Dealing With Toddler Sleep Regression – Ep. 123

Laura

Hi, welcome to Big Fat Positive with Shanna and Laura. This week we have our weekly check-ins. We have our special segment, Throwback, where I tell a story about how my mom always knew what to do in every situation, and we close with our BFDs and BFNs. Let's get started!

Shanna

Okay. First off, she's 22 months and second off, I am exhausted because she is

Laura

Like how short?

Shanna

Oh, like 30 minutes.

Laura

Yeah, that's.

Shanna

And yeah. And she's the kind of kid that usually does not wake up happy.

Laura

in the morning. I'm sorry. I know it's AM. That's not the morning. That's the middle of the night.

Shanna

She's starting her day at 4.30 in the middle of the night.

Laura

What does she do? What do you do? Do you go in and get her? Do you let her just chill in her room?

Shanna

Well, Steve did the first one, and he is like, I tried to get her back to sleep, and she just wouldn't. do it. And so then he like laid on the carpet and kind of snoozed on and off while she just played all around him. I mean, she just started her day. And then I did the next day and similar thing is just like, okay, I guess this is what we're doing. And it's so, Laura, these days are so long already with Yeah. You know, just like we are on childcare the whole day while trying to work. And now she's waking up at 4.30. The day is endless.

Laura

Not OK. So here's a question. Like what time does she go to bed? How much sleep is she actually getting at night then?

Shanna

That's a good question. She's kind of resisting bedtime, so she'll sit and I don't know, fool around and stuff until probably like 7.30 or so. We try to get her down by 7. And so 7.30 to 4.30, what is that? I'd have to count on my fingers.

Laura

8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 1, 2, 3, 9 hours.

Shanna

9 hours, which is not good for adults. Yes, not good for a toddler. No. Which is probably why, yeah, she's cranky and unsettled and having more time at every bedtime because like you said, she doesn't have enough sleep. She's overtired and it's just not going well.

Laura

Because I think at this age they're supposed to have what, like 13 to 15 hours a day, something like that. All together. That sounds about right. Yeah. That's just off the top of my head, but I think that's about right. So she's working on a real deficit there. That sucks.

Shanna

Yeah, it's hard to fix. But of course, I'm like, well, we need to fix this. Yeah, I was just going to ask.

Laura

So what is your... I know you're not just like letting it slide. So what's happening? What is your plan?

Shanna

I looked up sleep regression around this time and you know, it's kind of a wide window. The experts are like 18 to 24 months sleep regression. And don't be scared of that. Six months sleep regression. I want to tell people not to be scared of that because I feel like at least for me it comes in waves. Like she had a little trouble at 18 months when her separation anxiety peaked and then it got better. And something's going on now. I don't know if it's teething and then that led to the sleep deprivation. I think it's just that sleep regressions can happen between all of that time.

Laura

Yeah, yeah. So are you just talking us up to the sleep regression and hoping it fixes itself or do you have like a plan of attack?

Shanna

I am chalking it up to the sleep regression and I know those past because I've been through this before with Elle, but I did consult the sleep experts online. Sorry, I don't have any specifics because my brain is mush. I don't remember where I found this information. A lot of it I'm already doing. Keep your bedtime routine the same. It's like, I know we do that. Calming activities. We haven't changed anything up. Avoid screens. No, we definitely don't do screens, especially at the end of the day with her. She doesn't even like screens. We know that.

Laura

Well, what about like light? Because I feel like they're always like, you know, like taking care of babies. She's always like, if you can see your hand in front of your face, it's too bright. But it's also like pitch black at 4 30 in the morning, especially this time of year in our on our latitude.

Shanna

Yes, I cannot chalk it up to that. Also, I have blackout curtains. two layers of blackout curtains. The outside light really doesn't get in. I will say she has one of those star projectors in her room that projects stars, that projects moons and stars up on her ceiling. And that lights up her room, but that's consistent throughout the night. It's not like it's popping on at 4.30. So one thing I read about was doing earlier bedtime. You know, you want to get them in bed before their sleepiness wears off. If you get to a certain point, adrenaline kicks in and they're wide awake. So I'm like, OK, clearly I need to push it earlier. She's tired anyway. So I had a plan. I was like, I'm going to attack this tonight and succeed.

Laura

You're like, victory is mine. I will make this work. Yes.

