Preparing Your Toddler for Preschool – Ep. 157

Shanna

Hi, welcome to Big Fat Positive with Shanna and Laura. On this week's episode, we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, OMG, I'm freaking out, where we get into the topics of sleep, sand, and savants, and we wrap it up with our weekly BFPs and BFNs. Let's get to it. Hello, everybody. Welcome to episode 157. Hi, Laura. Hi, Shanna. How are you doing?

Laura

How old is everyone and what's going on over there? So, Sebastian, 17 weeks and Augie is approaching two and a half. Mm-hmm. And yeah, so this week, one thing I wanted to note is, do you remember a couple episodes ago you were talking about how CeCe was like saying, Daddy move and like... Yes. Yes. Okay. Mm-hmm. So very eerily, not really all that eerie because we know that our kids are very close together developmentally and age and personality sometimes. Uh-huh. Augie also started Daddy Move this week. Like, what? Yeah, he wants Corey to like leave the room sometimes. So it's just us and yeah. Oh no. And it's also hurting Corey's feelings a bit, you know, because he works so hard taking care of him, especially because I've been sort of on baby duty a lot. And so I think he and Augie have had a really close relationship. But yeah, this last week, he's just like, daddy move, daddy leave.

Shanna

Man, is it also correlating with a more intense mommy phase?

Laura

Yeah. Well, his intense mommy phase, I think, is ongoing, you know? Like, ever since the baby was born, I think there's some jealousy there that he doesn't even recognize as jealousy, you know? He just knows that he doesn't get as much one-on-one time as he used to, and so he demands it, right? One thing he's been doing is when I come out with Sebastian in the morning when I emerge from the bedroom, he goes, Daddy, take Sebastian. Daddy, take baby. He like literally is trying to like move the baby into Cory's arms so that I can. He's actually trying to do that. Like he's trying to walk over and pick him up and move him over to Cory.

Shanna

I visualize how it might look and it reminds me of how my girls like to try to pick up the dogs and like drag them to another room or outside. I'm like, don't do that, don't do that, like you're too small and these big, like the proportions are off. And I imagine you don't actually let Augie pick up Sebastian and drag him over to daddy. I do not.

Laura

We haven't gotten there yet. So yeah, I just wanted to let you know you're not alone with the daddy move thing. It's happening at our house too. Steve will be happy to hear that. Yes, yes. Tell Steve it's not personal.

Shanna

I thought it came around seven months, eight months. This is my foggy memory of infancy, but when does it usually kick in?

Laura

I don't remember. That sounds about right too. Like six, seven months, somewhere where they kind of realize that you are a separate person from them. Like there's a thing that happened, I think, around six months where the babies kind of realized like, oh, mommy and I are not the same being. She can't walk away. And that's kind of where separation anxiety can begin. But I feel like it was like nine months was a really bad time for it. with Augie. But yeah, four months, that took me by surprise.

Shanna

I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that he's a pandemic baby and just hasn't had a lot of exposure beyond you and your immediate family.

Laura

Sure, but that doesn't explain why he cries when Cory's holding him, you know? Wow, Cory's really in the doghouse this week with your kids. I know, and he's such a good dad, poor guy. I'm so sad.

Shanna

Oh, yes, he's already starting that little sibling emulation.

Laura

But the other question is whether it's related to this next thing I want to talk about, my final topic for the week, which is the four month sleep regression. Oh, no, not that. Yeah, it was a belated birthday present for me from Sebastian. Aw, how nice of him. So nice of him. He was sleeping really pretty well. He was like waking up once a night, maybe at like three or four AM. Occasionally, he'd just be sleeping from his dream feed at 10.30 all the way to 6.30 or 7. And I'd wake up with my boobs enormous and leaking, but I didn't care because I got a full night's sleep. And I was like, yay, this is awesome. Two, I swear overnight waking up every one to two hours like a freaking newborn.

