More Mom Wins: Rescued Outings and a Found Child

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Laura

Welcome to Big Fat Positive with Shanna and Laura. This is a special bonus episode where we share two mom wins that we just did not have time for in the last episode, so let's get to it.

Hey, Shanna. Hey. Hey, OK, so let's hear these extra mom wins. What you got for us?

Shanna

OK, well, this happened this weekend. We've had a little rain recently. So we've had some nice weather, cooler weather than usual. And this weekend, we were sitting around the house doing too much damn screen time as a family. And I'm just like, we have to get out of this house. So the plan was for us to go to a nearby park, bring the girls bike scooter, and they can like scooter around this big circle in the park. They've got a playground, like lots of stuff to do. And in my mind, I'm like, I can get some exercise, get my body moving by walking around like this big path of this park and That'll be good for me too. So we hop into the car with all of our gear and we start heading toward the park. And as we're driving there, we drive by this little hike area that's near our house that we've been to before. And I'm like, oh, or we could go there.

And in my mind, I'm like, that's an even better place for me to take a walk. It's like this long trek through one of the wooded canyons near our house. It's beautiful. The trees are amazing. There's a creek that runs along it. It recently rained. So in my mind, I'm like, there'll be water in the creek, and it'll be nice and naturey and just a better vibe than just a general park with a playground, right? Like that'll be more exciting. And everyone agreed. It was nice to have my spontaneity validated. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So we found a parking spot and hopped out. No scooters or anything. Just walking. And we're walking along and we don't get maybe one tenth of the, no, not maybe one 20th of this long luxurious hike I'm hoping to take when the girls are like, the stream. And I'm like, oh yeah, the stream. Let's go like take a peek at the stream.

And the stream is a huge alluring draw to my kids. Of course, they always love water. So we like go down this little cliff side and go down right by the stream. And we're like, you know, trying to skip rocks on the little pond part of the stream and water's trickling down. It's really cool out. It's probably like maybe 60 degrees, which to me, as I'm sure you and I listeners know is fucking freezing.

Like I wish I had my electric blanket. Just kidding.

Laura

Yeah, you weren't wearing your big sweater blanket or whatever on this side.

Shanna

I wasn't, but I definitely had on my fleece lined leggings and a hoodie and all that. It was chilly for me. So in my mind, I'm like, oh cool, we'll just take a little break here at this and then continue our walk. And that soon proved to be difficult to do. These kids did not want to leave this part of the stream. I mean, they were finding rocks, skipping rocks, looking at the water flowing down, sticking their fingers in the water. And I'm like, oh, they're enjoying it so much. You know, like, all right, we can stay here a little bit longer. And as we're playing there, Steve's like, ooh, I have an appointment. I need to go take a call. And I'm like, OK. Excuse me.

Laura

I have to go do some business over here.

Shanna

He's like, I don't get a great reception down here. So I'm going to go back up to the car and do this call. And I'm like, OK, all right. So it's me and the girls. And we're playing down there. And I still have a little hope that we can actually walk. And I turn around and Cici is angled deep in the actual stream. And I'm like, oh.

I was not prepared for a stream play. I was prepared for just an actual city park. So I have no extra shoes, no extra clothes, nothing in my backpack. The only thing in my backpack are a bunch of snacks and some water. And I'm like, oh, shocks, honey. OK, well.

And I'm trying to encourage them not to go full on in this water, because the water's really cold at 60 degrees. But Cece is not bothered by this cold water on her shoes and socks at all. And in fact, she starts running through the stream, through the pond area. And before I know it, her pants and shirt are completely soaked, but she's having the time of her life. And so that's where I'm like, What do I do? Am I the grumpy mom who's like, I wanted to walk and it's too cold. You can't do this. Or do I kind of like try to tamp down those anxieties and stuff and just be like, you know what, this might be a fun ass activity for my kids. Like they don't get to play in streams very much. Maybe I'll just let him go for it. So I was like, all right, go ahead and keep playing in it. And Elle looks at me like, can I I do it like the desire in her eyes. She's like, oh, can I? Can I?