Shanna

I was very determined. So I started, you know, reading to her quite early, 6.15. We're in jammies, 6.30. It's like the lights are off. I'm singing to her as best I can. And by 6.45. She was very tired, right? She was yawning. I was like, good, I'm getting her when the melatonin is kicking in before the intranetal and this is perfect. I lay her down in bed and I left and everything was fine. There was no fight. She was calm. I listened on the monitor and within five minutes, she was asleep.

Laura

Wow. I was like, yes, I'm going to fix this problem. So, did she sleep all the way through the night?

Shanna

No, because about 10 minutes later, she sat up straight in her bed, screaming. Ah, CECE! Why? Screaming, I'll tell you. Screaming and crying. And this rarely happens to her right after she goes to bed, right? She'll have a night terror much later in the evening, so I knew something was wrong. And so I go in immediately to help her, and she's sitting in bed crying. I'm like, what's wrong? What's wrong? She goes, di-di, di-di, which is baby, right? That's how she says baby, baby, baby, baby. And I'm like, what, what, what? And I see one of her baby dolls in her bed that usually isn't in the bed. This is something they usually play with during the day. They don't bring it into bed. Cece had brought it into bed that day. And I'm like, baby doll? And she pushes the tummy on the doll. And it goes, wah! Wah! And Cece goes, ah! I'm like, oh, did the baby doll scare you?

Laura

No, anyone would have freaked out by that. Come on.

Shanna

Right. That's when she bolted up and was just like, ah. And so I was just so pissed at that doll that it ruined my plan.

Laura

I feel like that doll needs to disappear.

Shanna

God, it so needs to disappear.

Laura

So did you have to stay for a while to get her to go back to sleep? What happened then?

Shanna

Yes, I did. But I have to say these are the moments I cherish because Sissy doesn't let me comfort her all that often, usually because she's in some kind of like night terror, like get away from me thing. And the times that she's actually really scared and wound up are kind of rare. And so I just like get to swoop in like the mother bird and pick up my baby and comfort, you know, hold her. And that's when she just really snuggles in and We did that for a little while and it ended up being okay, but it didn't solve the early wake-up problem because she didn't actually get to bed early enough. So we're still struggling with these early wake-ups. That sucks so bad. I'm so sorry. I know. It's so ridiculous. Moral of the story, don't let those crying and laughing dolls into your children's bed.

Laura

Don't do it. Orange, your house just screwed. They don't exist.

Shanna

Exactly. So we're having a tired week and I'm working on this but other than that we're fine and happy and that's pretty much all I have to report for this week. What about you guys? How are you doing? I hope you're not as tired as I am.

Laura

Yeah, it doesn't sound like we're as tired as you are. Actually, I was a little concerned about sleep this week because we took a trip. We went to Fresno to visit the grandparents. And you know, it's always nerve wracking taking a baby or toddler on a trip to see if they would actually sleep somewhere else. But I'm happy to report that he slept very well at Grandma's house. And we had a really nice trip. It was just a really nice time to see everyone. We got COVID tested before we went. And we're extra safe. We got to see my dad and my stepmom a little bit before they actually went out of town on a trip. And then we stayed at my mom's house. And it was just a lovely time. And one thing I'm noticing, oh, I should say that my toddler is 21 months old now. He turned 21 months this week while we were in Fresno.

Shanna

That's exactly like CeCe when she gets on FaceTime with Nana. Nana's like, hi. And CeCe says, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.

Laura

It's so rude.

Shanna

I know. It's so rude. Nana takes it in stride, though.

Laura

Yes. My mom loves it actually because she loves my stepdad and she's very happy that my baby has a relationship with him. So it's very sweet. And so getting to see grandma and doodles in person was like bonus time. So that was really fun. And papa, he calls my dad papa, papa and grandma Yvonne. So it was just really sweet watching him bond with them. And Getting to like actually play with doodles is beard. That's a big draw. So it's really sweet. The only downside of that is when we had to leave he was pretty sad and like it's kind of heartbreaking to have to explain to them like so we drove home from Fresno it's like a three and a half hour drive and Oh, and I should say, from a potty training perspective, we put diapers on him for that drive because I was not dealing with stopping every 30 minutes and trying to get him to use the potty on the side of the freeway. That's in the side.

Shanna

And I was like- Oh, he missed Grandma's story. I know.

Laura

He makes me tear up just thinking about it, because he wanted Grandma to tell his story. And I had to be like, well, Grandma and Doodles, they're home. They're back home. And we can face time with them later. And for a couple days, every time you'd wake up in the morning or from his naps, you'd go, come on, Doodles? And I was like, oh.