Shanna

No. Oh my goodness. Did you have to nurse them every time or how did you handle that?

Laura

No. Thankfully, I remembered my teachings from my first child in my mommy and me class when they taught us about the four month regression or as they called it, the cognitive leap. Our teacher always said, what you need to do is try to maintain the same routines that you had before. If I fed him at 3 AM, you can still feed him at 3 AM, but try to soothe him in other ways before you resort to that. Because otherwise, you're going to end up with new sleep crutches, right? You're introducing more feedings and all this stuff, right? So I did end up feeding him a little bit more than usual, but I have to say I had pretty good success with replacing the pacifier over and over. Okay, so that's your technique, okay? So yeah, I'm not nursing as much, but the thing is, it's not that he's even waking up hungry.

Shanna

But he definitely doesn't sound mad, which is a good thing. It's not like upset crying. So that's great.

Laura

Exactly. It's not like screaming crying upset. He's just like, I just want to talk. He loves his little voice. He does. I do too. It's really cute But he actually would get back to sleep like he'd go back to sleep if I put the pacifier in or and like and or kept my hand on his chest But I had to keep doing that so I was like zombie like you know reaching over and putting it back in and the snoo helped But I feel like I should show you the snoo log from yes the night before and the night after Okay, so they maybe don't look all that different, but I'm gonna talk you through it Okay. These both look kind of bad to me. I see a lot of red. A lot of red. But do you see the first one I sent you, he slept from midnight all the way till 6.20 a.m., right? There's red in there, but those are just little soothing moments, right? Okay. I think I had the settings set too high.

Shanna

Yeah, I like the idea that it's his choice. He's just been thinking about it since the day he was born. He's like, I think I'm going to aim for the day after I turn four months old, really stick it to my mom after her birthday. Yeah. Yeah. Does this get you really motivated to sleep train soon? Or what's your thoughts on that in the future?

Laura

Yeah. I mean, I think I'm going to wait till five months at least. I want to wait till we're in the new house too. So like, yeah, there's some things I want to wait for. Also, like I'm strangely sentimental this time around and not like rushing to sleep train because I'm like, he's my last baby. And I love having him right next to me when I'm. the sleep and how sweet it is and all that stuff of course if you like ask me this at 3am when he's crying and wanting to nurse for the 50 millionth time i'd probably be like when can we get that crib set up yeah yeah but i don't know so that's a little bit down the line well about a month i guess so we'll see we'll see

Shanna

Okay.

Laura

I am eager to get more sleep though, so I'm sure that will win out in the end. Yeah. Yeah. But anyway, that is my week. Shanna, I want to hear about you, how old are your kiddos, and what's going on with you this week? All right.

Shanna

Well, Cece is almost two and a half, just a few days shy. Just a few days. Yes, and Ella's still five, almost five and a half. And the big thing for us this week is I started on the journey to find CeCe, a preschool.

Laura

I'm just like, where are the kids supposed to go? Like seriously, where are the kids supposed to go? I don't understand.

Shanna

I didn't understand either. It was just one of those things where I was like, okay, great. Go ahead and put me on the list. And I hung up. I was like, that's never going to happen.

Laura

That makes me question like how much they actually know about the needs of families because it's like that is outrageous. Yes. Yes. The only people who do that are people who can afford private babysitters or have family nearby. This is wild to me. It blows me away.

Shanna

Right. And I'm also just like, why do we need to be there for two and a half hours? I get the gist of a preschool and what it's about. And within 15 minutes, I think.

Laura

Yeah. Can you imagine? There must be so many people who show up five minutes and they're like, oh, this is not for us. And then it's like, well, shit. Yeah. I'm stuck here. I'm going to look like a jerk if I leave.

Shanna

Oh my goodness.

Laura

I paid for a babysitter for two and a half hours.

Shanna

I ditched that place and go have lunch. Yeah.

Laura

Yeah.