Like she knew she probably shouldn't. And I'm like, fine, go for it.

Laura

Oh my gosh, I have some photos. Let me send them to you. I love this because it's like my parenting style, which I sometimes call the fuck it parenting style. It's like they want to do something. Ah, fuck it, whatever. Go ahead. Who gives a shit? 100%. We're the jellyfish parent. Oh yeah, the jellyfish parent. That's right. That's right. This is proof. The other thing is that these kids, like, at least my children, are not phased by being cold at all. Like they could be wearing short shorts and no shirt in like 30 degree weather. And they'd be like, I'm fine. I'm fine. You know, like Corey and I will be all bundled up wanting to get under a blanket on like a cold winter's morning. Meanwhile, Augie is literally running around naked. Like his body will be like splotched all over.

You know, his skin will be like all modeled because he's, you know, his body knows it's cold, but his brain doesn't give a shit. You know, his brain is just like, Naked time.

Shanna

It's so true. It's so true. Okay, so here I'm sending you a video of them in the creek. This was kind of the beginning of their good time.

Laura

I can tell it's the beginning because L is still in a dry shirt. All right, let's see.

Yep, they're going straight through. It comes up to like almost up to CeCe's knees. And L, it's more like shin height. They're jazzed. I hear you muttering in the background. Oh my God.

Shanna

Oh, that's so great. So here's a photo of them a little bit later in the process.

Laura

Yeah, they're soaked. They are soaked. Elle's entire arm is... I love the peace sign, though, but Elle's entire arm is completely soaked. And here's the last photo I took of the day. Oh, they're washing their hair. Cool. They're just using it as their bath. They're probably freezing bath.

Shanna

Oh my god. But this whole outing was partially motivated by my desire to take a freaking walk and get some fresh air. So I was like, fuck it. I'm a jellyfish parent, right? Let them do what they're going to do. And I literally started walking circles around the small bank of this little thing. I was like, I'm going to count my steps. Hey, at least I'm moving. I'm moving my body. I don't have to stand still in one spot to watch them do this. So I was walking around in circles, keeping an eye on them, letting them have a blast. So maybe we both won a little bit in the end. But I was really proud of myself for letting go and letting them make this memory.

Laura

I wish you had a video of Steve's reaction, though, when he showed back up and saw what had happened.

Shanna

I know, right? When he was done with his call, he's like, all right, I'm done. I'm heading back down or whatever. I'm like, all right, we're heading back up. The girls are completely soaked and they're like, carry me, carry me. Of course. No. I think I was even warning them about that throughout. I'm like, I'm not carrying anybody. You guys are going to walk. back to the car. So they're walking like little zombies, right? Like stiff legged, just kind of like through the coldness. We're getting there and we get to the car and I'm like, I'm not going to put them in their seats soaked. So we stripped them down completely naked to ride home. Just like a three minute drive home. That was the highlight of the day for them. They were so fucking jazzed. Oh my L is like, oh my gosh, I have never ridden in a garcy naked before. This is the best day of my life.

And Cece is giggling and we'd like put on the heat like so hot.

Laura

It was hilarious. That's amazing. Oh, Augie would die to be able to ride in a car seat naked. But I feel like with a penis and scrotum, it might be a little more dangerous, if you will, with that crotch buckle.

Shanna

Yeah, yeah, true.

Laura

But yeah, yeah. Wow. Well, that is a win. You got outside, you got your fresh air, you got your steps in, and those girls had the time of their lives.

Shanna

Yeah, exactly, right? It was a win. And I want to hear yours, Laura. But first, I think we should take a quick break. Sounds like a plan.

We are back and Laura, I'm dying to hear your bonus mom win.

Laura

Okay. So this happened at the Disconso Enchanted Forest of Light, which was an event I talked about in a couple episodes ago.

Shanna

Right. I was going to say, I remember that.

Laura

Yeah. I held the story back for a mom win segment. And it's actually a mom win, not with my own children, but with someone else's child.