Shanna

Oh, that's so sweet. I remember as a kid, when my grandparents would visit from across the country, when they would leave, I would bawl. Like, it just felt like the worst betrayal. It's like, you're leaving me! No! I just loved them so much. And now our kids are going through that.

Laura

I know. I mean, luckily, my mom lives close enough that we can visit. We haven't seen her for three and a half months, which is like the longest she's ever gone without seeing my guy. She was like, she was losing it. She was like, I have to see him. He's my baby. I need to see him. Like, wait, hold on. He's my baby. But yeah. So she was just as happy and she missed him just as much. But it definitely, you know, I see the appeal now of living in the same city as your parents.

Shanna

I wish. I so wish I lived in the same city as my mom. It would be so nice. She's only six hours away in Phoenix, but still. That's like a significant distance. And I miss her and would love for her to see the kids all the time.

Laura

Yeah. And it's a long drive, especially as our parents are getting older. My parents are older than your parents. So, you know, I'm not like super keen on my mom and my stepdad driving super long distances to come see us. But, you know, it's just tough. But we try to see them as much as possible. We face time all the time. So it was really sweet to be there together. have him have his special grandma time.

Shanna

And how fun. Well, what about your pregnancy? How's everything going and how far along are you now?

Laura

I'm 22 weeks. And yeah, I'm everything's sort of chugging along this week was travel. So, you know, I have to be a little careful. Every time I visit my doctor, he's like, any travel plans? It's like his stock question. And I'm usually I'm like, no, but he's like, good answer. And this time I was like, well, we're going to present. And he's like, I'm okay with Fresno. He's like, Fresno, I can deal with. He's like, but you know, I don't want you sitting for more than two hours of time. I want you to move around. And he gives me sort of like a little lecture about making sure I keep moving. So he has like more to say about plane travel, I think. When we went to Hawaii last time I was pregnant, he had like a whole thing about it. He's okay with a three-hour drive to Fresno. So yeah, this week at 22 weeks, I think I'm starting to notice that my Braxton Hicks have started.

Shanna

Whoa, that's like, I don't know. That was early, isn't it? I feel like I don't remember mine until like 30 weeks or so.

Laura

Yeah, so I also thought it was early and initially was like, oh my god, this is a problem and I Google it and apparently, apparently some doctors say that you actually have Brax and Hicks like starting at like six weeks or something. And you don't feel them like it's just a matter of being kind of like tuned in to them. And I don't know actually if I would have even identified them as true rex and Hicks except for I think I would have just thought it was like exhaustion basically or like gas because what was happening is I started to notice that if I was pushing myself too hard like too much walking around, too much chasing the toddler, just having a long day. I would start getting like achy and need to lie down. And then I felt my stomach and I was like, oh, it's hard as a rock. I'm like, oh yeah. That's what those Braxton Hicks felt like.

Shanna

Yeah. I do remember that they would kick in when I was more active during the day too. It's so interesting how that happens. I'm not sure why.

Laura

I don't know why either, but it's a thing because I googled it because I was, of course, like, oh my god, early labor, what's happening? They weren't painful, but they were uncomfortable. And I am now realizing it's my body being like, chill out, put on the brakes, stop doing all this shit you want to do, which sucks because I'm like, but I have nesting to do. And the baby is finally in bed. Why won't you let me?

Shanna

Yes, I dusted right through those Braxtonics. Oh my god, yes.

Laura

I need to clean out my closet right now, don't you understand? But yeah, it's definitely annoying and definitely a wake up call because of course the minute I like recline on the couch and drink some water and chill out, they go away. So body is definitely trying to tell me something.

Shanna

Yeah, at least you have a solution for getting them to go away for a while and have that relief.

Laura

Yeah, it definitely works. Also, it's a really good excuse to be like, Corey, do the dishes. To be fair, he always does the dishes. So I am not complaining, but it's a good excuse to sit down and just relax. It's hard for me too. It's hard for me to give myself an excuse to sit down and relax when there's just so few hours in the day to independently get stuff done. But

Shanna

Oh yeah, it's like jam it in. Jam it all in. That's like the motto of my life right now.

Laura

I know. It's like you have one hour to get things done. And it's inconvenient, body, for you to be telling me I need to rest. Give it a break. But so yeah, so that's happening this week and the fun thing is that the baby kicks are really starting to kick into high gear and they're like not only easy to feel on the outside like I'm starting to see them on the outside.

Shanna

Oh my goodness. That's always so weird.