Shanna

Yeah. So I hit a lot of dead ends. I have a couple of possibilities. One of them is a preschool nearby that I've heard of. And it's a co-op.

Laura

Are you familiar with preschool co-ops at all? I am. I've looked into it. There's actually one on our street, like literally at the end of the block. And everyone loves it. It's one of those ones that always shows up in the mom group discussions. But I realize like I'm moving. So I'm not about to like... Oh, right. I think that would suck so bad to have to go to a co-op that's like on your old street and you have to drive so far to get to it. So... Yes, but for our listeners who've never heard of co-ops, do you want to explain how they work? Because I kind of know how they work, but I have to say I don't know all the ins and outs.

Shanna

Yeah, what I gather about this school is that there is a teacher, there's a lead teacher, but it's a nonprofit organization and the entire school basically runs on parental involvement. So like if you sign up for this school, you pay a low monthly fee like significantly lower than other regular preschools, but you have to commit one of the parents has to volunteer in the classroom once a week. So it runs with the teacher, but then the support is all parents. So there's like five parents there every day. And you just kind of help the school run. You could volunteer also to be like the new member coordinator or whatever other like treasurer or whatever other auxiliary roles they have. So it's a big community feel, a lot of parental involvement. And it sounds really neat, but I'm hesitant because we both have full-time jobs. So what am I going to do? I don't know.

Laura

Yeah, that was my follow-up question. Like, how do you make it work if you also work, right?

Shanna

Yeah, that's a good question. The thing about this one is it's just part-time. It's four hours a day. So the shift would be four hours. And You know, I don't know. I haven't toured it yet. I don't know if I'm going to. But I kind of like the idea of getting her into something part time just because she's been at home this whole time and like, you know, spent the last year and a half of her life in quarantine, basically. And I want to ease her into school. I don't think I want to put her in something full time. And the parental involvement would be nice, you know, a nice transition to get her into school. And so I don't know. It's all up in the air, but I'm on the mission. Well, you definitely need to keep it posted because it's such a big deal.

Laura

Wow. Anyway, it is overwhelming and I really look forward to hearing how these pan out and which one you pick. Yeah, yeah. And if you even get to go tour any of them.

Shanna

fingers crossed. I hope there's any space left in any of them because I really want her to have the preschool experience starting in the fall. Really do. Yeah. But yeah, that's pretty much all for us this week. Should we move on to our special segment? Oh yeah, I think we do. I think it's going to be a good one. All right.

Laura

And we are back, so our special segment this week is OMG I Am Freaking Out, which is our regular segment where we get to unload all the things that are freaking us out at this very moment, parenting related, of course. But I wanna hear what you're freaking out about related to parenting this week.

Shanna

This week I am freaking out about sand.

Laura

Okay, so I actually, I'm laughing because there was recently a heated discussion about this in my alumni moms group about sand. So I think I may understand where you're coming from, but I'm also laughing because you happen to have a fucking gigantic sandbox in your backyard.

Shanna

It's huge. Let's remind everyone that it has a literal ton of sand. A literal ton. 2,500 pounds of sand that I carried back there with my own arms and hands. Let's not forget that detail. And everyone knows I'm not actually a big fan of sand, but this freak out doesn't have anything to do with the annoying aspect of sand. What it has to do with, and maybe this is in the zeitgeist right now because I came across it in a mom's group too, apparently there's safe and unsafe sand that I was not aware of when I carried 2,500 pounds of sand into my backyard. Someone posted a post like, I'm getting a sandbox in my backyard, is it worth it for me to get this particular type of play sand. And it's a bag of sand that's about $35 for 20 pounds of sand, okay?

Laura

Well, I can do the math on that, although maybe you've already done it for me.

Shanna

Oh, I have. If I filled my giant sandbox with this special sand, it would cost $4,375.

Laura

I'll argue that it wasn't free and that it took you two full days of labor.

Shanna

Oh God, yes. Yes.

