I was breastfeeding. No, never even occurred to me. See, there you go. Yeah. Well, thanks for spreading the knowledge, Laura.

Laura

Anyway, I'm exhausted from spreading all this knowledge. I think we should move on to our BFPs of the events.

Shanna

Yes, let's do it.

Laura

Okay.

Shanna

All right, it's that time of the week for our BFPs or BFNs. Laura, you are up first. What do you have this week? I have a BFP. Oh, okay. Tell us all about it. My BFP is oat milk. Oat milk.

Laura

Okay. All right. Why is that your BFP? Okay. So I didn't have a chance to talk about this in my check-in because there was so much to talk about. One change this week is that I actually decided to go dairy-free. Oh, why is that? Which I know is something that you had to do with CeCe when you were breastfeeding. And with L. And with L. Oh, I forgot about with L. Yeah. And so, you know, Sebastian's reflux is terrible. And we had talked about Santa for his syndrome and how he was arching and stuff. And so I thought, you know what, like it's possible he has a, you know, dairy intolerance or allergy or whatnot. And maybe I should just give it a try and like give it two weeks and see if me cutting out dairy might actually make a difference with his reflux.

Shanna

Okay. So did you come to this decision yourself or did you talk to your pediatrician or your mom or something?

Laura

Well, you know what happened? I ate a big bowl of chocolate ice cream one night and then went to dream feed him and he spit up a ton.

Shanna

Yes, that's helpful.

Laura

A lot of dairy-free things. You know, if you just get something that's vegan, you know it's dairy-free, which is nice. So,

Shanna

And there are a lot of really yummy dairy-free ice creams nowadays. That was one thing I didn't have to sacrifice really, because I really like vegan ice cream. It was yummy. Did you have a kind you like specifically? The coconut milk one. I don't know the brand name of it, but it was made with coconut milk, I believe. Super delish.

Laura

I'll have to look for that. You know what's funny? I kind of overdid the ice cream anyway. Ice cream is not what I was worried about, but I was really worried about my milk and my coffee in the morning, to be honest. I used to drink black coffee, but I've moved away from that. I love a very milky cup of coffee in the morning. You know, soy milk's okay, almond milk's okay, but it's never really done it for me. And I've heard so much about oat milk, but I never tried it. And a friend of mine who is both dairy and soy free because her son has really bad reflux, she told me to get oat milk. So I went to Whole Foods and I got the Oatly brand, like full fat oat milk. And oh my God, it's amazing. Really? It tastes good? It tastes good. I actually prefer it to cow's milk now. Ooh, that's exciting.

Shanna

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Laura

It's just- Does it have a different flavor to it that you like? Well, you know, it tastes a lot like cow's milk, but it's like a little sweeter. It has a little bit of like an ody, earthy taste to it, I guess, but it's hard to describe, I guess. Smooth, it's really smooth. And it foams up really well. Like if you shake it, you get like a nice layer of foam on top. So it feels like you're drinking a latte. So I really like that. And I just, nutritionally, it doesn't have as much cholesterol in it, which, you know, like my doctors are always telling me to watch out for because I kind of have high cholesterol. So that's a bonus. And it's about the same price as getting a half gallon of like the organic blah blah blah fancy milk. So it's not that different price wise. So yeah, I'm kind of obsessed. Cool. That sounds like a great find. So oat milk.

Shanna

You're kind of converting me. I'm a half and half in my coffee everyday kind of person. I don't need a ton of half and half, but I need some. And there is like the cholesterol and fat and, you know, all of that with half and half. So maybe oat milk might be a good alternative for me. You should give it a try.

Laura

You never know. And I wonder, they have so many substitutes. I wonder if they have like a creamer that's made out of oat milk.

Shanna

Oh, I bet they do. Mm-hmm. Whole foods would probably be the place to check for that.

Laura

Yeah, for sure. I'm gonna look next time I'm there. But yeah, oat milk. So I'm sure many of our listeners are having to go dairy-free because it's like a really common thing that people have to do during breastfeeding.

Shanna

Mm-hmm.

Laura

So if you're listening and you're dairy-free and you're suffering, like try to find that oat milk for your morning coffee. So good. Hot tip. So yeah, that's my BFP. How about you? Do you have a BFP or a BFN? I have a BFN that turns into a BFP.

Shanna

Okay.

Laura

Like you're not talking about like a little kiddie pool. You're talking about Like six feet or something like that.

Shanna

It's eight feet round and a few feet deep, maybe like two feet deep. It's not super deep, but you know, it's enough for L to like swim and kick and yeah, more substantial than a kiddie pool and a big hit in our house. L loves it. It's just like, She's such a water baby. She loves to swim. And so this was a great solution for us during the pandemic. Well, come this summer we busted it out again and set it up in our backyard. And the thing about these above ground pools is like everywhere. It's like must be set up on perfectly level ground. Like we knew this. And our yard is not perfectly level. Like our backyard kind of slopes down towards the house. Sure. But we're like fuck it. I mean, we're not going to like level the backyard for this thing. Yeah. I mean, it's very slight. It's very slight. You wouldn't notice it, right? Like just looking out at my yard, you wouldn't notice it.