Laura

It's so weird. It's not the big, I mean, the very end I remember of my last pregnancy, it was like that scene in Alien with like the alien trying to come out and maybe it was Aliens, the sequel, but it's not quite there yet. But I definitely can start to see the taps and stuff. So, you know, it's nice to have that reminder that there is a little being inside of me. And it also makes it a lot easier for Corey to feel it, which is nice. My mom got to feel some kicks too.

Shanna

Oh, that's great.

Laura

Yeah. Which, although she like, I was like, oh, mom, the baby's cooking. You want to come field? She's like, yeah, yeah. She gets like real close both hands, like, you know, really, really gets into it. And then she's like, oh, I felt that. And I'm like, I don't think that was just like, just let her think she felt something.

Shanna

Oh, yeah, mom. That was a big one.

Laura

Oh, yeah. There it was.

Shanna

Well, take this time to relax and slow down. You'll be thankful later. I know, I know.

Laura

Anywho, shall we take a break and then come back with our special segment? Yes.

Shanna

We're back and I'm very excited about this special segment, The Row Back. It's the second time we've done this and it's a fun one. We tell interesting stories from our past that might influence the way we parent now. So Laura, you are up first. I'm dying to hear your throwback story. Take us back.

Laura

All right, I'm taking you all the way back to, it was 1995 or six. I don't know exactly, but the mid 90s. I remember them fondly. Yes, yeah, I do too, actually. It was a time before smartphones where you called your friends on their landlines. I loved that.

Shanna

I would talk for hours with my friends on the phone.

Laura

ever call waiting. If you had like the thing where you could, what do they call it where you could like patch in someone from call waiting?

Shanna

Oh, I don't know, party line or something.

Laura

Yeah, three way calling or something. Three way. Yeah, yeah. Oh, Star 69 to find out who just called you. Oh, that's right.

Shanna

Star 69. Or if you wanted to like conceal your number, if you called somebody, it was like Star 87 or something.

Laura

Oh, I don't remember that. I don't remember that. Yeah.

Shanna

Very important.

Laura

So this is the era.

Shanna

Okay, just setting the scene, I'm feeling there.

Laura

I was 13 in eighth grade. I was very into like going to thrift stores and finding like baby tees. Baby tees, oh God, so great. Little like mini skirts with thigh highs and stuff. Oh my God. It was crazy. I'll have to try to find a photo of that.

Shanna

OK. Yeah.

Laura

But none of this is about fashion. I'm just trying to set up, set the seed. OK. I was in like eighth grade and I had a great group of friends who I still am friends with today, by the way. I was literally just on a WhatsApp chat with all of them talking about things. We're almost all parents and stuff. It's very fun. And we were a very tight group, and my brother had a very tight group of friends too, who like, overlapped with us. My brother was just under two years older than me, but because he was an August birthday, he ended up just being a year ahead of me in school.

Shanna

So... Oh, I didn't know that. Okay.

Laura

Yeah. So we were just a year apart in school, and so our friends all knew each other, and he was a boy and we were girls. So, you know, older boys tend to hang out with younger girls just a little bit, right? Basically the point is just have this like big friend group and everyone knows everyone and everyone's you know there's always like dramas and romances and stuff but.

Shanna

This by the way sounds like 1,000 times better and more exciting than my junior high experience just. want to say I'm feeling jealous. Yeah, exactly.

Laura

Well, I mean, my junior high experience, this is not to go into a different story, but it had its real weird dark points. Don't get me wrong. OK. But there were bright spots, which is that my group of misfit friends were around. And my brother's misfit friends were also around. And we all got along. So my mom was the cool mom. My mom was the mom who everyone would come to if they had a problem. My mom was the mom that would tell my friends that they could stay with us for indefinite periods of time if they were having problems with their families. My mom was the mom who was basically everyone's counselor. cheerleader. And by the way, she's like working more than full time as a doctor at this time and like just overextending herself like crazy. But she was like super mom, right? And everyone loved her. And part of why everyone loved her is that she always took us on like trips.

Shanna

And not on the coast, more inland.

Laura

Correct. Yeah, it's between the mountains and the coast and in the big San Joaquin Valley, which is very flat and very dry and very hot. And in and of itself, you may know of Fresno because it's like the butt of a lot of jokes. Like you'll hear the word Fresno thrown about as like a place you don't want to visit. I'm just going to reserve judgment on that because I don't want to get in trouble with my friends who have really stuck with Fresno and who are really working on making it an awesome place to live. I choose not to live there. We'll leave it at that. But one real major benefit of Fresno is that it is a day trip away from basically the entirety of California.