Laura

But yes, the materials were free provided to you.

Shanna

Yes. Point being, someone was willing to give it away for free. So I don't imagine this person spent almost five grand on sand only to just give it to some random stranger for free. So I think this person probably filled their sandbox with regular old sand from Home Depot, which is $3 a bag for 50 pounds. So that means you could fill that entire sandbox for $150. So I think that's what I'm working with here.

Laura

I think that's a safe assumption. I feel like they would have told you, oh, and by the way, this is the most premium organic play sand. They would have told you that.

Shanna

Exactly. From the Bahamas. I should mention this. It's called Baha Place and because it's literally imported from the Bahamas.

Laura

There's some beach in the Bahamas that's like bare now. It just rocks.

Shanna

God, that's really depressing. That's really sad. Go on, sorry. Another thing to freak out about, jeez Louise. Okay, so anyway, here's the deal with sand. Regular sand like this Home Depot bag is made by grinding up quartz crystal, otherwise known as silica. Like you grind it up and that makes the sand. And what it also makes is a lot of dust. And apparently silica dust is horrible for your lungs. So the kids are out there playing in the sand, and I've seen it, right? When the sand is dry, they're playing in it, and it's just wafting these big clouds of dust. And before, it was just annoying to me. I'm like, oh, get out of the way. I need to get out of the way of this. Dust is going to get my skin dusty. And now I'm like, we all need to get out of the way of this dust. We're going to inhale it. Our lungs are going to turn black. I mean, apparently it causes lung disease or something.

Laura

That was my first thought because otherwise you're gonna have to pay someone to haul that away. I know. I know you're not gonna like hoisted upon some other unsuspecting mom. Right. This sand is not safe for my kids, but you take it.

Shanna

Yeah. Yeah, you go take it. I won't say anything. But also it's like what kind of sand do they use at the parks?

Laura

I think they use the silica sand, don't you think? Yeah. City, you know, parks and recreation isn't buying $20 bag sand. Yes. $34 a bag. Well, I have to say, I don't have an answer for this because I saw the discussion and I was like, I don't have a sandpit. It's not a big deal. But yeah, that is distressing. You know what? It just goes to show it's like everything's going to kill you. You know, it's like, you just can't win. You just can't win.

Shanna

You really feel that way a lot as a mom too. I mean, I felt that way before having kids, but now it's just like really in my life, I'm now like stressing out about sand. I never thought that I would be here in my life.

Laura

Ten years ago, one of your big worries, Shanna, ten years in the future is going to be safe.

Shanna

Ten years ago, my biggest worry was that Chili, my dog, got up on the table, ate an entire box of Belgian chocolates, and had to go have a stomach pump at the vet. Chili.

Laura

Chili.

Shanna

And here we are. So this is unresolved. I don't know what I'm going to do. But I am a little bit freaked out about it right now. Listeners, please write in. Tell us about it. Tell us what you know. We need to know. Please. We need to know. All right, Laura, what are you freaking out about this week? OK.

Laura

So I am freaking out about the fact that I'm worried Augie is just dropping his nap altogether.

Shanna

Oh, that's terrifying. I could see why you would be freaking out about that.

Laura

I'm valiantly trying to maintain this nap, right? Like, I've talked about it a ton on the show. Everyone's probably sick of hearing about Augie's naps, but I am like dedicated to making sure he gets his rest. However, we're kind of at the point where like, I want to say five days out of the week. He doesn't know. And then there are these weird days where he like takes forever to nap and then he falls asleep at like three. Like right when I'm about to go get him from quiet time and then I don't know when to wake him up and everything screwed up. And I have turned to the internet for help, of course, and looked at all these previous conversations in my mom's groups and then like asked questions and there's always the person who comes in and says, well, my kid just flat out stopped napping at two and a half. Like there was nothing I could do. I tried and tried.

Shanna

So what is the biggest fear about it that you are just gonna have to continue to entertain him during that time instead of having you time?