Laura

Oh no!

Shanna

I know, but look, she's in like a pool floaty ring, just like trying to have a good time. The pool is completely lopsided, so what started happening is so interesting, gravity started pulling the water down towards the sloped edge, like way more than it did last year. So we must have set the pool up wrong this year. Okay, so that's that day. Here, let me send you a picture of the next day. We woke up in the morning to see this. Oh, no. Is there still water in it? There's some water in it, but like 50% of the water just burst out or overflowed overnight. Like gravity pulled it so far that it pulled it over the edge of the pool. And now the pool is half flat.

Laura

It kind of looks like a used condom, like a giant used condom.

Shanna

Well, here's a picture of my kids playing in the gross use condom because they did not care. They were like, ooh, splash pad. So there is that. But here it is the next day. Oh, it's so sad. It's completely empty. Elle is still on her floaty ring in it. Try and have a good time. It's just flat as a pancake. It's dead, DEAD, dead. All the water came out. And it was just a complete disaster.

Laura

That's, that's a problem. Okay. But you said this turned into a BFP. So I'm desperate to know how, because this just looks like a real negative to me.

Shanna

Yes. Yes. So I'm like, well, we need a pool. We don't need a pool, but I want a pool. And so I was like, we're gonna buy a different type of pool. I'm gonna buy a rectangular one because if we jam it towards the most northern end of our yard, maybe there won't be that much slant and we can figure this out.

Laura

Yeah, because leveling your yard is a big to do.

Shanna

Yeah, yeah, exactly. And putting all that trouble into something like that is a guaranteed way for my kid to lose interest in this pool. Like, you know what I mean? Like, as soon as I'm done doing all that work, she'll be like, I don't like swimming anymore.

Laura

Yeah, for sure. I never want to touch water again. I'm scared of water.

Shanna

Yes, that's that's what it would be. So I'm not going to put that much effort. So anyway, I found another in-text pool. It wasn't that expensive. It's a rectangle. It's about eight and a half feet by like five and a half feet. And so I bought this one. It's a little more sturdy and it's a perfect fit in our pool area. We have like a little gated pool area in our backyard. And we filled it up and it is Perfection. It's just so much better. Like the water isn't tilting to one side. Like Steve put some wood under a couple of like the legs of the pool and it kind of helps level it out a little bit. And we were able to, you know, have a workaround for the leveling on it. And it's wonderful. Here, let me send you a picture of our new pool.

Laura

Okay, please. Because I need to wipe that sad deflated pool out of my mind. Yes. Okay, let's see. Oh, would you look at that? It's upright.

Shanna

Amazing. That's a start. That's a win right there. Yeah. No, that looks great. It looks bigger too. I think it's bigger and it's nice since it's a rectangle. She can swim from end to end. you know, do more swimming practice. And it's just better all around. It's just a better pool for our yard. And so it ended up being like a happy accident. We got something better in the end. And she loves it every day. And the afternoon is swimming time. We go out there every day. She gets exercise. I say she because Cece is not into the pool. Like she does not really want to get in the water. She'll come in the pool area with us and play around. Like I have a tiny toddler. Splash pool and she'll fill that up and stuff, but it's too cold for her the big one You know she's not that into it, but L loves it.

Laura

I was gonna say what's the temperature situation for this big pool.

Shanna

It's kind of cold I don't really love getting in it cuz I'm a sissy when it comes to that stuff L doesn't care half the time her lips are blue and she's chattering as she's Swimming but I'd say it's maybe like in the 60s the temperature probably like the temp of the air at night, you know, yeah, yeah Wow I know kids are so resilient. It's amazing.

Laura

Oh, Augie would not care. I mean, if you recall when he went to the beach, he was like turning purple and he was like, I want to sit in the water.

Shanna

Oh, they're so amazing. So yeah, that's our story this week. BFN turned BFP.

Laura

Bye bye pool. Yeah, bye bye pool. Oh, you were fun during the pandemic.

Laura

But anyway, I think we should say bye-bye pool and also bye-bye listeners because we've been talking a long time and it's time to wrap it up.

Shanna

Yes. Listeners, do you have any mom hacks or parenting hacks you want to share with us? Please send them our way. Laura, where can everyone reach us?

Laura

We're on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok at BFP Podcast. We have a website, BigPapPositivePodcast.com. If you want to send us an email, you know you can always include a voice memo in that email. Just send it to contact at bigfappositivepodcast.com. And finally, if you want to join the most amazing, supportive group of people on the internet, just search Facebook for Big Fat Positive Community. Request to join and make sure you answer the two membership questions so I know you're not a robot. And we'll send you straight through to all the amazing conversations we're having in there.

Shanna

If you love our show, please rate and review us wherever you listen to podcasts. Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Thanks for listening, everyone. Bye. Bye.