Shanna

Right?

Laura

You can take a two-hour drive and get to the coast. You can take a two-hour drive and get to Yosemite. You can get to LA in three hours. You can get to San Francisco in three hours. That's great. That's a huge benefit. It's a huge benefit. Easy to escape from. So my mom took advantage of it. My mom was like not about to just hang out in Fresno every weekend. So what she would do is just like we had a van and she would just like pile as many kids as possible into this van. And we go places and she just be like, well, we're going to go to San Francisco today or we're going to go to Pismo Beach or we're going to go to LA or whatever. And now as a parent of one child, it like blows my mind that she willingly would like take six preteens or teenagers. off on adventures all the time.

Shanna

And that is amazing.

Laura

It is amazing, right? And she's so easy going about it. And I think part of it also is that she like, you know, I'm thinking like, oh, this is expensive.

Shanna

But I think that's what she like chose to spend her money on, you know, it's probably fun for her to like, she maybe didn't want to go to those places alone. I don't know before your stepdad was in the picture or what.

Laura

No, totally. Yeah. This was actually right around the time my parents were getting a divorce. So I'm sure there's some armchair psychology that can be done there about how that played into it. But my mom was totally enthusiastic about packing us all in. One year, oh my god, this was like, I think I'm going to tell this story about what happened when I was 13. But I think it was like literally later that summer, She took six of us to the Tibetan Freedom Concert in San Francisco, which was this giant, it was like Proto Coachella, right? It was like a two-day concert. It was like Red Hot Chili Peppers, Bjork Beck, Rage Against the Machine. There was a, oh, Smashing Pumpkins, I mean Smashing Pumpkins. Amazing.

Shanna

Those are all the big, big groups of the time.

Laura

Yeah, I think this was 96. So it might have been a little later. But they, she just like got tickets for six of us, my brother and two friends and me and two friends. And then like, let us loose.

Shanna

Oh, the good old days.

Laura

We didn't have cell phones. We was just like, show back up at this time. It was like, And do you know what happened to my mom during that concert? This is such a tangent.

Shanna

Oh, this isn't the story. No, I know. She's the wheeze. OK. I know.

Laura

OK. No, no. But this is like sort of like demonstrating her style. So during that concert, she ended up working in the medical tent.

Shanna

Lots of head injuries on three-year-olds.

Laura

I've still never forgiven her, though, because at the end of the first day, they were like, thank you so much for helping us. Can we get you some backstage passes as a thank you? And she said, no, Shanna. Why? What in the sweet hell is she thinking? I was so mad. I was so mad. I was so mad, but she does that. She did actually get a free poster from the concert that she ended up framing. And it's actually hanging in my toddler's room right now. Oh, OK, that's sweet. Yeah. OK, so this is the type of person we're dealing with, right? OK, so just randomly in 1995 or six, she said to us like, hey, do you guys want to go to Magic Mountain this weekend? Invite your friends. We're like, yes, please. Because Magic Mountain, for those who don't know, it's Six Flags Magic Mountain. It's like a huge roller coaster theme park. It's so fun. Oh my gosh.

Shanna

Oh, it's all about the thrill rides, yes.

Laura

Yes, yes, yes. And we were all about that. So I invited a couple friends, and Jeff invited a couple friends, and we were off. So we get in the car, we drive. It's about two and a half hours to get to. It's just north of LA in a town called Valencia. It's like an hour north of LA, so two and a half hours to get down there. When we pull into the parking lot of Magic Mountain and it's like fairly empty and I remember we were all thinking like, oh my gosh, this is going to be so great. It's going to be empty and we're going to have the whole park to ourselves. So awesome. And so we all excited. We walk up. It's a really long walk from the parking lot. And we get to the front to buy our tickets and the woman says, what school are you with? And we were like, what? And my mom's like, why? Why are you asking?

Shanna

Yeah, I guess not.

Laura

Yeah, you just go. Nowadays, you buy your tickets ahead of time because they're $2 cheaper and you get your parking pass and all that stuff.

Shanna

Oh, yeah. I would never go anywhere without buying tickets ahead of time. No. Yeah. Yeah. Forget it.

Laura

Do you remember going to the movies without buying tickets ahead of time? Oh, my God.

Shanna

And you just like stand and look up at the board and see what's playing next and hope there's seats. Oh, my God.

Laura

For looking in the newspaper.

Shanna

And you get the front row because there's no seats available and you can't reserve your seats. The past was bullshit, man.

Laura

Although I feel like in most parts of the country now, you still don't reserve seats in movie theaters.