Laura

And to be fair, it's not all selfish. I'd say it's like 80% selfish 20% like he's kind of a wreck on the days he doesn't nap so I think he physiologically still needs it. Mentally, I don't know if he does, and he doesn't want to do it. It's becoming harder and harder to put him down. There's lots of wrestling and fighting. But then there's some days where he just passes out. It's so weird. I just don't know. I just don't get it.

Shanna

Yeah, it's like the sleep deprivation builds up and then he just crashes.

Laura

So how did Elle end up dropping her nap in the end? How old was she? What happened?

Shanna

Well, you're going to hate me. She dropped it when she was four. Well, no, I don't hate you. That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you. But here's the thing. I think she would have been ready earlier, but she was going to preschool every single day. And they were pretty insistent on nap time, like all the kids nap. And it was completely screwing up bedtime at night. She would snap in the middle of the day at school for like two hours and then come home and stay awake until 10pm. And I was going crazy. I was like, stop it. Stop letting her nap so long because this is not good. So once she Once pandemic hit and she was home, she did not want a nap. She just didn't need to anymore. So she stopped it and her nighttime sleep adjusted. She goes to bed now around 7 7 30 and sleeps to like 6 30.

Laura

I mean, he's getting like 11 hours of sleep, I want to say at night. So it's kind of like 7.30 to 8, you know, 7.30 or 8 for bedtime. We want it earlier, but it's just so hard, especially with the baby. And then he wakes up between 6.30 and 7 usually most days. Which seems normal. I mean, I guess maybe, sure, if that's the silver lining I can look forward to, like him sleeping more at night, maybe that'll help me feel less freaked out about it. Yeah. But yeah, it's, it's just, I know that it's a transition we're going to have to go through eventually, but I'm not ready. Yeah.

Shanna

Well, the obvious solution is just put him in a full-time preschool and then let them deal with it.

Laura

I mean, honestly, that kind of is my next plan of attack. Because I've heard that preschools are like magic at getting kids to nap.

Shanna

Oh, they are. They're wizards. They know how to do it. And it's the peer pressure. All the other kids are napping. I was always shocked how much Elle napped at school. On the floor, on a mat, like they... Bright sunlight. Her preschool had floor to ceiling windows. your sunlight and she's just like for two hours.

Laura

Meanwhile, we're like the exact white noise on loop and hit the perfect sleep sack. The temperature has to be regular. Just right. Yes. I have the exact two songs. We sing him and blackout curtains with no peaking light. Okay. Well, I think that might be a good plan. Plus, you know, I'm looking forward to him getting into school, too. So yeah, we shall see. OK. So do you have another OMGM freaking out for us?

Shanna

OK, I have been freaking out lately that I have missed the window of opportunity to get my kids involved in either sport or music or arts or something to develop there. prodigious nature to become prodigies, if you will, in something. You know what I mean? I feel like when you see Olympic gymnasts, it's like, I've been doing that since I was two years old. Or musicians, like I started singing when I was three. And my kid has been at home, at most, like bouncing on a cheap bounce house that I blow up in my living room. Like that's the level of athleticism we've got going on here. They sing into a karaoke microphone. pretty off key. I haven't put them in anything and trained them in anything yet. And I'm like, have I missed this window of opportunity? And are they screwed? Are they going to join classes later and everyone's going to be ahead of them? I'm just spiraling on this whole thing.

Laura

Okay. So you Think that there was a chance that your children might have some kind of like prodigy level skill, but you don't know about it because you just haven't gotten them into the right class yet and yes such you've missed the window for either Olympic gold or like Getting an egot some day Yes, I see I see

Shanna

Yeah, especially Elle. You know, she's five and a half now.

Laura

And I feel like a two and a half CECE still has a little time. And she's not quite past her prime yet.