Shanna

Oh, did you breastfeed someone else's hungry child, Laura?

Laura

I have always wanted to do that. I know that's really weird. It's not like I don't want to, but I'm always like, man, I have this magical power, this superpower. I have food out of my boobs. If necessary, I could feed someone else's baby, but no one's asked me.

Shanna

put up an ad on Buy Nothing Group or something.

Laura

I'm sure someone will take you up on it. Yeah. No, that's not what happened. So I was there with Corey and Augie and Sebastian and my mom, and we had gotten to this point that was sort of like, it's a big loop, but it was like at the, I don't know, it's the end of the first section. It's sort of a point where you kind of turn around and go the other direction and food and drinks and like band playing I think was actually like a high school jazz band Amazing, I love that. Yeah, and it was super cute and cozy and whatnot and we had kind of gotten separated So Augie and Corey were off doing God knows what my mom had like gone to the bathroom or something and I was walking around chasing Sebastian who was just like out of his mind with excitement, you know, would not let me carry him would not let me put him in the stroller.

He was just like ping-ponging around the whole point, just excited, pointing at everything, finding every speaker like he found every speaker he could find that was playing music and had to point it out. And as we're doing this, it's crowded. It was a Saturday night and it was very crowded and I see a bunch of families streaming by and at some point I see a little boy who's about Augie's age walk by just sobbing right just full meltdown sobbing and walking and I took notice of him but he was right behind these two adults a man and a woman and he was like walking directly behind them and I was like I don't know what's going on with this kid but I'm guessing he's having a meltdown about something and his parents just like don't know what to do so they're just like

keep walking with us right we've all been there it's like okay like we gotta keep moving kids so you can be upset about your thing but like we're walking right like it sort of seemed like that because he seemed sort of attached to these people but i i kept an eye on him out of the corner of my eye because i'm a nosy bitch you know and i was like wondering what was going on with him And then these people, they kind of glanced back at him. They kept glancing back at him, which is part of the reason I was like, oh, they're with him, right? Keeping an eye on their kid. But then they glanced back and then like walked in the other direction and the kid didn't follow. And I was like, that's weird. So I scooped up Sebastian and walked over to the little boy who's now just standing there stuck in a spot sobbing. And so I crouched down and I'm like, hi, honey, are you OK? And he's like, no.

Are you lost? And he sobs and nods his head. I was like, okay. And that's when the mom in state kicked in. I was just like, this little boy reminds me of Augie. He's scared and he's lost. I'm going to take care of him. This will not stand.

And so I crouched down, read right next to him, and I said, my name is Laura. I'm a mommy too. And I'm going to take care of you. You're safe now, okay? And he's still sobbing, but I, you know, take him by the hand and walk him over to, there's like a little gift shop nearby. Because I remembered from when I briefly lost Augie at Kidspace. that the staff at these places like have protocols in place for finding lost kids. So it's like, okay, I'm going to go find a staff member and they'll be able to radio around. And it was a little cold too. So I was like, we'll go to this gift shop and we'll do that, right? It's in this little cabin. It's very adorable in Descanza Gardens. So we slowly walk over and I'm talking to him and trying to reassure him and get him into the gift shop. And there's a huge line of people trying to buy gifts, but I like cut to the front.

I was like, this little boy is lost and They jumped to attention. You know, they're like, okay, can you get his name? And so I was trying to get his name. Poor thing. He's sobbing. So I like talk him down a little bit and I finally get his name out of him. And he was so sweet. He was like, that's my name. My mommy has a different name. I never remember it.

Which is totally something agi says like he'll be like he'll say his whole name first middle name his last two names are beeric and of it or is actually his middle name his second middle name is beeric my last name is last names of its quarry's last name but he'll say like agi blah blah blah beeric of it and then i'll be like what's my name he's like hmm Laura you have a. weird name or something like that. I'm like, it's the same as your whatever. Anyway. So he was like, I don't know my mommy's name. I'm like, it's OK, honey. They'll they'll find you. OK. So I then like they were calling around and there was a little enclosed patio of this little cabin gift shop. Right. So I was like, let's go out here where it's quieter. And I mean, I'm never going. I'm not going to leave you. I'm going to stay with you until your parents show up.