Shanna

What? Oh, I have no idea.

Laura

I think it's an LA thing. OK. Listeners, let us know. Because in LA, if you go to the movie theater, you like reserve your specific seat. And I don't think that's happening.

Shanna

We're fancy like that, I guess.

Laura

But maybe it's changed in the last couple of years. But last time I went to a movie in Fresno, we did not reserve a seat. OK. But anyway, that's another tangent. So, Shanna, what do you think you would do if you had a gaggle of teenager, young teenagers excited to go on roller coasters and you were told that the park was closed except for private groups?

Shanna

Oh, here's what I would do. I see that you're upset. Oh, it's, you know, it's okay to express your big emotions. We need to turn around and go home. You're right, parenting me. You know it.

Laura

Well, I like to think what I would do is be like, okay, you know, not Sparey Farm or Disneyland is just like an hour away. Let's just go there, right? Just go to an alternative or be like, you know what, let's go to the beach in LA instead or something, right?

Shanna

Yeah, there's plenty to do nearby.

Laura

Yeah, I would not do what happened next, which is my mom is like, I'll take care of this. She disappears. We're all just like standing there twiddling your thumbs, not knowing what to do, right? And she was like, don't talk to anyone. I'm going to help you back. She disappears into this little trailer they have set up, which is where I remember that's where you would go to get your picture taken for your season pass, right? Oh, OK, OK. And she disappears in there. It's there for about 20 minutes. Then she comes back out. And this kind of starts like whispering under her breath. She's like, if anyone asks, we are a private middle school from Fresno, California. I am your principal. And then she brings us into the trailer and is like, thank you so much. I can't believe our reservation got lost. I swear I sent it in over a month ago. These kids are just really been looking forward to it.

Shanna

Oh my god, they probably assumed you paid ahead of time or something. Yeah, that's probably why that day worked.

Laura

I don't know what kind of magic my mom worked, but she got us in. And just like we expected, because it was like a private event, the park was at like probably what, 10% capacity or something. So we were running around, like we owned the place. We kept giggling about like what our school was called and like, what, where, you know.

Shanna

I wish you could remember what it was called.

Laura

Yeah, we decided we were like the Fresno Christian Academy or something like that. Cause also all of us were like, We were a very diverse group of friends who came from varying backgrounds. I remember my friend Isabel was there. She's Buddhist. And we were agnostic, half Jewish kids. It was a very mixed bag. So we thought it was hilarious to think we were some straight-laced Christian school. But yeah, I actually still have pictures from that day. And it was just so fun.

Shanna

And she saved the day. Wow.

Laura

And you know, the moral for me, I don't know. Like it still makes me uncomfortable to think about being in her position and making up that lie. Like I guess now it's a lot more verifiable. Like you probably couldn't just do that. You know, they'd look you up and be like, that school doesn't exist.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

But I don't think anyone was particularly hurt. There's no real victim that day. We still bought a lot of food in the park and souvenirs and stuff. And I'm sure Magic Mountain didn't go under because this seven of us got free admission. But yeah, and yeah, it makes me think that, you know, I think I would do anything for my son. But I don't I don't know that that that's definitely out of my comfort zone. And it makes me think that I got to like maybe loosen up a little bit to be a fun mom. I don't know. Maybe or maybe I'm not going to be fun mom. But I really loved having the Fun Mom, you know?

Shanna

Yes, you'll just be the Fun Mom that buys tickets ahead of time and confirms that massive theme parks are open.

Laura

I'm the Fun Mom who does her research, yeah.

Shanna

Yeah, there you go. That's true, yes.

Laura

And that is my story. Love it. Shanna, I know you have a story.

Shanna

I do. I have a story from actually the exact same year. What? Yes. Yes. I was older, of course, because I'm more geriatric than you. Yeah. And I can't wait to tell it.

Laura

But I think we are going to save it for the next episode because I went on a little long and I don't want you to feel rushed in telling your amazing story from the mid 90s.

Shanna

Oh my god, okay, thank you. Yeah, so we'll save it for the next episode and you guys can hear my saga from the 90s.

Laura

I can't not wait.

Shanna

Should we take a break and move on to our BFPs and BFNs? I think we should.

Laura

All right, so we are back and we close every show with a Big Fat Positive or a big fat negative of the week. Shanna, do you have a BFP or a BFN for us?

Shanna

I have a BFP. Yes. Yes. My BFP this week is stickers.

Laura

Ooh, stickers. Okay.

Shanna

Yes.