Shanna

Well, there are classes, soccer classes that two year olds are in. So if I get her in a soccer class when she's three, is she going to be behind everyone else? I mean, I know this sounds like kind of ridiculous, but I'm also like, I don't know, I don't want them to be insecure when they finally do join extracurricular activities because everyone else has already been doing it since they were born, basically.

Laura

So I get this freak out. I think I'm going to play a little armchair psychologist here and say that this might stem from the fact that you and I were both raised in an era of where trophies were very desirable and where we were also overachievers. I wasn't overachiever, so were you, right? I think that might be why you think this might be a valuable thing, right? Because we think that it's a good thing to have these, like, prodigious talents. I'm gonna be that person who says it's not. And it's fine if your kids are average or not, it's good. Because, I mean, are people happy who have to spend their entire childhoods training for the Olympics?

Laura

Okay. No, they're just running around kicking balls and the parents are all taking pictures because it's freaking adorable. Yeah. But you know what? I have wondered about this. I haven't freaked out about it, but I have wondered about it and had similar thoughts because I think about like Beyonce and how they're like, oh, at three, she was such a good singer. And it's like, do you know what I mean? Like, you have to know when you have a kid like that, right? They must be so far beyond what all the other kids are doing or something. You know what I mean? Like it must be so obvious. So I also feel like if your kids had some kind of natural innate ability that was going to make them the top of their field in performing arts or athletics, you might have noticed already. You know what I mean? Okay. So you're saying they're not talented?

Shanna

I'm not actually aiming for like Olympic level achievement. I'm definitely not that level of intense parent. And I do think that, you know, pushing a child into an activity before they're ready to choose if they really like it, you know, and making them commit to it can be a recipe for disappointment. on happiness and stuff, but I think about myself, if I'm playing armchair psychologist on myself, it's like I always wish I had a higher level of mastery of certain skills, you know, like I wish I were a better singer or a better actor when I was doing acting, like what could my life have been like if I had started those things when I was younger and developed those skills and confidence then, like, you know, I started those things later in life and Maybe I would have had just a different. I don't know. I don't even know what I'm trying to say.

Laura

Well, I think it's not too late to start. Obviously, your kids are not that old. And this also might be residual guilt about the pandemic, too, because you just haven't been able to do anything in the last year. Like, it was an extraordinary and weird year. I guarantee if we hadn't had the pandemic, you would have had, you know, CECE and adorable little baby soccer class or something or taking her to my gym and you could have been putting L into a choir or something. So, You know, a lot of this was out of your hands and you did the best you could.

Shanna

That's true. As far as like very intense interests and talents, I think Elle has actually shown that for swimming ever since she was really young, like loved water, loved swimming. You know, swimming class was awesome and stuff and we would go to the pool at the YMCA all the time and then everything shut down and. It's almost like that interest just got cut off completely because you can't really just go to swimming pools when everything's shut down. We don't have a pool. So yeah, I do feel sad about that. And I do think that plays a role in the fear I've been feeling. Yeah, definitely. So I hope you give yourself some grace on this one.

Laura

Yeah. Okay. I will. Thank you. All right, do you have another one for us? I do, and it involves a fun story, but I think we should take a break and come back with it. What do you think? Ooh, okay.

Shanna

All right, we're back. Laura, you have another OMGM freaking out and you said it involves a story. Now I am super curious. What do you got for us?

Laura

Yeah. So I'm not actually going to open with what I am freaking out about because I got to tell you the story first and figure it out. Okay. Okay. So the other day I had set up a play date with a family that lives in our new neighborhood. I had like joined a new mom's group and I was like looking forward to meeting some people in the area, you know, yada, yada, right? So, you know, I was doing this in anticipation of the move so that we have some neighborhood friends. By the time we get there, I thought I was being like such a proactive mom about this, right? So I got a direct message from a mom. Let's just call her Melissa. Melissa said, you know, she and her daughter Penelope we're going to be at this one park that's in the new neighborhood. And if we wanted to come by, we could meet them and hang out and check out a new park, right? I thought this was a great idea. So fun.