One failing I realized thankfully I didn't totally fuck up cuz he did turn out to have a mommy and a daddy but I realized I was like saying like who's your mommy and daddy and like later I realized like. He doesn't necessarily have a mommy and a daddy you know that could have been the wrong question to ask you had to daddy's to mommy's neither you know he could have grandparents or. answer whatever.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

So in the future, I think I would, the next time I find a lost kid, I'll be like, who are your grownups? Right. That's good.

Shanna

Yeah.

Laura

But anyway, so I was like, were you here with your mommy and daddy? And he was like, yeah, we were at the oak trees. And we were at number five, which was like every section was number. And I was like, oh, OK, so we're at number four. So they're going to be really close. And the real mom win for me though was when he was hysterical instead of crouching down and trying to just reassure him and say like it's okay. You're safe. Nope. There's no problems. What I found myself saying to him was you're really scared, huh? It's really scary to lose your mommy and daddy huh and he like nods and is immediately connected with that right and i was just like fucking right parenting with their man you know like. I wish like this shit works cuz instead of being like. You're OK. You're OK. We're going to find your parents, which is like frantic energy, right?

Just looking in the eye and be like, this is really scary, huh? And then following it up with, but I'm here. I'm a mommy. I have a little boy just your age, right? Because I mean, I was guessing, but he looked around for and it turns out he was for. And I was like, and I am not. I'm going to make sure that you are safe until you're back with your parents. And he it was just like so heartwarming to watch. And I felt like such a super mom. Doing it because I was just like, wow, this is some like mom superpower shit because he was instantly reassured, you know?

Shanna

Uh-huh. That's so amazing. I guess that's why Dr. Becky and Janet Lansbury are so popular because like this shit does work if we actually try it. But it's kind of cool that you got to try it as an experiment kind of on another child and see that. And I love that you even thought to do that. Like that's such a beautiful connection that you gave him in a really scary moment.

Laura

Yeah. And, you know, it was a little underwhelming when his dad showed up because obviously they were freaked out. Like his dad first showed up with their little one-year-old. So like they were in a similar situation. They were, of course, were panicked and they were excited to scoop him up. And of course, I was waiting for my gold star. But, you know, I just got to like thank you and then I just kind of went out my way. But there is a little epilogue to this story, which is I could not get this out of my head, and he had a really unique name. And I was like, his mom must be in one of my mom's groups. So I went to one of my mom's groups and I typed in his name. And lo and behold, not only is his mom in one of my mom's groups, but we had been on the exact same thread the day before.

Shanna

What? Talking about what?

Laura

Looking for Discanso tickets. No. What? Because I was looking for one more for my mom and she was looking for some. So I was like, what are the chances? So anyway, I messaged her and I was like, that was me who found your kid. And she then, you know, then I got like a really like, oh my God, thank you so much. We were so scared. And now we're Facebook friends. So there you go.

Shanna

Oh, what a small connected world. That's amazing. I know. Good job, Laura. You kicked into gear with those mom instincts. I'm so proud of you. You saved the day. Good job.

Laura

Thank you, thank you. But you know, heroes do need to rest. So I think that might be the end of this bonus episode.

Shanna

I think it is. Listeners, as always, if you have any mom wins you want to share with us, please let us know. We'd love to hear from you. Laura, where can everyone find us?

Laura

Big Fat Positive community on Facebook and request to join.

Shanna

Our show is produced by Laura Birek, Shanna Micko and Steve Yager. Thanks for listening everyone. Have a great week. Bye. Bye.

More Mom Wins: Rescued Outings and a Found Child

January 20, 2023

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More Mom Wins: Rescued Outings and a Found Child

January 20, 2023

Listen Now:

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This episode's sponsors:

Whisker Litter-Robot

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Episode Transcript