Laura

Anything in particular? Just stickers in general.

Shanna

Well, I've always loved stickers, of course. You know, we've talked about our obsession with Lisa Frank back in the day, and I had a sticker book and whatever. And recently, when I was setting up our little home preschool, I was buying lots of supplies. And I noticed that one of the things my girls really seemed interested in were stickers that had come with like a coloring book or something. And I was like, OK, we'll follow that. We'll follow that lead. And I went on Amazon and bought a bunch of sticker books. And it is amazing because the girls will be engaged with playing with these stickers for a long time. Really? Yes, especially CeCe. loves it. She learned how to like pinch the paper and actually pull the sticker off, which was very hard for her at first. So I had to supervise a lot.

Laura

Okay, I have a lot of questions. First question is, do they not get permanently stuck to every service in your house? Have they improved sticker technology since we were kids? I know, I know.

Shanna

I don't know that they've improved it. Probably. I think they're probably a little less sticky. But I was going to say that is one of the downfalls of stickers is they end up everywhere. I mean, the worst is in my shag rugs, you know, it's like stickers get stuck in there and it's like, oh my God, trying to pick those out. on the wood floors is really hard. They will end up on my clothes. I like wash my clothes and I've got like little wash stickers everywhere. But what I really try to do is stay on top of it because if it gets onto the wood floor and we forget about it and people walk by and step on it, it just gets more and more adhesed. So I really am now just this person that spends 30 minutes running around picking up stickers. So, I guess that one evens out.

Laura

Well, okay, that was my first question. My next question was, I've noticed that my guy, he is totally interested in stickers as well, but I've never gotten them for him because I wasn't sure if they were safe. As far as what? Like choking hazards or I don't know.

Shanna

Oh, interesting. That would probably be a problem for younger babies when they were really putting everything in their mouth. CECE was in that phase around like nine to 12 months, but she's not like that really anymore. If she's teething, she'll chew on something hard, you know? But these stickers, she does no interest in that. What she does, which is very amusing to me, is she will stick them either on paper or somewhere on her body, just one on top of the other, on top of the other. until she just has like this weird, huge mask. stickers, which of course stresses me out, right? Cause I'm like, that's not the way you're supposed to use stickers. But she enjoys it. So I, yeah, we haven't had that problem with stickers. Yeah.

Laura

Yeah. You know, it's funny. It's been gradual for us, but I think I've realized that my guy has finally gotten out of the, I put everything in my mouth stage. He was there for a very long time and it was very stressful, but I think we're finally there. So that's good to know. I have noticed he has interest because when we were at my dad's this week, he had a little ouchie on his knee. And he's always like, knee, knee, like any time it would like get rubbed the wrong way, you know, he stumbles and falls like all kids. And so the problem is I wasn't ever able to get a band-aid on him, but I also didn't have any cute band-aids. And so my stepmom was like, oh, I've got some unicorn band-aids. Do you want to try it. I was like, okay. And he freaking loved the Unicorn Band-Aid, was talking about the Unicorn Band-Aid all the time.

Shanna

Yes, it is tricky. You could buy one of those packets. Melissa and Doug has a great set of, they're not stickers, but they're Stick-ons, you know, like the plastic that can stick on to, I don't know.

Laura

Oh, like glass and stuff.

Shanna

Glass and glossy paper. Those are great and really fun. And I actually haven't tried those with Cece, but I bet she would like those too. So maybe that'll be the next thing I get.

Laura

OK. Well, let me know. And maybe I will follow suit.

Shanna

Yes. And specifically, if anyone wants to know what we're using, that's been such a big hit. I mean, stickers are cute as shit these days. There's just so many options. But we got this sticker book on Amazon called 1000 Plus, ridiculously cute, absolutely necessary, crazy, fabulous, awesome, stellar, cool, phenomenal stickers. Series one. And it's very colorful. all kinds of different themes, a different theme on every page. Elle's favorite page is like the stinky page and it's like stickers of like slime and toilets and funny stuff like that. So it's really a fun, a great way to keep them entertained. They work on their fine motor skills and then you get the opportunity to clean up stickers for 30 minutes.

Laura

Win, win.

Shanna

Win, win. All right, what about you? What do you have this week?