Shanna

We have to test him on some other situations. How do you test it? Well, for starters, we need to see if he knows other people's husband's names.

Laura

This is like all he's psychic about is like other daddy's names. That would be so specific and weird. That would be a really very specific skill set for a psychic.

Shanna

Well, if he is psychic, you guys could have a nice lucrative side income. You know, people pay big bucks, especially in LA for psychic readings.

Laura

Do you think it's too late? Like, have I missed my opportunity to get him into psychic classes?

Shanna

He'll never be Olympic level psychic.

Laura

You've missed the boat, Laura.

Shanna

Yes, I'm dying to know. Very fascinating, my goodness.

Laura

Well, that's it for me. Should we move on to our BFPs and our BFNs? Yeah, let's do it.

Shanna

All right, it is time for our weekly BFPs or BFNs. Laura, what do you have for us this week? I have a BFP. Oh, good. Okay.

Laura

What is it? It's sort of a multi-platform BFP. What it really is is a BFP about this woman. Her name is Casey Davis. She's a licensed professional counselor. And on Instagram, she's at StruggleCare. But on TikTok, she's domestic blisters, which I think is a very clever name. And she actually does a lot more on TikTok. But she wrote a little book called How to Keep House While Drowning, and it's subtitled 31 Days of Compassionate Help. And it's a book that's really focused towards people who are caregivers, especially moms, trying to help us figure out how to do all of our care tasks that we need to do, like taking care of kids and taking care of the house and cleaning and laundry and blah, blah, blah, while also taking care of ourselves. And I've been just really learning a lot from her TikTok mostly, but also I read her book and it's a really short book so it's really easy to read.

Shanna

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Laura

You deserve kindness regardless of you functioning. So even if you're not, you're not doing well, you deserve kindness. Another one is rest is a right, not a reward, which it's very hard for me to understand. Like, I always feel like I have to earn my rest. Uh-huh. Good enough, it's perfect is one of them. Okay. And then her final one is the one I want to talk about most, which is care tasks are morally neutral. And this is one that was the hardest for me to really wrap my brain around. But once I internalized it, it really kind of changed the way I went about my days. And I realized that we put a lot of moral value on whether we keep a clean house, right? If your dishes are dirty, it makes you feel like you might be a bad person or something. I can't be the only one because she obviously wrote a book about this and people react well to it.

Shanna

Okay. So I have a question then. Uh-huh. After being exposed to these ideas and learning from her, are you still doing spa roles with each individual burp cloth, washcloth, et cetera, what you were doing before. Or has that changed the way you think about that?

Laura

I am not. And here's why, because it was taking too much time. But also, I'm not because I do not have the time for it right now. But also, I'm not judging myself for having done it because I realized it was kind of like a creative release for me, as silly as that sounds. Like I was really enjoying the feeling of having control. over my burp claws. But yeah, no, now I'm like, okay, I just like I literally, I still roll them. I just don't spa roll them. But that's because it's easier to pull one out when they're rolled. And it's also been a thing where I tell Corey, because Corey would be like, I don't know how you fold these. Do you want me? And I'm like, it's not, it's not about the folding. Like just do it your way. It's fine. Like thank you for helping me, basically. But it actually has, it's kind of had a different effect from you.

Shanna

Awesome. I'm definitely going to have to check that out. I could definitely use some moral relief from some of the stuff that I've got going on in this messy old house of mine. Yes. And rest is a right. Yes, that's a good one to remember. Oh, indeed.

Laura

So yeah, that's my BFP. Shanna, do you have a BFP or a BFN for us? I also have a BFP. Oh, yay.

Shanna

It is life changing too, but not in the same way. Okay. It's a kitchen tool that I never knew existed and never knew I needed until I had kids. So I am very excited to say that I have purchased my very first cherry pitter.