Laura

I also have a BFP. And mine is singing songs, which sounds very generic, but specifically the fact that my toddler is now starting to sing songs. He's all of a sudden just become really good at singing songs back to us. And I started noticing it when we were in Fresno. We sing him before his nap and before bedtime, we sing him Twinkle Twinkle and Baba Black Sheep. And I had started noticing that he would start to sort of mimic along with the tune and stuff. But then this week, all of a sudden it was like, full blown twinkle twinkle very clear. And I was like, holy shit, like you can get through this whole thing. And it is the cutest thing, like absolutely heart melting. I have some audio. Do you want to hear him singing twinkle twinkle? Okay, here we go.

Shanna

Oh, yes. That's adorable.

Laura

And he looks so cute. And the other thing that I noticed is that there's a song we sing in my toddler and me class that we do, our virtual toddler and me called Jello in the Bowl. Do you know about Jello in the Bowl? No, what's that? OK, so it's like, It's like a movement song. So you put your hands up, you're holding up the sky, right? And you're like, jello in the bowl, jello in the bowl, jiggle, jiggle, jiggle, jiggle, jiggle, jello in the bowl. And then there's birdie in a tree, and you do little chirping with fingers. And then there's ducky in a pond, and then there's turtle on a rock. And so at the end, it's dynamic. So it gets quiet, and you go turtle on a rock. And you have your like fifths one on top of each other and the top one's kind of crawling like a turtle. You go turtle on a rock, crawling, crawling, crawling, crawling, turtle on a rock.

Shanna

What? Oh my gosh.

Laura

And it blows my mind. I feel like it's a leap. I don't think Wonder Weeks is happening anymore. I don't think it covers up to this age. No, they ended. Yeah, but it felt like such a huge leap in language and understanding. Because not only is he just sort of, he's not just repeating back. He's not just being a parrot repeating back. He's remembering. And he's like, he knows to get quiet on the turtle part. He knows to get loud on the mouse part. He's like, so fascinating to watch. Just so cute. That's amazing. But the other thing, it's kind of hard at nap time because nap time and bedtime. So like just last night, Corey and I were putting him to bed and we always do twinkle twinkle and then we always do ba ba black sheep and then we put him down. And we were rocking him, you know, going twinkle, twinkle, trying to be all calm. And he just goes full voice.

Shanna

But what a fun family moment.

Laura

It really is. It's so sweet. It's so, so sweet. And I just love watching it. And also like I'm just really impressed. Like I'm just very impressed by him. So makes me feel like a proud mama.

Shanna

Yeah. Aw, that's so sweet. CeCe has been listening to Enya, her L's old routine of listening to like 10 straight hours of Enya music on her Alexa is now transferred over to CeCe. And just reminded me. Oh, no, go flow.

Shanna

She's kind of singing. She wants us to sing our lullabies to the tune of Enya. It's bananas. Well, we put her down. And I put her down. And then the second I leave, she's in bed just like, Enya!

Shanna

Anya, Anya, Anya, Anya. And like I watched back the video and she just like saying Anya over and over and so enthusiastic about it. And yeah, it's like their connection to music is becoming stronger now.

Laura

Yeah. And he's doing the same thing. He'll be in his crib and he'll just be like on his back just singing his songs like not going to bed. So I guess there's a downside to it, but you know, he's entertained. He's not crying.

Shanna

Oh, to me, that's no downside. That's like, yeah, she's entertaining herself. She's in her room. I get to do what I want to do, like whatever. I'm just like totally down with her. That's true. That's true.

Laura

That's free time. Yep. Yep. Yep. But anyway, speaking of free time, shall we go give ourselves some free time and wrap this episode up? I think we should. Who am I kidding? We're going to go do all the million things we need to do on our to-do list.

Shanna

Oh, that's right. Jam it in. Jam it in, baby. Oh, that sounds dirty. OK, anyway, thank you guys so much for listening. If you have anything you want to share with us, any throwback stories, oh boy, we would love to hear those from you. Laura, where can they reach us?

Laura

We are on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at BFP Podcast. We also have a website, bigpatpositivepodcast.com. You can send us an email, you can include a voice memo if you want, to contact at bigfatpositivepodcast.com. Finally, join our Facebook community group. It's a fantastic private group. Just search Big Fat Positive Community. Please answer the two membership questions and that will get you right through. So you can join in on all the amazing conversations we're having in there.

Shanna

And thank you, everyone, for the reviews and ratings you've been leaving for us. Thank you. We appreciate it so much. It really helps other people find our show, want to take a chance on the show, and we're so grateful. And if you haven't done so yet, please go to iTunes or wherever you listen and give us a rating and review. And if you love the show, please spread the word, let your friends know about BFP. Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko, and Steve Yager. Thanks for listening, everyone. Bye. Bye.