Laura

Ooh. Very exciting. I feel like this is something you knew about and probably have. I don't have one. I know about it. But you know why I don't have one? Because we're not a big cherry family. What? Yeah. I know. I don't know what to say. Yeah.

Shanna

Yeah. Okay. Well, cherries are one of my favorite fruits. I love them. Summertime is like cherry season. That's when they come out in the store. So I've been buying them and I get really nervous giving them to the kids, especially CECE, of course, you know, two and a half, like First of all, they're round and chocable, and then they've got the pit in the middle. And I shit you not for like two years. I was taking a cherry, taking a paring knife and cutting it like an apple, like slicing off one side, slicing off the other, like doing this to like 20 cherries, right? And then serving them to the kids. And when someone posted this item in my mom's group recently, I was like, What? Oh my God, I could save so much time and like the old way is ridiculous. And it's so easy and cool.

Laura

It reminds me of my love of my grape cutter. It's such a uni-tasker, but I love the grape cutter. It just makes life so much easier. We still cut our grapes because Augie, he just shoves food in his mouth and forgets to chew sometimes. Yeah. We're a grape cutting family.

Shanna

Yeah. We still cut CECE's grapes too. I only cut them in half and like maybe eight at a time. I don't know. It just feels less intense and detail oriented than what I was doing with the cherries. You know, like just cutting four sides off of a tiny cherry just seems so crazy. And there was a lot to waste, you know. And now you can make cherry pie. I could. I've never made a pie. Wait, what? You've never made a pie? Never. Ever in my life. I'm speechless. You are. Yeah. You love baking. I like baking cakes and mostly what I like is decorating. I like the artistic aspect of it, which is why I love cakes. To me, pies don't have that element to it, and to be honest with you again, I don't really like pie that much. Like, I like it, but I don't love it. I will never choose pie if other things are available.

Shanna

It's like I don't even know you.

Laura

I know. After all these years, Laura, you just learned something new about me. I mean, it just goes to show you never know someone through and through. They can always surprise you.

Shanna

Yeah. Well, it's like if the topic doesn't come up, like I don't walk around with a banner like I hate pie or anything like that.

Laura

I have a vague memory of you telling me you were skeptical of my pumpkin pie and me being like, but I have the best pumpkin pie ever, and I don't know if that ever got resolved, but... I don't know if I actually ate your pumpkin pie, did I? I don't know. We're gonna have to resolve that. I'm gonna be that person who makes you try one bite, like you're a toddler.

Shanna

Just take a bite! You gotta try new foods, cause they might taste good. That's Daniel Tiger's jingle about it.

Laura

I was gonna say, that's gotta be Daniel Tiger. It is.

Shanna

Now listen, I will eat pie. It's not like I gag on it or anything, but of the pies, pumpkin pie is definitely my least favorite. Like I do not care for it at all. It has to be completely doused in like whipped cream.

Laura

Okay, all right. I take it that's a personal challenge then. All right.

Shanna

Well, we'll have to video it and Instagram it for our listeners. They are dying to see this content.

Laura

Yes, it's definitely the content they didn't know they needed.

Shanna

Yeah, exactly. Anyway, all right, listeners, if you have any other content you want us to share, reach out. If you have any OMGs, I'm freaking out. We want to hear them. Laura, where can everyone reach us?

Laura

We're on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok at BFBpodcast. We have a website, bigfatpositivepodcast.com. If you want to send us an email, you can always include a voice memo to that email. Just send it to contact at bigfatpositivepodcast.com. And if you want to join the coolest community group on the internet, just go to Facebook, search Big Fat Positive Community, request to join, answer those two pesky membership questions so we know you're not a robot, and then you'll be sent straight through to our awesome community of like-minded folks.

Shanna

If you love our show, please rate us and review us wherever you listen to podcasts. And spread the word. Tell your friends, colleagues, family about Big Fat Positive. Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Thanks so much for listening, everyone. Have a good week. Bye.